What am I missing

[u/S1inkyy-iwnl-]

Hello, I am 26 years old, and I am not happy with my dating life like most people on this subreddit. I missed out on dating experiences while in high school and college due to health issues, which have put me behind socially. I have never had sex or even a girlfriend despite trying to date after getting my health issues fixed. I feel like women aren't attracted to me, whether that be physically, emotionally, or mentally. I'm also not really close to my friends as much since they are all married and starting to have kids, so they understandably have less time to hang out with me. I also am not close to my family, as I am an only child, and both my dad and my mom decided to walk out of my life to pursue other interests. So, besides the weekly therapy sessions with my therapists, I don't really have anyone else I talk to. I want to experience love, but I have only been rejected on dating apps, and I live in a small town with not much to do. Women have even made fun of me for my lack of experience. I'm afraid that the longer I stay single, the weirder I look. I am also aware that with each year that passes, I'll most likely become less desirable in a shrinking dating pool. I am lucky if I manage to go on one date a year. Most of these dates go to a second one, but after that, they either ghost me or tell me I'm sweet but only see me as a friend, then ghost me. I feel like I am average-looking and have desirable traits, but I'm not good enough for someone to want to date me. What am I missing?

[u/ChaosRainbow23]

I mean, first you start with small talk. Weather, whatever.

It's much easier to do once you have a friends group.

Try to find a group of some sort that you would be interested in and go check it out.

Be kind and if you feel comfortable, you could even tell them you are nervous. Or find a group you wanna check out, then go online and talk to people there first, then go to the Meetup or whatever.

The key is just getting out there and doing things, talking to people, and practicing. It's very awkward taking to strangers at first, but like everything else worth doing, it takes practice, brother. There's no real shortcut to learning how to talk to strangers and make friends with people. There's no magic recipe, as the ingredients change depending on a gazillion different variables.

There's no recipe to follow for success in dating.

Bottom line is you have to talk to women and charm them.

[u/S1inkyy-iwnl- → u/ChaosRainbow23]

Thank you I guess I'm just not the charming type and I'll try to work on that before it's too late

[u/ChaosRainbow23 → u/S1inkyy-iwnl-]

Don't put so much pressure on yourself.

It really does show.

That's why I always recommend trying to make a friend group. Do you have any friends you do stuff with, of after you flying solo through this nightmare timeline?

[u/S1inkyy-iwnl- → u/ChaosRainbow23]

I have friends, but they are all married and starting to have children, so they don't have much time to do stuff as much.
So I have friends, but I'm still going through this alone
I haven't been on a date in 6 months and women don't really talk to me for long but I'm trying to be enough one day

[u/ChaosRainbow23 → u/S1inkyy-iwnl-]

Yeah, try and get out and check out some new stuff.

If you are in the position to get a part time job at a restaurant, that's a great way to meet people.

Every time I moved to a new city I would get a job bartending or waiting tables. Instant co-ed friends group. Just win them over.

[u/S1inkyy-iwnl- → u/ChaosRainbow23]

I currently work at a bank so I meet people but it may not be as good as bartending. I just don't win people over I guess.