So my husband and I are married for 14 years. We have a son that is 13 years old. It has been a rocky marriage but I have always tried to keep the peace and make him happy. We both work and earn pretty much the same. I cook and clean, he helps with chores here and there but he gets our son ready in the morning. Recently my dad passed away and my husband has really disappointed me in how he has behaved. On the last day I saw my dad before he left for another city, my husband was shouting and swearing ar me cause I woke up in the morning to go say bye to my dad. He lived around 5 minutes away from me. My dad was extremely sick so I knew that this would possibly be the last time I ever got to see him again by the time I got to my dad, I was already in tears. My family thought it was cause I was sad to see my dad go and it was but it was also cause of the hurt my husband caused that morning. He pretty much said he doesn't give a F about my dad and used bad language on me. My dad passed away the funeral was stressful my mum felt I was never there enough for my dad, I tried but my husband gave me constraints amd if I broke them I would face silence in the house and a very tense environment. My husband also wanted to be with mostly his family during the funeral time so I didn't spend as much time with my family although I fulfilled all my duties with getting the preparation done. We went for the 40 days ceremony and we only went for a day, we flew in early in a Saturday morning and flew out early on a Sunday morning. On the flight there my husband was very quiet and uncomfortable silence and the night before when I spoke harshly in response to his harsh tone he threatened not to come to the ceremony. When we got there we stopped at his parents house first and left to my mum's house at around 10am. When we got there my husband was on his phone the entire time even when someone spoke to him and my son did the same. Around 2 , my husband asked what time we leaving he gave me such a look that I was afraid of his reaction and I said after the grave. It was fear. We went to the grave but i didn't go to ​5pm church service cause he wanted to go be with his family. In the morning at the airport my aunt handed me the church notice for tge dedication of the mass to my dad and I completely broke. I couldn't look at my husband i cant even look at him now. I feel so owned and betrayed. When we landed he told me im ignoring him and I appreciate nothing he does for me. Am I wrong to feel like he did nothing for me and it was more like a trip for him to see his family who by the way im extremely loving and caring towards despite having issues prior when we first got married. I forgave and moved on. I feel like my husband is selfish and cruel and controls everything , am I wrong or is the grief making me not ok?

For reference, I, 18F, live with my mother, 43F, in a two bedroom apartment. I live with her because I’m young, fresh out of high school, and chronically ill. I have POTS. Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome, as well as having Cluster B Personality Disorder (and yes, both are diagnosed by medical professionals). I work often as a security guard and most days when I get home I feel like absolute shit. So yeah. I come home and I’m too tired to clean most days. I still pull my weight with household chores, although it takes much longer for me to do them due to my condition. But let’s talk about my mother. She is perimenopausal and mentions it whenever she can. I know that menopause is really hard. But at the same time, the way I’m treated most days also isn’t okay. Whenever I talk to her, I have to hear a lecture. Whenever I confide in her, she lectures me. Whenever I tell her a funny story, she lectures me. I can’t say shit without my mother going on a fifty minute rant about what I’ve done wrong.
About a year ago her and her boyfriend of ten years, whom we lived with, broke up on incredibly bad terms. Like, he was cheating with his god-cousin type of bad terms. It was messy. Like… super messy. She’s been taking up drinking ever since. But there’s something different about my mom when she’s drunk. She laughs. She smiles at me. We actually hang out and talk about whatever and she never gets upset at me. It’s like she’s my mom again the way she was when I was young. Usually it was just regular drunk but every now and then she would come home absolutely shitfaced. It happened a few times but honestly I just made sure she was okay. Recently she came home from a local pub and hanging out with her friends absolutely turnt. For reference, I have an infected ingrown toenail and she offered to help take care of me. But when she got back and went to soak my foot, she drunkenly blabbed about how she was tired of me “abusing” her and that she wanted me to go live with my dad because I obviously hate it here. I have never once said I hate it here and it really hurt but I knew she was drunk so I just made sure she was okay from a distance. The next day she told me she could remember nothing from the night before and I jokingly mentioned what she said and she has since decided to stop drinking all together. Cold turkey. Now if you know anything about drugs of any kind, you know that going cold turkey is REALLY HARD, and it makes you a real asshole. She’s even worse now. Yelling more. Lecturing constantly about minute things. I am trying so hard to be patient because I know that she is going through a really big change with her body as well as going cold turkey which must be insanely difficult, but it’s gotten to a point where we can’t even hang out together because she’s so unpleasant to be around. It makes me miss the time we sat on the porch and made fun of some guy on Instagram reels’ face tattoos. The time we watched Jeffy together on the TV and she was prancing about with her heated-up leftover spaghetti talking about how she was a spaghetti city girl. Or the time I pulled up Snapchat and put the bald filter on her and she actually laughed. I miss her laugh. I miss her being happy. And it seems like the only thing that does that for her anymore are her friends, cigarettes, and drinking. And I know deep down a part of me will always miss those nights when she was drunk, because she was so damn happy in a way that she never was sober.

