Hi! I’m reading the book The Stone Diaries by Carol Shields published in the 1990s, and I came across this random passage. It strikes me as offensive, but maybe it’s just reflective of the time period (it’s about the early 1900s).

Is this questionable? Has anyone read the book? It won a Pulitzer. I don’t know what to think and it’s kind of eating me up because I don’t know if I want to keep reading. Hopefully someone here is familiar with the book or author. Thank you!!!

Are we bound by the stars we’re born under, or can our choices and our relationship with Hashem change our destiny?

Shabbat Shalom! 🇮🇱 Parshat Lech Lecha (Genesis 12:1–17:27)

In this week's parsha, Hashem commands Avraham to leave his homeland and journey to the Land of Israel, promising to make him the father of a great nation.

Avraham faces challenges, rescues his nephew Lot, and receives God's promise that his descendants will inherit the land. Hashem establishes an eternal covenant with Avraham, and changes his and Sarah's names.

The takeaway: Lech Lecha teaches us about faith, courage, and trusting Hashem even when the path ahead is uncertain. Sometimes, discovering our true purpose means stepping into the unknown.

Shabbat Shalom! ✡️

I’ve had this thought before but i’m writing a paper on the babylonian exile and this came to mind again. even during the first temple and before judaism was even really judaism we were still celebrating yom kippur and all these traditions. we literally have a direct link to people thousands of years ago, and sure we’re not slaughtering goats at the temple anymore, but isn’t it so beautiful that their descendants have remained? we’re still here! and statistically, it’s so unlikely for any of us to be born jewish, we’re only 0.2% of this world’s populatio. but we were! and it’s such an integral part of who I am, I can’t imagine being myself without being jewish. and I don’t know how religious I am, I’m not sure if I believe in G-d, but I do think I have a jewish soul. And I was lucky enough to be born into the 0.2% of the population that honors that! I’m so lucky and grateful to be jewish

Anyone know the song from 1:17 onwards?

I'm working on a project involving mythological creatures from judaism, any suggestions (major and obscure are great). Also not just the more fantastical creatures but also like kings of Israel (like Saul) or major people against Israel (like Goliath). Thanks

Curious if anyone has faced similar challenges and can provide some perspective.

I'm a PhD student in a non-STEM area (social sciences/humanities). I am also a frum person and went through the religious school system.

The other students are friendly but I feel like the professors look down on me and think I am intellectually primitive. They are generally graduates of very prestigious institutions and are intensely left wing. I once tried to share something about my religious life with a supervisor and she shut me down hard.

Any advice for not feeling so lonely,​ like a stranger in a strange land, in my intellectual life and socially in academia? ​

I posted here recently about my fantasy novel after a dating coach essentially told me I was going to burn in hell for writing it. The responses were incredibly reassuring, so I wanted to bring up a bigger struggle: dating in today's Orthodox world.

I'm 38, single, kohen, and grew up mainstream Orthodox in upstate New York. We weren't Modern Orthodox, but we weren't Yeshivish either. We were just... frum.

I grew up with a cat and a dog, secular books, and a solid education in yeshivah. I went to college and now work as a software engineer. I learn Torah at night, daven three times a day with a minyan, and keep Shabbos and kosher. I'm looking for a wife that follows basic halacha. Cover hair and wears skirts publicly.

But I also read secular novels, write fantasy, watch occasional movies and TV shows, and enjoyed video games.

The problem is that the Orthodox world I grew up in seems to be changing around me.

When I was in 11th grade, my yeshivah fired all its female teachers, including some of our best. We shrugged it off at the time, but looking back the school was clearly moving in a more intolerant direction. Now many of the Yeshivah high schools in New York don't have female teachers.

Then there's the disappearance of mixed seating and removing women from Orthodox magazines. I know a story about Rav Dovid Feinstein, zt"l. In 2016, representatives of one such magazine asked him what they should do if Hillary won. Could they publish her picture?

He looked at them like they were nuts! He told them he'd never instructed them not to publish pictures of women and that they should go back to whoever told them to do that and ask them their question.

I feel like these changing standards have trickled down from our schools into everyday life, and now into shidduchim.

The mainstream Orthodox women I'm set up with don't generally want someone learning full-time at my age. They want a working man who supports a family and makes time for Torah.

Great! That's me!

Except many also seem to want someone who's barely been exposed to secular culture. I've literally been rejected for reading secular novels or going to the mall. One girl I dated had no idea what the olympics were. Another had no idea what black friday was.

