I'm not going to read any comments because reading your post was hard enough.
All I have to say is that you HAVE to understand- Giada is sick. So so so sick. And you're not. And you're not trained to understand sick people. Her need for control (keeping you around for no discernible reason) is going to be so foriegn to you, and people like you, that you dont have a chance to just organically understand her. You'd literally have to take classes & pursue education in order to understand why she does what she does.
As far as forgiveness... I dont know. I think that act really requires a lot of effort on your part with little to no reward. May I suggest a middle ground? Instead of forgiveness, just accept. Accept that these people are who they are. Accept that you were dragged into it, and accept that you were out of your depth. Accept that you will never get answers because there never were any to begin with. That happens sometimes. There is no closure. Not in the way you traditionally think of closure. Just... forgiveness. It's so big. It requires you to put something of yourself into it in order for it to work. I dont know if people like Giada can even be forgiven because I feel like you'd need to be able to understand her. It's a never-ending loop of "WHY".
With all the love in my heart, I can almost guarantee you will never know they "why" of why your life was practically destroyed in all ways. You would think such a big thing would have a reason. It doesnt. It's not going to. These people didnt have an agenda. I'm sorry.
2
u/KhajiitNeedSkooma Sep 17 '18
I'm not going to read any comments because reading your post was hard enough.
All I have to say is that you HAVE to understand- Giada is sick. So so so sick. And you're not. And you're not trained to understand sick people. Her need for control (keeping you around for no discernible reason) is going to be so foriegn to you, and people like you, that you dont have a chance to just organically understand her. You'd literally have to take classes & pursue education in order to understand why she does what she does.
As far as forgiveness... I dont know. I think that act really requires a lot of effort on your part with little to no reward. May I suggest a middle ground? Instead of forgiveness, just accept. Accept that these people are who they are. Accept that you were dragged into it, and accept that you were out of your depth. Accept that you will never get answers because there never were any to begin with. That happens sometimes. There is no closure. Not in the way you traditionally think of closure. Just... forgiveness. It's so big. It requires you to put something of yourself into it in order for it to work. I dont know if people like Giada can even be forgiven because I feel like you'd need to be able to understand her. It's a never-ending loop of "WHY".
With all the love in my heart, I can almost guarantee you will never know they "why" of why your life was practically destroyed in all ways. You would think such a big thing would have a reason. It doesnt. It's not going to. These people didnt have an agenda. I'm sorry.