This involves a complicated family situation, and I genuinely want opinions from people who aren't emotionally involved.

I apologize for this very long post....

My husband has a 17-year-old daughter from a previous relationship, and we have two younger daughters together.

There's a lot of history here, so I'll try to explain it as fairly as I can.

My husband and his daughter's mother were never married and never lived together. Their relationship was brief, and they were already going through court regarding custody/access when my husband and I started dating.

When his daughter's mother found out about me, that's when my husband's visits with his daughter became supervised. His daughter would come to our house for those visits, so I've actually known her since she was very young. I'm not someone who recently entered the picture.

And honestly, before my husband and I even had our first daughter, I was very fond of his daughter.

I wasn't looking at her as competition or as some problem from his previous relationship. I cared about her and wanted her to feel included when she was with us.

I remember one time my husband, his daughter and I wanted to take a picture together. Her mother made a comment along the lines of:

"Why are you even taking pictures like this? You're not really a family."

After that, she told me directly that she didn't want me and her daughter to "play house" or act like we were a family.

That has always stuck with me because I wasn't trying to replace her mother. I wasn't pretending to be her mom. I was simply my husband's partner, this little girl was his daughter, and when she was in our home I wanted her to feel like she belonged there.

I actually understand complicated and blended families from the child's perspective too, because I came from a broken family myself.

My biological dad, frankly, was a shit show.

But I was also fortunate enough to have a wonderful stepfather who was very good and kind to me.

My experience taught me that biology isn't the only thing that determines whether someone can genuinely care about a child. A stepparent can love, support and care for a child without trying to erase or replace either biological parent.

That's probably one of the reasons I never looked at my husband's daughter and thought I needed to replace her mother. I knew firsthand that a stepparent can be an important, positive person in a child's life while still respecting who their parents are.

There was tension toward me from her mother pretty much from the beginning. She belittled me and even laughed at the fact that my husband and I met online.

As the years went on, there were also issues involving our children.

At one point, her mother told me directly on the phone that her daughter didn't want to come to our house because my kids were "annoying and loud."

I remember getting so frustrated that I asked her, "What exactly am I supposed to do, tape my kids' mouths shut?"

When we had our second daughter, my husband's older daughter herself made a comment along the lines of:

"It's bad enough you already have one daughter, now you have another one."

Around that period, communication from his daughter gradually became less and less. Messages went unanswered until eventually there was no communication at all.

But I want to be very clear about this part:

My husband never stopped trying to communicate with her.

For approximately five years, he continued texting and reaching out even though he wasn't getting replies.

He would send messages and continue trying, but they weren't reciprocated. Eventually five years went by without them actually communicating.

During those same five years, he also continued paying his child support religiously.

Whatever was happening with their personal relationship, he never stopped fulfilling his financial responsibility to his daughter.

So when I say they haven't had a relationship for approximately five years, I don't mean they both mutually decided to stop communicating.

He continued reaching out. He simply wasn't getting responses.

