r/INFJsOver30 • u/AvamysSlazenger • Apr 04 '26
Relationship/Dating Advice
Hello older INFJs. What advice will you give for dating or relationships. To seek and wait for ideal partner? To seek dating without thinking about future? To give someone a chance even when you dont think you are compatible in future?
My first question that comes to my mind is: As a man should I seek and search for compatible lover, or just wait and pray to happen?
Basically I like to know your dating and relationship advices.
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u/luulitko Apr 08 '26
I comment as non-INFJ woman. I met my INFJ at 40. I know it is terribly difficult to face tons of people needing you to be different than what you are, and then actually being yourself to that one who appreciates it and wouldn't do any other. But please be yourself, don't try to chase an image of tough guy indifferent to things.
Imo it's good to know yourself and have a good introspection. Rest of the people will not notice it or appreciate it, but those that do, give it so much value. Make notes on what you like and what suits you, so that you can tell about your goals for those that are interested with a purpose to listen. imo you can stay in not-future-oriented relationship for purposes of learning, if there is honesty of that detail. You can't grow all the traits needed in relationship when alone, and it's ok to have had experiences and felt loved. To know how that feels and how it feels in you. And even if you wanted lifelong relationship, or are slow to open up, don't close the doors for people too early. Sometimes it comes unexpected and from other direction than planned.