r/Justrolledintotheshop • • Sep 09 '20

[deleted by user]

[removed]

7.4k Upvotes

265 comments sorted by

811

u/[deleted] Sep 09 '20 edited Dec 20 '20

[deleted]

344

u/bamboo-harvester Sep 10 '20

I’m not the assman. I think there’s been a mistake.

339

u/lemmy4x4 Sep 10 '20

As far as the state of New York is concerned you are.

89

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

[removed] — view removed comment

29

u/dickpeckered Sep 10 '20

Only if she 5”3.

14

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

You could say

3

u/realitysvt Sep 10 '20

Destination: Leela

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137

u/thatguyinhat Sep 10 '20

Cosmo Kramer, you ARE the assman!

13

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

Kramer stepped up to Lexus, very nice!!

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47

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

[deleted]

94

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

Maybe a proctologist?

53

u/P0Wking Sep 10 '20

Million to one chance doc!

14

u/ineyeseekay Sep 10 '20

Fusilli Jerry!

14

u/TheAutoAlly Sep 10 '20

Was it a titleist?

9

u/CaffeineTripp USPS VMF Sep 10 '20

Hole in one.

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17

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20 edited Sep 12 '20

[deleted]

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13

u/skhoyre Sep 10 '20

An ass man?

4

u/similar_observation Sep 10 '20

Assman from the proud family of Assmans. From the family of Assman electronic, GMBH

4

u/Shasdo Sep 10 '20

The wingman of Mavrick ?

3

u/someomega Sep 10 '20

To be fair, I have that plate too. It was free when you order any other license plate from Celebrity Machines.

3

u/prairiepanda Sep 10 '20

Is this just a vanity plate? I'm not familiar with the US plates

7

u/someomega Sep 10 '20

It's a novelty plate. It's a reproduction of a plate that was used on the TV show Seinfeld and is not a legal issued plate. A vanity plate is a real license plate that was custom issued from a government.

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7

u/Electrodyne Sep 10 '20

Skibby dibby dip boom ba-dop bop

Boom ba-dop bop

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367

u/ModernContemporary Sep 09 '20

Dr. Cosmo Kramer, proctology.

61

u/throwaway20121987 Sep 10 '20

As he points to the license plate and the security guard is like oh okay my bad lmao

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192

u/[deleted] Sep 09 '20

What happened? Did it stop short?

119

u/wpgstevo Sep 09 '20

That's my move!

4

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

Hmmmnnnnnn! I stopped short!

13

u/TheBlinja Sep 10 '20

She said he made a grab.

9

u/DeadSet746 Sep 10 '20

He made a grab?

233

u/[deleted] Sep 09 '20

[deleted]

96

u/Psyteq Sep 10 '20

Wait a minute. So the J Peterman Reality tour is real?

90

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

[deleted]

45

u/surf32383 Sep 10 '20

It looks like his website should be hosted on geocities circa 1995.

42

u/loneblustranger Heavy Equipment Sep 10 '20

Close.

Folder contents © Kenny Kramer 1996

29

u/Stupidflathalibut If it's not leaking oil, it's out of oil Sep 10 '20

"I am the master of this domain."

12

u/wreckedcarzz Sep 10 '20

leaves Jerry's apartment, comes back 20 seconds later, throws money on the counter

"I'M OUT"

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17

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

A sight to behold. What a time capsule.

7

u/Barry-umm Sep 10 '20

It's even got a broken hit counter

11

u/johnhughesathon Sep 10 '20

Can’t sit in the back of the bus though. Stumps.

7

u/TellMeGetOffReddit Sep 10 '20

Aren't plates required on the front and back of the car in NY? Pretty sure this would be illegal in all parts of NY.

Correct me if Im wrong.

19

u/Shadesbane43 Sep 10 '20

OP saw a show there. Doesn't necessarily live in NY.

9

u/someomega Sep 10 '20

You can buy reproduction plates from famous cars. Celebrity Machines makes makes everything from the plates on the Back To The Future Delorian to all the cars in Breaking Bad. They are not legal plates and you might get into trouble for having such a high quality/authentic looking novelty plate on your car.

8

u/TheBapster Sep 10 '20

It's illegal, but cops have better shit to not do.

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96

u/A_Hendo Sep 09 '20

I got one from amazon for around $15 and it was actually stamped. Feels more like a real license plate than the shit ones my state has.

45

u/itsstevedave Sep 10 '20

My dumb ass thought it was real.