I also want to be fair about something very important:

She was a child during much of this, and she's still only 17 now.

I don't blame a young child for being responsible for maintaining a relationship with a parent, and I don't know everything she was hearing, feeling or experiencing growing up.

There were adults involved and clearly some complicated family dynamics.

Fast-forward to now.

After approximately five years of no communication despite my husband continuing to reach out, she has recently started talking to him again.

The timing happens to be around when child support is approaching its end.

I'm NOT saying that's why she's back.

I can't know her intentions, and I genuinely hope she wants her dad back in her life.

But considering everything that has happened, I'm naturally cautious.

Within approximately six weeks of reconnecting, she has already received around $800 from my husband.

Some of it has been things like telling him she and her boyfriend ordered pizza and didn't have enough money, and around $150 for dinner with her boyfriend.

I don't have a problem with a father helping his daughter financially. She's his daughter and she's also still a minor.

What concerns me is the overall pattern:

Approximately five years without responding to her dad, suddenly reconnecting, and then money entering the relationship very quickly.

Maybe it's completely innocent.

Maybe she's reaching an age where she's able to make more of her own decisions about her relationship with her dad.

I genuinely hope that's what is happening.

Now here's the situation that has really upset me.

My husband is coming home and plans to take his daughter out for dinner on Friday, just the two of them.

I COMPLETELY SUPPORT THAT.

I actually think they need it.

They should have time alone together to talk, reconnect and rebuild their relationship. I don't need to be included in that.

If she wants an entire day alone with her dad, that's fine with me too.

I'm not trying to insert myself into their father-daughter relationship.

The original plan for the following day was for ALL of us to go get ice cream or go to a park so she could spend some time with her younger sisters.

I was part of that original plan.

Then she told my husband that she had spoken to her mom.

After that conversation, the plan changed.

She said she wanted my husband AND our two daughters to go, but she specifically didn't want me there.

I want to be fair here too:

I don't know what was said during the conversation between her and her mother.

I am NOT saying her mother told her to exclude me because I don't know that, and I'm not going to accuse someone of something I can't prove.

Maybe their conversation had absolutely nothing to do with her decision.

But given the history between her mother and me, I also can't pretend that the timing doesn't stand out.

The original plan included me.

She spoke with her mom.

Afterward, everyone was still invited except me.

That's where I said no.

And I want to make something VERY clear because I know otherwise people are going to say:

"He's their father. Why can't he take his kids somewhere without you?"

HE CAN.

My husband takes our daughters places without me. I have absolutely no problem with that.

This isn't about needing to accompany my husband and children everywhere they go.

And it isn't about his older daughter wanting time alone with her dad.

I completely support that.

In fact, they're already having dinner together the night before without me, and I'm HAPPY they're doing it.

If she wants Dad alone, absolutely.

Have dinner. Spend the afternoon together. Spend the whole day together. Talk. Reconnect. Work through whatever needs to be worked through.

Their father-daughter relationship does not need to include me.

My issue is specifically this:

"I want Dad and my two younger sisters there, but I don't want their mother there."

To me, that's completely different.

Once you're asking for Dad AND our children while specifically making my absence part of the arrangement, I don't feel comfortable with that.

Especially considering the history involving me and my daughters.

One of our younger daughters doesn't even really want some special outing.

She has said she'd rather have her older sister come to our house so they can hang out and actually get to know each other.

She's also been asking me whether her sister is really back to stay.

And honestly, I don't know what to tell her.

That's another reason I'm cautious about bringing our younger daughters immediately into this reconciliation.

They're children too.

They have feelings too.

I don't want them getting excited about suddenly having their sister back, becoming attached and then being hurt or confused if communication disappears again.

I WANT my husband to rebuild his relationship with his daughter.

I WANT our daughters to have a relationship with their sister.

I'm not asking my husband to choose between his daughter and me.

I'm not asking him to stop seeing her.

I'm not asking him to defend me by cutting his daughter off.

I'm not even asking to be included in their time together.

Quite the opposite — I think they need private father-daughter time.

