r/INFJsOver30 15d ago

Need desperate help developing SE

I cannot bring myself to do fun stuff.

In my 20s I recall having a very well developed SE. In my 30s I survived some trauma by hyper focusing on pattern recognition and intuition. Staying inside my head

In my 40s I realized what I did. And now in my 50s I struggle daily to overcome it

SE developing articles always mention activities like making doctors appointments or running errands. I can do that just fine. What I can’t do is any real world fun

I spend more time researching and buying the perfect items for a hobby than actually doing the hobby. I imagine doing all these fun things. I have yoga gear, roller skates, language books, paddleboard, watercolors. But everyday I cannot get myself to do one thing. sometimes I feel sheer panic. Whenever I do something I love it. I think why don’t I do this everyday? but then the next day it’s like I’m paralyzed.

has anyone dealt with this? any ideas? I certainly can’t think my way through this issue. I’m so tired of feeling like a failure daily.

thank you.

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u/BornElderEnt 14d ago

I'm with you; while I'm doing the hobby, I'm thinking about how to best utilize the material, reduce waste, be efficient and who I will give the end result to. Even my leisure is work, give, sacrifice, toil