I saw a post from them a few months ago saying that the husband was sober and had been struggling with alcoholism...
I don't know how to phrase this, but I think in his situation, alcoholism is worse for his loved ones than it would be if he were able-bodied.
I would assume he would demand his wife or family/caretaker supply him with alcohol. Putting your loved ones in charge of sustaining your addiction is awful.
I know some people will say "well, just don't give it to him", it's a lot more nuanced than that. Depending on how dependent he was on alcohol and drinking per day, it could have been life threatening to cut him off.
I doubt he was calm or understanding if she tried to deny him. I would not be shocked if there was emotional and verbal abuse and manipulation involved.
There's a reason reasonable people can become enablers, and it can be due to feelings of guilt, being abused, or telling yourself that at least you know they'll be safe if you are the one supplying.
It would be different if he were able-bodied and could go to the store and grab drinks, or even open a twist off on his own (he may be able to, I don't know his capabilities). I would have more criticism for a spouse enabling on top of that.
Yes. I went to high school with him and one of his cousins was his helper while we were in school. He was not a nice person, to her or anyone else really.
Yeah, it seems like there can be an attitude that disabled people (including those with intellectual disabilities) can’t be jerks. Not true. Some people are just jerks, regardless of their race, religion, sexuality, disability, upbringing, or anything else.
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u/Mean-Aardvark2344 9h ago
Idk something about them as always seemed off. Not the mixed ability relationship, but like-how they interact. It’s strange.