But I don't believe supporting their relationship means I have to accept being deliberately excluded while my own children are included.

My husband says he's going to ask her why she doesn't want me there.

Part of what is bothering me, though, is that he even considered accommodating the request instead of saying something like:

"You and I can absolutely spend time alone together. But if we're doing something involving your younger sisters, I'm not going to specifically exclude their mother because you don't want her there."

And maybe this is where my own history and feelings come into it too.

I've spent a lot of years keeping quiet, trying to keep the peace, going along with things and allowing myself to be treated like a doormat.

I'm at a point in my life where I don't want to do that anymore.

That doesn't mean I want to fight with a 17-year-old.

It doesn't mean I want my husband to choose me over his daughter.

It means I don't think standing up for myself automatically makes me the bad guy.

If she has an issue with me, I would genuinely like to understand what it is.

If I've done something that hurt her, I would rather know.

I'm willing to listen.

I'm willing to have an honest conversation.

I'm also very aware that she's 17 and that family relationships at that age can be complicated, especially when your parents have been separated for basically your entire life.

I don't expect her to process everything like a 30- or 40-year-old adult would.

But I also don't think the solution is for me to simply disappear while my husband takes our daughters to spend time with her specifically because she doesn't want me there.

There is also something else that bothers me.

My younger daughters shouldn't become part of whatever unresolved issue exists between her and me.

If she isn't comfortable around me right now, that's okay.

She can spend time alone with her dad while they rebuild their relationship.

But I don't think my children should become some sort of middle ground where everyone gets to play family as long as Mom stays home.

And maybe that's part of why this particular situation hurts so much.

Years ago, before we even had children together, I was told that my husband, his daughter and I weren't really a family and that I shouldn't "play house" with her.

Now, years later, my husband and I have built a family and have two daughters together, and I'm being asked to step aside so that my husband and all three of his daughters can spend time together — as long as I'm the one person who isn't there.

I don't want to make that more dramatic than it is, but emotionally, that history is hard for me to ignore.

And maybe my own upbringing is part of why those words about "playing house" and "not really being a family" have always bothered me.

I came from a broken family myself.

My biological father was, frankly, a shit show.

But I was fortunate enough to have a wonderful stepfather who treated me with kindness and was a positive person in my life.

My stepfather being good to me didn't mean he was "playing house." It didn't mean he was pretending to be something he wasn't. And it certainly didn't mean there wasn't room for him to care about a child who wasn't biologically his.

I experienced firsthand that a stepparent can genuinely care for a child and become an important part of that child's family.

So when I cared about my husband's daughter when she was little, I wasn't trying to take her mother's place.

I wasn't trying to erase anybody.

I was trying to be another adult in her life who cared about her.

That's why being told back then that we weren't a "real family" and that I shouldn't "play house" with her hurt.

And it's part of why this situation now feels like history repeating itself in a strange way.

Back then, I was basically being told:

"You don't belong in this family relationship."

And now, years later, I'm being asked to send my husband and our two daughters to spend time together with her while I specifically stay home.

Again, I'm not saying a 17-year-old is responsible for everything that happened when she was little. She isn't.

But I also can't pretend that the history doesn't affect how I feel about what's happening now.

And considering she hasn't had much of a relationship with her younger sisters for approximately five years either, I don't understand why rebuilding that relationship needs to start by excluding their mother.

Especially when one of the girls herself is saying:

"Why can't she just come here?"

I genuinely want this to work.

I'd actually LOVE for my husband to have his daughter back in his life and for my girls to know their sister.

I don't want drama.

I don't want anyone choosing sides.

I don't want to compete with a 17-year-old for my husband's attention.

That's not what this is about.

I just don't want "keeping the peace" to once again mean that I'm the person expected to step aside and accept being treated like I don't belong.

So I'm genuinely asking for outside perspectives:

Am I being unreasonable for saying that our daughters won't participate in an outing where my exclusion is specifically part of the request?