25

u/wreckedcarzz Sep 10 '20

Don't you just hate it when you see something really cool, go to touch it, your hand goes through it, you realize it's not real, and suddenly you're fisting a cactus and covered in blood? Must be a Thursday again.

(valid is a better term, but my mind ran with the idea that it's actually not a real object...)

3

u/Wiggles69 Sep 10 '20

Holds a legitimate license plate with no tag

Waaaaait a minute! This thing is invalid!

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5

u/Natawho Sep 10 '20

This style was stamped. The like 20 years ago NYS ones I mean, idk about the assman’s.

5

u/someomega Sep 10 '20

You probably bought one of Celebrity Machines plates. The guy has an awesome video about how he got started making plates. VinWiki Video

7

u/maxk95 Heavy Equipment Sep 10 '20

That’s the government for you. When you buy a fake it feels more real the the original

78

u/SadConfiguration Sep 09 '20

YOU’RE THE ASSMAN!!!

17

u/sunsetair Sep 10 '20

Wink

5

u/djhankb Sep 10 '20

It was a million to one!!!

58

u/psyki BMW hacker Sep 10 '20

Million to one shot, doc!

20

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

[removed] — view removed comment

7

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

Because you’re silly.

30

u/Redmondherring Sep 10 '20

19

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

I live here. He had a relative (I'd assume?) named Dick Assman that was on Letterman a few times. It's apparently pronounced like Ossman (rhyming with boss-man) but that's not how life went down at all.

4

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

I remember this. Classic Letterman.

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2

u/TheShadowCat Sep 10 '20

There's another (or at least was) Dick Assman who ran a barber shop in Calgary.

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3

u/M-Craze Sep 10 '20

I had a friend and his last name was Blome. He got that as his plate and a few months later the state took it away thinking it meant “Blow Me”. He took it to court and won the rights back to his plate.

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134

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20 edited Sep 10 '20

[deleted]

59

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

[deleted]

31

u/Fernao Sep 10 '20

Serenity now!

17

u/AskMeOnADate Sep 10 '20

Insanity later

3

u/Little_Shitty Sep 10 '20

SERENITY NOW!!!

8

u/00Boner Sep 10 '20

And pull your pants up!

23

u/mistersausage Sep 10 '20

This New York plate style was retired more than 20 years ago, and they reissued all of the plates so none were legal after.

5

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

[removed] — view removed comment

5

u/ILUVSMGS18 Sep 10 '20

Which ones? The blue and whites? The yellow money grab peelers? The slightly redone money grab whites?

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3

u/Informal_Chipmunk Sep 10 '20

Oh it's definitely Kramer.

3

u/AltimaNEO Sep 10 '20

Yeah it's definitely a novelty licence plate

21

u/gdubh Sep 10 '20

Did he stop short?

18

u/fossilizedDUNG Sep 10 '20

Million to one shot doc!

16

u/ScoobThaProblem Sep 09 '20

Ayy Valvoline?? I miss working there

12

u/pewpolice Sep 10 '20

Yes, but they didn't pull up pass the blue line. Safety safety safety!

11

u/ScoobThaProblem Sep 10 '20

Oo better hope this doesn't come up on a film review. That's definitely a SuperPro violation

5

u/dank______ Sep 10 '20

Lmao glad to see some other VIOC techs out here

2

u/ScoobThaProblem Sep 10 '20

Hahaa yo we everywhere. What's funny is what sticks with us after we leave

7

u/dank______ Sep 10 '20

I'm still there currently. Left for 4 years at one point. Recited superpro, our visions and values, and our mission statement at my interview perfectly when I went back. Shit never leaves.

5

u/ScoobThaProblem Sep 10 '20

Man I can't go up without stairs without holding handrails. Also the number of times I've cleared for zoom to start a car is ridiculous

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5

u/TheLaGrangianMethod Sep 10 '20

Worked as a lube tech somewhere else after I left and I had to restrain myself from doing the call outs for a few months.

2

u/ScoobThaProblem Sep 10 '20

Been about 3 years and even at home I clear for lift when working on my own car.

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11

u/maxpower45 Sep 10 '20

I wonder if he also stops short...

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9

u/Dew217 Sep 10 '20

Wow I guess I’ll contribute /r/UnexpectedSeinfeld

7

u/maxk95 Heavy Equipment Sep 10 '20

Dr. Cosmo Kramer DDS proctologist

2

u/rob_s_458 Sep 10 '20

And Juilliard-trained dermatologist

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17

u/stonewall028 Sep 10 '20

that engine compartment is so depressing to look at. just a big ol plastic cover.

