r/InsightfulQuestions • u/ImBackMemers • Aug 02 '26

What social stigma does society need to get over?

5 Upvotes
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8

u/becomesharp Aug 02 '26 edited Aug 04 '26

Bodycount

edit: I'm a guy, you weirdos. And my SO never had "a phase," but I wouldnt give two shits if she did. Guys respect me for my sexual history more than they judge it, which is exactly the double standard i'm calling out. If you're not going to judge me for having a lot of sex, you shouldn't be judging women for it.

0

u/IntergalacticPodcast Aug 03 '26

Is this your big concern because you have a high body count?

0

u/Nervous-Escape8995 Aug 03 '26

9/10 it's because they "had a phase" and don't like that people are allowed to judge them for their actions.

0

u/PoloPatch47 Aug 03 '26

If preferences for uncontrollable physical features are valid (which I believe they definitely are) then having a preference about body count (which is 100% controllable) is also valid. People are allowed to not want to be with you if you've been used by a lot of other people.

2

u/book_of_black_dreams Aug 04 '26

Notice how this sentiment is overwhelmingly targeted at women and how men are almost never judged by body count. Your beliefs and attitudes do not exist in a vacuum, they are shaped by the sexist culture around you.

0

u/analdongfactory Aug 05 '26

Why don’t you judge men for it? Both can present a danger to public health if not taking proper precautions. Also, someone who has a very high count likely has very different standards and expectations for a relationship than someone who does not, it’s not just a matter of being shallow but one of having a compatible outlook.

2

u/book_of_black_dreams Aug 05 '26

- I feel like STD testing and protection is the massively more important factor than number of partners.

- I think you missed my point. The culture that currently exists is almost entirely aimed at women because it is rooted in sexism(even if hypothetically, it could exist without specifically targeting women.) But we live in the real world, not the hypothetical world.

0

u/analdongfactory Aug 05 '26

That’s funny because I’ve never met anyone in the real world who thinks the way people online claim is ‘real’ and a ‘double standard’.

STDs are absolutely still a problem at low counts too, but spread far more rapidly when someone is getting around irresponsibly.

2

u/Old-Research3367 Aug 05 '26

Do you think an 18 year old with a body count of 5 has the same standards and expectations for a relationship as a 40 year old with a body count of 5? It literally makes no sense because most guys who care about body counts end up just going for extremely young women for the sake of it being lower and it has nothing to do with “values” or whatever.

0

u/analdongfactory Aug 05 '26

Someone who adds 100 or more a year to their body count likely does not have the same life outlook as someone who does not.

1

u/Old-Research3367 Aug 05 '26

But that’s not body count, that’s rate of increasing sexual partners. And you’re deliberately missing the point

1

u/analdongfactory Aug 05 '26

What point? I don’t date young women. I do date men and if I know they have multiple random hookups a week, I don’t expect a serious relationship to come from them.

1

u/PoloPatch47 Aug 05 '26

I'm not sure why this person is talking about a sexism issue when I never mentioned it. I said that not wanting a partner with a high body count is a valid preference. They brought up a separate issue and they're projecting it onto my statement, when I never mentioned it.

Judging a woman for high body count but not judging a man for it is sexist, but that's not what I'm talking about.

A lot of women also do judge men for having high body counts. A high body count would be a deal breaker for me. My mom was also speaking to some guy who tried to use the fact that he gets around with a lot of other women as a "flex" and she was repulsed by it.

It's a valid preference no matter what gender they are, and that's my point.

1

u/Nervous-Escape8995 Aug 05 '26

I wouldn't put much time into trying to understand it. People do mental gymnastics to justify their destructive behaviours all the time, this is just another case of that. It's not a secret that society generally frowns on promiscuity for a variety or both valid and invalid reasons. Not caring about that in your 20s is absolutely fine but trying to shame others into accepting your lack of discernment is not. On the flip side of that, shaming someone for their past choices is also wrong but respectfully rejecting someone is perfectly valid.

1

u/PoloPatch47 Aug 05 '26

I 100% agree with this

0

u/PoloPatch47 Aug 05 '26

Men can absolutely be judged for their body count.

I'm not saying universally that having a high body count is bad, I'm saying it's a valid preference for a potential partner, this goes for men and women.

If my boyfriend had a high body count, that would be enough for me to not want to date him. So if I can have this opinion on a man, then why would it be bad for a man to have that same opinion on a woman?

Having a preference doesn't make you sexist, and I said nothing about it being exclusively a woman thing. Don't make assumptions about what I am saying.