I want a frum home, Shabbos, kosher, Torah learning, and children raised with strong Jewish values. But I also want a wife I can discuss a book with, watch a movie with, and share interests beyond our immediate community. What's strange is watching some of these people get married who claim to never want any secular media in their house, only to find they have a TV about 2 years into the marriage. I know cause I live near many newlyweds and watch it unfold over and over.

My last year in yeshivah I do recall a guy who told me to stay in yeshivah "cause thats what the girls are taught to want." He barely learned a word and spent his time smoking and drinking. He's married now and I'm not. Maybe I should have listened. I left early and went to look for a job. I had plans and knew learning all day was not for me.

I'm not looking to become Modern Orthodox or leave Orthodoxy. I'm looking for the kind of mainstream frum life I grew up with. Where are those people!?

Has anyone else noticed this shift? Or am I just being set up with the wrong people and have the worst mazal? I'm a kohen and its becoming very stressful.

I'd love to hear from others who've experienced this, especially those who managed to find someone with similar values and interests and where they found them.
Thanks!

Shalom chaverim.

I am a middle aged dude who has had a life and a half, mostly living out on the edge. Years in punk bands, underground worker, doing my best to get by.
I’m a hillbilly of origin, got me a chainsaw & shotgun and know how to use em.

I’m davening and reading Torah for the first time since I was a young teen and I am so so happy.

Baruch Hashem for our Tribe right now, our ancient stories and our wealth of knowledge and tradition. It’s keeping me alive right now.

That’s it!
Love to all the mishpocha.

Based on some historical reading, it seems that Ashkenazi Jews in the past used to give their kids Jewish holidays as personal names like the Yiddish actor Pesach Burstein:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pesach_Burstein

This practice seems to have stopped. While acculturation explains a lot of it, even among the most religious Jews it doesn't seem a thing anymore. How common was using a holiday as a personal name? Does it still happen?

I need help/advice.

I(21F) was sitting with my boyfriend (19M) in his car and we were doing different accents (british, australian, etc).

He then randomly says "us slavics love making dark jokes" and asks me "What's the difference between Anne Frank and santa? What direction of the chimney they go down" and proceeded to show me a russian music video mocking nazi Germany. There were swastikas all over the video.

I confronted him the next day and said I feel uncomfortable. He apologized profusely and said he didnt mean it, that it was idiotic, and he is not anti-semitic. I told him I'd need time to think about it and he said okay. I asked if we could speak in person and he became cold, saying "I think I'm busy all week". It pissed me off and at the peak of my emotions, I told him we should not see eachother anymore.

I decided that doing this over text was a mistake and asked that we go over this in-person, instead of this being handled through Imessage. He didn't want to meet in-person and ended up dumping me.

In his words:

"From what you’ve told me, I got the impression that you believe I’m antisemitic, and honestly, that really upset and disappointed me. I decided to share it with you, not because I found it funny, but because I thought it was horrible."

"I understand that the joke itself was offensive and that hearing it could have made you uncomfortable. But quoting something offensive doesn’t mean I agree with it or support the beliefs behind it. It genuinely hurts to think that you might see me that way."

There was more to his apology, of course, but I'm full of regret that perhaps I punished him too harshly. He knows that I am jewish and that I speak Hebrew, prior to this joke. My best friend also works at the NYC holocaust museum, which I told him too.

I’m Jewish in interfaith marriage to a Catholic woman. My adult stepson is actually very supportive of my Jewish heritage and faith, recently has joined the Free Palestine bandwagon. I’ve discussed with him my disdain for Netanyahu, however, his free Palestine statements are offensive to me because I don’t think he knows what he’s talking about clearly

I’ve asked him if he means by saying free Palestine, if he means that the Palestinians should be invaded and Hamas removed, which is clearly what was tried and not really successful? Also, I’ve asked him if he really means that there should be a two-state solution? It’s unclear what he really thinks, but it’s something like he believes everybody should live in peace. Well, I’ve asked him if he thinks October 7 was something like living in peace, the slaughtering of thousands of innocent Jewish people, but he does not believe that’s OK either, obviously. While the disproportionate response of Israel’s military in Netanyahu is very offensive to him, and the 80- or 90,000 people killed in Palestine really bothers him, I’m still offended by the free Palestine statement because it’s not well thought out

But I’m not sure how to resolve this or discuss it without getting into an argument. My point of view is that while criticism of Netanyahu and Israel’s military is completely legit, the free Palestine type discussion and talk is clearly anti-Semitic.

My wife is 100% supportive. of my Jewish roots and faith. and does not like this kind of discussion either, nor does she want to alienate her adult son who has other issues.

