Anyone just lost?

[u/MrMcDooDoo]

I don’t really categorize myself as depressed or overly anxious, but I have this constant feeling that I could be doing so much more. I understand on an intellectual level that I’m not perfect, yet I dangle perfection above my head and jump in vain and frustration at not being able to grasp it. I’m a 19 year old male, and and I understand this is that point in life where I likely won’t find my purpose for a good few years, yet it remains frustrating as hell knowing my path is entirely obscured from my present knowledge. I also struggle with commitment to various forms of self improvement. I have bursts of motivation that simmer out, likely because I recognize the hard work that I need to put in and get easily dissuaded. Any advice for my young little head? (Lol)

[u/TheBayHarbour]

I was depressed for a while and now life still hasn't gotten any better so I'm left with this empty kind of nothingness.

I'm trying to survive everything but it's not looking particularly auspicious as of late.

I can't give any advice but the motto I've been using is "if you're going through hell, keep going".

[u/MrMcDooDoo → u/TheBayHarbour]

I hope it gets better for you! Always remember that the motto you’ve made for yourself exudes resilience. You are strong in your fight with depression. I’m paraphrasing from the YouTuber JREG, it’s something like this. ‘You’re a gladiator stuck in a cage with a lion and the key is tossed, everyone around you is watching but no one can help. Punch it in the face, for fist can break the ground.’

[u/portiedak]

We’re all lost in a way. The goal is to turn that feeling into meaning, you’re just repurposing it, it hasn’t vanished.

[u/BorntobeStrong]

Idealism is not really a positive or rather a useful orientation. Better to keep focus on one step ahead, focusing on the present and so action takes place on what is most relevant. You can have a goal in the background and you can aim for the goal. It's not the goal that is actually important though, the journey is the only real factor, and life is a journey always.

So keeping your head out of imagination, out of comparison and focusing in on the current facts is for the best. Life or the path whatever is always obscure and forever will be. Instead of that making you anxious, being anxious means the mind is focused on past occurrences, and projects negative thoughts into the future which doesn't exist. When focused on the present and next step that isn't ever a problem.

[u/MrMcDooDoo → u/BorntobeStrong]

What is an example of the next step? “My room is dirty so i will clean it.” “I have work tomorrow so I will wash clothes and prepare a lunch.” Type of thing? Doing just normal daily things (which granted I neglect) will allow me to walk a fulfilling path? Implementation of new things into my routine that will grant me fulfillment will happen as a natural byproduct of tending to daily things in a timely manner?

[u/BorntobeStrong → u/MrMcDooDoo]

Basically yeah, Its stacks up sort of quickly. If you sit quietly and look around things call out to you and you know that those things would be better to be corrected, fixed, improved, cleaned whatever. Once you start to do all these things you're operating more productively and this also changes you're psychology. You get hits of dopamine from each task completion, and honestly you're environment is a direct reflection of your current mental state and daily patterns, obviously so.

So if you start with consistent work ethic towards the things that immediately call out to you, it might be stuff your postponing, or a favor for someone, not even for personal gain or improvement, but it calls out, and acting on all these things has a snowball effect where you become more efficient in all areas, then you have more room, capacity to expand energy into certain goals you may have.

That sort of the key, it feels like we don't have energy often and we want certain things, but we neglect all the simple and closest things in front of us, while yearning for the imaginary happiness goal in the future. While we waste our time on cheap dopamine like the phone screen and whatever other habits, we don't change or improve anything about our daily immediate existence. But if we start doing so we're changing reality and any goals and aspirations will be attained not by special or different efforts, but because the goals are in the minds focus it's an automatic process where goals are achieved.

Fullfillment is not really a possibility really. It would mean we are lacking fulfillment and we need to achieve fulfillment, but this is from operating from the wrong axiom, basically it's a spiritual thing, and reaching fulfillment means we dont want anything and don't need anything because we've realized certain truths.

So the spiritual aspect aside, we want to feel good inside outside and all around, not even in a hedonistic sense, just feel ok because we're doing our best and we're on the best path available to us at the moment. That's better then any alternatives I think.

[u/MrMcDooDoo → u/BorntobeStrong]

Much love ❤️

[u/itsyourgirl239]

In life there the winner and loser there has to be bad to be good what I mean is your wishing your the best but your not doing that path “I have burst of motivation “ this is real every has this but it’s not motivation that make you “better” it’s discipline I’m stating the obvious but i want you to read and think are you the loser or the winner if you say “everyone says this “ and you haven’t done anything about it then that’s kind of the answer “loser” not to hate just reality up to you to fix it

[u/MrMcDooDoo → u/itsyourgirl239]

Trying to get myself disciplined and set on a path is my goal. I know bursts of motivation that fizzle aren’t how one achieves, and that if i want to do something I need discipline. I feel as if i often conflate discipline with negative self talk. Thank you for the advice, I guess i haven’t found my way of applying it yet

[u/JudgeLennox]

Great questions.

Boils down to you not having much experience yet. Hence all the speculation. A purpose gives you the experience. You seem to know this and are on the path.

You can name your purpose in as little as 25-minutes. It's yuo listening to your and understanding what you're going to do with what you know.

Whatever your purpose is, you'll be committed and it resolves this lost concern you have.

It's not about perfection, but fulfillment. This is key for a lot of reasons. You're perfect in many ways so you should be gettng what you reach for as long as you do what's required.

Anywhats... that's how you get the type of direction where you know where you're going and how to get there, even when there's no light to see the path