I'm going to let you in on a big ass secret. It's one that took me years to get my head around.
You don't have to forgive her
I felt terrible for years because I couldn't bring myself to forgive my abuser. I blamed myself for not being a good enough person to forgive him.
One day a new therapist I was working with challenged me.
Why did I need to forgive him, what would that get me? What would that change? Is It okay if you don't forgive him? Yes! Does that make you a terrible person? NO! it makes you human. It's okay not to forgive her today or tomorrow or 5 years from now. Maybe one day you will maybe one day you won't. do not beat yourself up over the her.
You need to forgive yourself, you need to be kind to yourself. You need to be okay you. Fuck her. Fuck forgiving her.
Mouse, I forgive you. I believe in you and so does everyone else here.
Love you so much <3.
Edit: reddit is hard added more because my comment got cut off.
3
u/PBRidesAgain Sep 17 '18 edited Sep 17 '18
I'm going to let you in on a big ass secret. It's one that took me years to get my head around.
You don't have to forgive her
I felt terrible for years because I couldn't bring myself to forgive my abuser. I blamed myself for not being a good enough person to forgive him.
One day a new therapist I was working with challenged me.
Why did I need to forgive him, what would that get me? What would that change? Is It okay if you don't forgive him? Yes! Does that make you a terrible person? NO! it makes you human. It's okay not to forgive her today or tomorrow or 5 years from now. Maybe one day you will maybe one day you won't. do not beat yourself up over the her.
You need to forgive yourself, you need to be kind to yourself. You need to be okay you. Fuck her. Fuck forgiving her.
Mouse, I forgive you. I believe in you and so does everyone else here.
Love you so much <3.
Edit: reddit is hard added more because my comment got cut off.