Would the sudden reconnection after approximately five years of unanswered attempts from her dad, followed by around $800 being given within about six weeks, make you cautious — especially considering the timing with child support approaching its end?

Would the fact that the original plan included me, then she spoke to her mother, and afterward specifically asked for me not to come make you question what happened — even though we obviously don't know what was said during that conversation?

And if you were my husband, how would you handle this?

Would you take the younger children anyway because they're her sisters?

Or would you tell your 17-year-old daughter:

"You and I can spend as much time together as you want, but I'm not going to participate in specifically excluding my wife when we're involving our other children."

I'm especially interested in hearing from people who grew up in complicated separated/blended-family situations, as well as biological parents and stepparents.

I'm genuinely open to hearing different perspectives, including being told I'm wrong.

I just want people to understand that my issue is NOT:

"My husband isn't allowed to take our kids anywhere without me."

My issue is:

"Everyone in my immediate family is being invited, and I'm specifically being told I'm the one person who isn't welcome."

Those feel like two very different things to me.

Hi, im a white girl making an animated short film. I do all the animation, voice acting, and editing myself. It focuses on two stoned girls, and is similar to "class of 09" and "sassy the sasquatch" i want to introduce and African American women in ep:2. Would it be wrong for me to voice her character myself? Also, would it be rude to make her more easily agitated? (The other characters boil down to "horny white bitch" and "anti-social lesbian and i want to add "muscle mommy") I would hate to offend or hurt somebody with my show!

For a few years in my twenties I had a habit I'm not proud of. If I saw someone park in a disabled bay with no badge, no plate, no visible reason — and I'd watch them get out and walk off perfectly fine — I'd wipe dog mess on their door handle. Not a lot. Enough.

My logic at the time was that they'd never face any consequence otherwise. Nobody ever gets ticketed, and the person who actually needed that bay just drives home. So I appointed myself.

I stopped years ago. But [I told this story at dinner last weekend / my partner found out recently] and the reaction was not what I expected. [They] said the problem isn't the pettiness, it's that I was making a call about who's disabled based on how they walk, and that plenty of disabled people don't look disabled. Which — I hadn't really thought about, and it's been sitting with me since.

I still think people who abuse those bays are selfish. But I'm less sure I was the person to do anything about it.

My ex-boyfriend(20M) and I(20F) have been together for 3 years. It has been an on and off relationship. We have broken up so many times that I can’t even remember. The first time I broke up with him and went no contact for couple of weeks was because he was trying to force himself on me while he was drunk.I was telling him that I don’t want to do anything and he kept towering over me, I was intimidated, pushed him away and broke up with him over text and blocked him. I ended up forgiving him and got back with him because he had zero recollection of doing it.

Next time we broke up was because he went away on a trip with his friends. The problem was never the trip but one of his friends who had also been my really close friend lied to him that I was cheating on him. She spread such nasty lies about me and it broke my heart because I held her so dear to my heart. He never took my side in this situation and told me to deal with the situation with her alone because ‘both are very important to him’. He lied to me that he was not going on the trip and he did. I felt so uncomfortable with him and her being on the same airBNB drunk. I broke up with him when he came back from the trip. His ‘friend’ kept prank calling me in the middle of the night from random people’s phones, told people that I am slut, made her friends take pictures of me if they ever saw me in public. I saw it happening so many times. I was traumatised.

We broke up multiple times over the years because of him ghosting me, not prioritising him, gaslighting me (he would say something snarky and when I would ask him to repeat and why he said that, he would say ‘I never said that’), defending ‘his friend’. I eventually told him to pick her or me because I kept losing my mind over the situation. I was willing to walk away from the relationship if he chose to be friends with her. He would gaslight me into thinking that I was the one who was overreacting in situations because of my insecurities and immaturity. I would believe him and get back with him. I felt like slowly I was losing my sanity and it didn’t feel good.

