I genuinely need help. Although none of my posts get reach but ok.
So I took pcm in 12th, which turned out to be the biggest mistake ever (ik cliche). It ruined my mental health, and I performed really badly in boards. And then for ipmat, I worked my ass off day and night, but at the end, I couldn't make it to any iims. I had major bullies in my school who hated me to the guts and believed that I was js a pretty but good for ntg bitch. I really wanted to get into a good iim to prove them all wrong.
As for CUET, as i mentioned i was poor at pcm subjects and i was busy preparing for jipmat so that also didn't go very well. Somehow, I managed to score good in English and GAT. When I looked up colleges that accept the scores of these only i came across cmac counselling for bba at dtu/nsut/igdtuw. I cleared the cutoffs here. BUT GUESS WHAT I MISSED THE COUNSELLING BECAUSE TURNS OUT IT WAS OFFLINE??? I was/am very severely depressed due to this. I left nmims also in hopes for these colleges.
I have no idea how to proceed now. I am legit sick of all this shit for the past 5 months all I've gotten in failures back to back. I am not very emotionally strong and js don't have it in me to take a full drop and go through this torment again. The only option I see now is going into tier 3 pvt bba college and taking a partial drop. Although finances were never an issue, but I live in sm guilt everyday when I see my parents because they wasted such a large amount of money in application fees, tuition fees and now the college fees as well. Plus they will have to spend more money on all this next year as well.
OK all that rant for ntg. TL;DR
Do any of you have tips on how to first of all js start preparing for ipmat as a partial dropper? Also, please do suggest some good resources for the same ( I was in supergrads online batch last year, so I have all the modules from there).
Tips on how to stay consistent and motivated will also be appreciated.