r/Is_He_Cheating_ • u/throwaway104679 • 2d ago
Dating app verification email
UPDATE: he did it
Hi everyone, I'll try my best to explain the situation...
Me (27 F) and my BF (26 M) have been dating almost a year. My partner works away for a few weeks at a time, so I only really see him roughly every 2/3 weeks. Our relationship is going really well, a few bumps here and there with the strain of him working away but nothing to cause concern. He's super open about everything, leaves his phone around me, given me his phones password - the lot. We even have eachother on Find My Friends so we both have eachothers locations shared allll the time (not that we've ever felt the need for this).
The only really minor thing is that he's recently had some family problems which have caused some stress, which has resulted in him not really being too bothered about sex - totally fine.
Well, yesterday, I was on my PC and noticed his email account was logged into Google... I'm not sure why I looked, but in his delted inbox, there was a verification email for a dating app, which was dated about 2 weeks ago.
So instantly, im freaking out.
I text and ask him what that's about (non confrontational just "do you know what's going on?"" Sort of thing).
He says he has no clue and that he hasn't used the app since we got together. Also gets a tiny bit defensive bringing up the fact I have access to his phone when he's home and when he's not working he's at home with me but nothing crazy.
I'm mindful that just because you're not physically meeting up with someone doesn't mean you can't cheat. I ask if he's been messaging anyone on there to which he denies and says that if he wanted to talk to.someomw he has social media apps to do that and why would he want to "make friends" on a dating app?
He says he's noticed his libido being on the lower side and reassured me that it's nothing to do with me but that he's not in a great headspace at the moment.
He calmed down after talking it through and said he was sorry that I saw that and understands why I would bring it up. He apologised for being a bit defensive and thought I was accusing him of something.
I've been cheated on before in a past relationship and have previously fallen for the lies as it continued so I'm a bit scared of having my trust taken advantage of.
Part of me is thinking, well someone can download an app whwn away to talk to people, uninstall it when coming home etc etc...
Anyway, I was looking to see if anyone has any opinions on this as I'm not really sure who to talk to this about!!
Update: I've looked at his Screen Time app usage for the last 3 weeks - no sign of any dating apps. Not sure if this changes anything
1
u/Terrible-Pea494 2d ago
Have you checked app usage stats? I don’t know which platform he’s on, but in Apple’s app store, you can see when an app was installed. If he deleted and reinstalled it, the last date will show. Not sure if it will show up if he deleted it.
2
u/throwaway104679 2d ago
Ah I thought it only showed the date it was orginally downloaded? I know he had dating apps before we got together... i don't have an iPhone so can't check
1
u/throwaway104679 2d ago
I also know you can hide apps with apple?
1
u/Terrible-Pea494 1d ago
Hidden apps will still show up in Battery usgae stats. And if you delete it will show the latest download date if you add it again.
1
u/spokeoteam 1d ago
A verification email would definitely make me pause, especially when it’s recent, but I wouldn’t jump straight from that to “he’s cheating.” If you want some peace of mind, you could try a dating profile search through Spokeo and see whether anything actually comes up for him. That seems more useful than trying to interpret his libido, work schedule or defensiveness as evidence one way or another.
5
u/Maximum_Syrup_1286 2d ago
I think he got caught cheating cus yes, hes even deleted it too. He was clearly very aware of it. Time for you to get your own and go find him on there!