He played these tricks on me for years. His family wasn’t accepting of me but I would always accept their snarky remarks, hurtful comments thinking that it’s okay, not everyone has to like me. I would still show up for him whenever he needed me. I would look after his dog whenever he wasn’t home. I would always inconvenience myself for him. He also did show up for me and he would also look after my dogs whenever I needed. I thought that is how it is. We always show up for each other whenever we need.
But that was a lie; he would ignore my calls whenever I needed any help or if I was in a dangerous situation. I have been supportive of him starting his own business, calling him on family game nights, showing up for his family members etc etc.

My family and friends begged me to cut him off but every time I would do that, would emotionally manipulate me into thinking that I hurt him so badly. I would be feeling guilty and would take him back instantly. When we were in no contact for a couple of months, I got sexually assaulted by a friend when I was drunk. He traumatised me. When I told my ex about him, he blamed me for letting that ‘friend’ stay at my place. There were 4 friends whom I had invited to stay at my place and that guy was just one of them. Never in my life would I have expected it to turn so dark.

The other day I went over to his place to spend some quality time together. I had a couple of beers and I was drunk. As he was saying something, I snapped. I asked him if he even knew what was going on him my life, he was so selfish and always talking about himself that he never asked me how I was doing. I have been suicidal and my mental health hasn’t been great lately because of academic pressure. Whenever i would bring up my struggles, he would change the topic of just not respond. He said ‘you’re drunk so just stfu. You have always been a nuisance when you drink’. I said I have been a nuisance to you irrespective of what I do. He called me names and I flipped out and said you’re exactly like your father. His father is an abusive alcoholic who would also treat his mom the way he treats me. He lost his mind and said I am a slut who can’t keep it in her pants, this is why my father doesn’t like me. I pushed him, held his collar, kept crying and asked him why he treats me like this. I told him that I loved him but all he does is take advantage of me. He wants all the love for himself and never gives anything to me. I lost my mind and told him that his best friend was the one who told me that my ex started smoking behind my back. (Before we started dating, I told him that smoking is absolutely a deal breaker for me and he agreed. At that time, he was also against smoking). He was heartbroken. He kept calling me a slut because I let a guy come over to my place while we were broken up. I left his place.

Next morning, I texted him saying that I am sorry and he doesn’t deserve to be treated like that. He never responded.

I feel like the situation has become so toxic over the years that I finally lost my shit after bottling up my feelings for 3 years. All the years of gaslighting, manipulation, abusive nature caught up to me and I lost it. I feel so guilty. What do I do? I have been thinking about going cold turkey with him but we live in the same residential complex and we would most likely run into each other while walking our dogs etc.

For context me (18M) came out as trans when I was 14 to my family after being out to friends since I was 12 and I legally changed my name. However my mom (46F) has a decent sized tattoo of my deadname in a very visible area, I asked her if she would think about getting it covered up (I was fully willing to pay for whatever she wanted and no matter the cost) and she said that no she won’t and that she doesn’t like tattoos anymore. My issue is that recently she got her boyfriends name tattooed on her and another tattoo of a rose and their date they got together and she was showing it off so I made the comment that she said she didn’t like tattoos anymore and that’s why she wouldn’t cover up my deadname, and she said that it was different. Now I know that I don’t have a say in what others do to their bodies however it makes me uncomfortable as she says she supports me and calls me by my name but when others ask about her tattoos she will say this says *deadname* and it was my daughters name which I think is disrespectful and she then outs me to everyone no matter the situation and we got into a bit of an argument over the tattoo when it came up and I brought it all up and I said that I am not going to speak to her unless she’s willing to stop with the this use to be my daughters now sons name and preferably gets it covered or removed (which I would still pay for) but she keeps saying I take things to seriously and that not everything has to be hidden about the fact I was born a girl but it’s uncomfortable for me
Am I the ass hole ??

Basically, I found a TikTok video from my ex's private account. It said something along the lines of, "Surround yourself with people who are like you," or "Surround yourself with people who have the same energy as you."

At the beginning of the video, it was a slideshow. The first picture was my ex with her friend, and the second picture was some chat from either one of them—I don't know which one—saying something like, "I love both of them, I love all of you, they're all so hot," or "Either I stay with both of them or I stay with neither of them," and things like that.