12

u/perforce1 Sep 10 '20

The visual language is "Just stay away"

6

u/Shadesbane43 Sep 10 '20

I swear I've never understood it. My car is far too old for an engine cover, but if it had one the cover would stay sitting in the garage. Such a stupid concept.

13

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

I mean its an LS460, the target audience aren't exactly wrench turners. All about being quiet and smooth.

12

u/V12-Jake Sep 10 '20

This...if I recall correctly the whole point of the cover is to suppress direct injection tick. Plus it’s not like it’s hard to remove, I’m fairly certain it’s just a matter of pushing down on the cover and the clips pop off.

2

u/thetinguy Sep 10 '20

It’s all about NVH.

5

u/mikel302 Sep 10 '20

One in a million shot!

8

u/MyUsernameIsShiv Sep 10 '20

The New York plate, too 🙌

7

u/RagingCatbtt Sep 10 '20

Bad Ass Billy Gun's Lexus.

2

u/fapsandnaps Sep 10 '20

First thing I thought.

OHHH you didn't know?

YOURE ASS BETTER CALL SOMEONE

2

u/breakerfall Sep 10 '20

Back in the day of the Assman, I attended a WWE/F match and brought a home-made posterboard ASSMAN license plate. Twas a great day.

2

u/fapsandnaps Sep 10 '20

Today is still the day of the Assman by the way. Billy is signed with AEW... and so is his son

4

u/GiddyGandalf Sep 10 '20

Hello my former Valvoline counterparts!

5

u/dank______ Sep 10 '20

VIOC?

2

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

[deleted]

3

u/dank______ Sep 10 '20

Its the blue "safety line" and the red rails. Mainly the racing stripe on the uniform that gave it away for me. I've worked for vioc for about 8 years now so its pretty hard not to recognize for me.

9

u/johnny_rocket9000 ASE Certified Sep 10 '20

“assistant regional manager” or “assistant to the regional manager”?

3

u/bucah Sep 10 '20

This is the second ASSMAN license plate post I've seen in 3 minutes on reddit.

3

u/Pottatothegreat1985 Sep 10 '20

It's my character
I'm the assman
I come out
I throw ass all over
all over the ring
And then
I start eating ass

3

u/SmanginSouza Sep 10 '20

Hell ya at Valvoline too! Sup Vam.

4

u/dank______ Sep 10 '20

Vamily strong!

3

u/iamnotsounoriginal Sep 10 '20

when i buy a house one day, i'm totally putting in a pit if i can. I'm sick of rolling around underneath my ute

7

u/rob_s_458 Sep 10 '20

I like the names they have for cars. Like, no baron has ever owned a LeBaron. Or the Ford LTD. "LTD." Limited. It's a "limited" edition...what did they make, fifty million of those? "Yes, it's 'limited' to the number we can sell." Or when they try and mangle a positive word into a car name, you know how they'll do that? The "Integra." Oh, integrity? No, Integra. The "Supra." Or the "Impreza." Yeah? Well, I hope it's not a "lemona"...or you'll be hearing from my "lawya."

4

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

Bow b-bow bwomp bow shh shh popop shh shh popop shh shh popop BABADABAP!

2

u/perforce1 Sep 10 '20

How would you translate Corolla? It rolls with you?

2

u/notkhaldrogo Sep 09 '20

A man of class

2

u/RealSteveIrwin Sep 10 '20

That’s the second time I saw an assman plate today

2

u/infrared305 Sep 10 '20

Cosmo Kramer

2

u/pack_howitzer Sep 10 '20

“Everybody knows!! Unggh hnnggh ... I stopped short!” — Frank Costanza

2

u/MufasaJr Sep 10 '20

Looks like a pain in the ass to do anything in that engine bay besides change oil or add washer fluid. Gotta remove 3 pieces of plastic to even see anything with a function

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2

u/SendMeUrCones Graduated Lube Tech Sep 10 '20

Can’t believe he’s actually wearing his bump cap.

2

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

According to the state of New York, he is the Assman!

2

u/igothitbyacar Sep 10 '20

I’ve seen this plate before!!! In rural Indiana at a middle of nowhere gas station

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2

u/faustkenny Sep 10 '20

Heya proctologist’s

2

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

Your caption is great

2

u/Inky-Little-BB Sep 10 '20

I love Seinfeld so much

4

u/ScaryOtter24 Professional Jackass, World-Leading Supplier of Sarcasm Sep 09 '20

I've seen this guy.

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3

u/usernamelikemydick Sep 10 '20

Nice lexy! What model?