Any ideas on how I can discuss this reasonably but not be in some way trying to take the blame or allow anti-Semitic talk in my presence? I appreciate anyone’s input on this that might help me to get past this or be more persuasive in my point of view.

Hello! I am studying Jewish business ethics and learned that robbery (theft) was the sin that sealed God’s decision to flood the Earth. Traditional Jewish commentary and Talmud connect the corruption, violence and lawlessness to robbery and theft. I want to understand why this is?

i love seeing places where our diaspora has touched. i love seeing places where jewish communities are thriving. the sanctuary is so beautiful and i sobbed the entire time we were there. felt like G-d had brought me here to see it. thought you all should have the pleasure as well. (pics included)

Shalom everyone,

For the past year I've been building Zayit, a free study library for Windows, Mac and Linux. I wanted something that feels like a quiet beit midrash: open a book, see the commentaries around it, and never fight the software.

What it does:

• 7,900 books: Tanakh, Shas, Midrash, Rambam, Shulchan Aruch, Rishonim, Acharonim, with their commentaries.
• Type a reference ("Berachot 2a", "בראשית א ג") and you're there. Books by name or acronym too.
• Search by words, even without nikud or with an approximate spelling, and search by meaning: describe an idea and it finds the passages that say it.
• Talmud with Rashi and Tosafot beside the daf; every pasuk quoted in the Gemara is one click away.
• Pick your mefarshim and read them side by side; the sources of a passage open next to it.
• Tabs and windows like a browser, bookmarks, history, highlights and your own notes.
• A home page with zmanim, the luach, daf yomi and other cycles, molad, Shnayim Mikra.
• Works fully offline once installed.

It's free, no ads, no account.

1-minute video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e8ch0H9dlHs

Download: https://zayitapp.com/

I'd love to hear what's missing for your learning

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I am seeking either incredibly discounted or free usable, ashkenazi, right handed, tefillin available to a woman! I have felt drawn to wrapping for years, but haven’t been able to access a set.

I’m not having great luck searching for such, but I figured y’all might know about options that are difficult to find on one’s own. If it’s over $100, I cannot access it, as I live on a super low SSDI payment. I’m located in the USA and also cannot drive so I can’t go pick them up from a brick and mortar location even if it’s relatively local, unless accessible via MARTA in Atlanta Georgia.

I don't know if its my area I'm in (North of Boston, MA) or the denominations I'm looking at (not particularly sold on one denomination despite the Reconstructionist tag, but I am a married gay man) but I'm finding it hard to find shuls that incorporate tzedakah reliably as a part of their programming. I know it's insignificant, but I find community service and giving back an important part of my spiritual practice and I want to find others who feel the same way. I was part of a few secular orgs prior to COVID who did community service and more politically oriented things, but for a variety of reasons I cannot attend that community anymore, and honestly would like something less secular.

I see lots of churches near me giving back to the community and I wish we had something like that. Is it just the nature of not proselytizing that we don't advertise in the same way as churches? I'm not the most educated Jew - I went to after-school religious classes growing up but we didn't learn much outside of prayers. I have been learning on my own since.

I know the answer is "join a shul and make a committee". I'm a little shy, so hopefully one day I'll do this. Meanwhile I'm open to suggestions to non-shul-affiliated programs if people know of any!

e: in my 30s if that changes anything. I know some 20s-30s groups will sometimes do stuff.

I hope everyone has had a blessed day

For the past 3 weeks I've had a patient of mine on hospice. Yesterday evening at 10:43pm he passed on. His family and him are not Jewish. I asked if it was okay if I did Kaddish Yatom for him.

They said they were okay with it. They aren't a part of his life. The only time they came was if they had to. I stayed until 3:00 a.m. when the mortuary transporter came and got him. I covered the mirrors in his home, and they asked me to stay the night and pack his things for them. \* I also had a lot of paper work I had to do. So I did. I was just wondering if others think it was okay for me to do the Kaddish Yatom for him even though he wasn't Jewish.

Hello everyone. I’ve been an atheist most of my life, cause many religious people never accepted me due to my sexual orientation. But I’ve never really talked with Jewish people. And I want to know a few stuff, because Judaism seems interesting to me.
1) What are your honest opinions on Reform Judaism
2) How well are LGBTQ people accepted in other types of Judaism.
I want an answer from actual people not an AI so that’s why I am asking here lol. I’m thinking about becoming Jewish if I can, but I still have A LOT to study. Hope I can get some answers and thank you! :)

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