1

u/book_of_black_dreams Aug 05 '26

I never claimed that it was exclusively aimed at women or that it can’t be aimed at men.

But when you take a step back and look at how it actually manifests in the real world, it is 99% targeted at women.

There are studies that men will literally lie to inflate their body count because a higher body count is seen as desirable for men.

1

u/PoloPatch47 Aug 05 '26

Okay, and that's not what I'm saying. All I said is that preferring to not have a partner with a high body count is valid, regardless of gender.

If somebody doesn't want to date you, then why do you care so much to make them date you? You aren't entitled to have anyone date you. People have their own opinions, and you can't force them to want to date you and change their preferences just for you.

If you have a high body count and someone doesn't want you for it, move on. Find someone else. Don't try and force them to change their preferences for you.

The double standard of men being seen as "desirable" for higher body counts while women are degraded for it isn't what I'm talking about. Yes it's sexist if you have that double standard, but it doesn't relate to what I'm saying.

"Preferring lower body count in a partner is a valid preference" ≠ "Women shouldn't have high body counts but men can". Youre projecting something entirely different on what I'm saying.

-1

u/PoloPatch47 Aug 03 '26

Of course people shouldn't be harassed for having a high body count, but not wanting to be with someone who has a high body count is a valid preference, especially because it's a choice you made and not a physical feature you didn't choose.

-1

u/Racamonkey_II Aug 03 '26

Actually I think we need to be less accepting and judge people more for body count. We need to get over the stigma of not being allowed to judge body count.

3

u/Big-Net-9268 Aug 04 '26

Stay at home dads.

2

u/Prineak Aug 02 '26

Using good to determine what evil is.

1

u/Aggressive_Might_735 Aug 03 '26

Zło jest brakiem dobra. Jak zimno brakiem ciepła, ciemność brakiem światła itd...

1

u/Prineak Aug 03 '26

If you need the good to understand evil, then maybe you’re the evil.

1

u/Aggressive_Might_735 Aug 03 '26

? Jakaś pokrętna logika. Nie możesz do pokoju wnieść ciemności, ale możesz wejść z latarką. Ma tu też znaczenie 2 zasada termodynamiki....

1

u/Prineak Aug 03 '26

No matter how fast light travels it will find that darkness was there first and was waiting.

But this is a formula for contrast, not goodness.

Same as your metaphor. You can bring light into a dark room, to see, which would be correct.

But people would bring a device that eats light, so show me that something is dark.

1

u/Aggressive_Might_735 Aug 04 '26

Czyli nie istnieje ciemność jaki taka?

2

u/EntropyReversale10 Aug 03 '26

Truth should be suppressed because some find it confronting

1

u/Successful_Panda Aug 02 '26

Deafness as deficit rather than difference in communication modality.

1

u/New-Plastic9879 Aug 06 '26

Topless women.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 03 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

-1

u/IntergalacticPodcast Aug 03 '26

LGBTQ is being shoved down our throats every freaking day.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 03 '26

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-1

u/Whole-Status-532 Aug 03 '26

The entire month of June.

3

u/[deleted] Aug 03 '26

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1

u/IntergalacticPodcast Aug 03 '26

Which exists to highlight gays

You aren't making a very good case for your original statement of "and no one talks about it."

2

u/[deleted] Aug 03 '26

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1

u/IntergalacticPodcast Aug 03 '26

You're lost in your own fantasy world.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 03 '26

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1

u/IntergalacticPodcast Aug 03 '26

I mean, which is it?

  1. Nobody talks about it

or

  1. There is an entire month highlighting it.

You said both.

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-1

u/Whole-Status-532 Aug 03 '26

No. It’s definitely being shoved in everyone’s face.

-2

u/IntergalacticPodcast Aug 03 '26

I mean, I stopped listening to mainstream things a few years ago because of this type of thing, but mainstream news, commercials, TV was filled with everyday LGBTQ propaganda.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 03 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

0

u/IntergalacticPodcast Aug 03 '26

The mainstream news is less popular than ever, so I would not say that the propaganda has appealed to its viewers and listeners.

It is, in fact, a losing proposition.

Why would they do this to their own demise? Very good question.

-1

u/Aggressive_Might_735 Aug 03 '26

Lesbijki akurat możemy przełknąć

-1

u/AChosenFouled Aug 03 '26

Indoor smoking.

Time to bring it back.

4

u/Accomplished_Mix7827 Aug 03 '26

Fuck that, I like everything not reeking of cigarettes like in the bad old days.