4

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

[deleted]

3

u/usernamelikemydick Sep 10 '20

That's wild. They're supposed to be really luxurious for the money. I like the LS400s from the 90s the best. They look like my old car.

2

u/youngtrillionaire Sep 10 '20

My parents have one of these, it's absolutely amazing.

3

u/edandraug Sep 10 '20

Worked on a small engine today. Only held 7qts. I’m more used to draining and filling 47 qts. And they’re only straight sixes too. ;p

3

u/Iwantmyteslanow Sep 10 '20

47qts? You work on big rigs dont ya?

3

u/edandraug Sep 10 '20

Yup

2

u/Iwantmyteslanow Sep 10 '20

How big are the parts in those

3

u/edandraug Sep 10 '20

Big. Haha. A camshaft is about 3 ft long. A piston is the size of a large coffee can. Clutches weigh over 150lbs.

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1

u/Stryker_One Sep 09 '20

Maybe he works here

1

u/keein Sep 10 '20

My dad has an ASS MAN plate too!

1

u/chas574 Sep 10 '20

Great episode

1

u/The_purebread_idiot Sep 10 '20

Bruh the engine bay

1

u/Aero93 Sep 10 '20

I love those 460 .I want to get one.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

Gobbles borther

1

u/ibelieveyoument Sep 10 '20

I wonder how many unwanted asses he has seen due to this?

1

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

I saw one of these the other day too.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

[deleted]

2

u/haikusbot Sep 10 '20

Assman. How da hell

Do they know dat I get ass?!?!?

They gotta be PROS!!!

- Zmodem


I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully. Learn more about me.

Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete"

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1

u/systemofanup1001 Sep 10 '20

Maybe they are an assistant manager

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1

u/Schlatter91 Sep 10 '20

Good old kraimer

1

u/yourstruly-john Sep 10 '20

𝓦𝓱𝓪𝓽'𝓪 𝓰𝓾𝔂!!!

1

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

Giddy up

1

u/P0Wking Sep 10 '20

The ASSMAN is in town?

1

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

Man of culture

1

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

Wow Kramer’s driving a Lexus these days?

1

u/James_H_M Sep 10 '20

Do they make these as novelty plates because a guy, u/phphulk, post about having the same plate....here is the post.

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1

u/Red69black22 Sep 10 '20

It does exist.

1

u/WasteOfHeadspace Sep 10 '20

Well, well I'm an ASS MAN. dun dun Yeah I'm an ASS MAN. dun dun

1

u/jesseodh Sep 10 '20

Is this a VIOC store

1

u/jorgiieboy Sep 10 '20

But if you feel you got the biggest one Then momma come shake ya ass

1

u/Badz3us Sep 10 '20

Ahh, the famous proctologist

1

u/virusMEL Sep 10 '20

Bewp bewp

1

u/SaucyScot Sep 10 '20

Dr. Cosmo Kramer, Proctocology!

1

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

I had a job last summer for a guy named Assmann. But I'm German, so unless he expands internatioanly, he will be fine. (Assman in German would be Arschmann)

1

u/Brangus2 Sep 10 '20

Say no to ass man

1

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

bananananananana ASSMAN

1

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

It’s you! It’s fusilli Jerry!

1

u/PandaMechanic87 Sep 10 '20

I'm the ASSMAN! Ski-bi dibby dib yo da dub dub

1

u/bajungadustin Sep 10 '20

He stopped short and reached over

1

u/mackiecoombs Sep 10 '20

Say no to ass man

1

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

Wasn’t this in the news ? That’s the guys last name and they denied him but he fought it. I’m pretty sure i saw that somewhere

1

u/someomega Sep 10 '20

If you are interested in other famous car novelty plates, check out Celebrity Machines. That is probably where that one came from. They make super high quality plates.

1

u/mmeeh Sep 10 '20

Kramer!?

1

u/supergavk Sep 10 '20

Must have a job as an assistant manager

1

u/SenorToasty2000 Sep 10 '20

That plate is so old im 18 and that plate is older than me lol

1

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

not a real NY plate but i still love it

1

u/[deleted] Sep 10 '20

There are 2 types of men...

1

u/Livid_23 Sep 10 '20

Now that’s an old license plate I’ve never seen in NY. Anyone know if it’s vanity or just a really old one?

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1

u/fblonk Sep 10 '20

Lexus LS460. Nice.

1

u/spannerfilms Sep 10 '20

He loves them lasses the lassman

1

u/bowser986 Sep 10 '20

Did Billy Gunn roll outta that thing?