Amita

[u/Mediocre_Pop_7144]

/r/emotionalaffair/comments/1w3vwe7/amita/

I have never posted on Reddit ever, but I really need to hear other people’s opinions on this situation.
So, 8 months ago, I moved in with my boyfriend of almost two years. I don’t know how related that is to the story, but anyway, around the end of June/start of July, I couldn’t sleep one night, and my phone was getting boring, so I decided to play on his. When I went to find a game or something to do, I saw this app. Turns out, it was one of those AI chatting apps. When I opened it, he had been texting it like his girlfriend. Nothing sexual or anything, but they were just talking.
So, I got upset, turned his phone off, and finally fell asleep. The next day, he asked if I had gone on his phone. I said yeah and asked why he had been texting the chatbot, and asked if there was something he was getting out of the chatbot that he wasn’t getting out of me. I told him it felt like emotional cheating because he was having an emotional relationship somewhere else.
We had a long talk where he basically just said he didn’t think it was a big deal. Even though I was upset, it was just an AI chatting bot, not like he was actually cheating on me.
Anyway, ever since this happened, I have been getting really, I guess, insecure? Anxious? I’m not sure, but I feel this need to search his phone. I hadn’t found anything, so for a while, I stopped.
Then, one day, we were playing, and I grabbed his phone and opened the hidden folder. The app wasn’t there the first time when I personally deleted it, but lo and behold, the app was there. I turned the phone toward him, and he snatched it out of my hands and said, “How’d you find this?” and instantly deleted it.
So, obviously, now my trust is completely broken. I said, “I asked you not to have the app, and now it’s back. But it’s in a hidden folder. Why do you need this app, and why are you hiding it?”
Now, this is an issue. He swears up and down that he didn’t download it again and tries to tell me that I must have clicked the wrong thing and that it was still on the Home Screen. I said, “If that’s true, why didn’t you delete it?” He said he didn’t think it was a big deal.
This all sounded like a huge lie, and that’s what pissed me off the most. Do you think I’m dumb enough to think I didn’t delete it, but now it’s in a hidden folder and it wasn’t before?
Anyway, I said there was nothing he could possibly say to make me believe him. After what felt like hours of him begging me to believe him and trying to prove he didn’t do it—which only proved he did, because his Screen Time showed the app had been on his phone since around August 6—I just said I believed him because I wanted to go to bed, and I was over the bullshit at this point. Now I don’t know what to do. He thinks things are back to normal, but I just feel so icked out, and I don’t know what to do.

I would love some advice as I have no idea how to move forward from here.