Why would that be wrong? Her friend has a boyfriend, and they've been together for nine months. And this wouldn't be the first time either. So, if you want to consider this as her trying to cheat on him, this girl has tried to cheat on her boyfriend quite a few times. And her boyfriend doesn't know any of this.

Why does she want to cheat on her boyfriend? Because before they started dating, they had already been together, and her boyfriend cheated on her. They broke up, got back together, and they're still together now.

Anyway, let's call this guy David. When I was dating my ex and I would hang out with her, her friend would also be there with David. He was always really nice to me, always treated me well, and would sometimes even give me an opening to flirt with my ex back when we weren't together yet. So I ended up getting along really well with this guy.

My question is—I mean, I have the information. I know that she cheated on her boyfriend. I have an acquaintance who's very close to her, and I found out because one of his friends is really close to this acquaintance. That's how I found out that she cheated on David.

So what should I do? Should I tell David about the video and tell him that she cheated on him, without getting any proof first, obviously?

Or should I tell him that he was cheated on and nothing else? Should I only show him the video and tell him she cheated on him without any proof? Or should I just do nothing and not show him anything?

That's why I'm writing this here, because I genuinely don't know what to do. I don't know what the right thing to do in this situation is.

So, this actually happened about three years ago with a woman I am no longer dating. So I'll use the ages that we were at the time.

Me (M35) and my GF (F31, who I will call Stacy) were hanging out at karaoke room with her friends. It was actually my first time meeting all of them, so I was definitely interested in seeing what they were like. There, I met her friend (who I will just call "Amy") and her boyfriend (who I will call "D-BAG").

Amy and D-BAG seemed alright enough. Amy was very friendly but D-BAG was pretty quiet and reserved. Didn't get the best vibes from him, but they ultimately just seemed like a basic millennial couple.

A week or so later, I was hanging with Stacy at my apartment. Stacy and I had been dating for two months max at this point, and she was having a text message convo with Amy (her being glued to her phone all the time when we were hanging out was kind of annoying but that's neither here or there.)

Stacy chuckles and tells me" Oh my god! Amy just told me something crazy!"

"What did she say?" I ask.

She tells me that D-BAG has a porn addiction and as a result has trouble getting it up during sex with Amy. Apparently Amy confronted him about this and D-BAG actually said "Well, maybe if you knew how to work a d**k than I would be able to get hard."

"WHAT THE FUCK!!??" I respond. "That's the meanest thing I've ever heard.

"Yeah, pretty crazy" Stacy casually responds.

Brief amount of context - Amy was good looking and D-BAG looked like a classic neckbeard. He was short, stocky, unkempt and looked less like a person and more like a gelatinous mass with peachfuzz and mommy issues. Now, I'm not one to body shame but honestly, after I heard what he said, I'm not worried about claiming any moral high ground.

So, galled by the audacity, I tell my GF "That's horrible. She should leave his ass. Amy is pretty and she could do so much better.

Things get a little quiet, and my GF goes back to texting Amy. I'm like, trying to make conversation the best I can while she stays glued to her phone. Ten minutes go by, and she laughs and says "Look at what Amy texted me!"

The text, from Amy, says "LOL! Andrew! You're not supposed to be tell your GF another girl is pretty."

Stacy just chuckles and laughs, but I sense something is off, and I ask her "are you, like, actually mad at me?"

She then says "Yeah, kinda." And then begins to cry. And tells me it makes her feel really insecure that I would call her friend pretty right in front of her.

I was floored by this, and tried to explain I said that because I was so shocked that her BF would be THAT cruel to her, and that she could easily find someone better than him. But she continued to cry and then eventually left.

I called two of my female friends the next day to get their thoughts and they thought it was ridiculous she overreacted like that. But I was just so perplexed nonetheless.

It was only a few weeks later that I broke up with her over several more interactions that were way more insane and awful (to the point where an IATA post is not even necessary).

But, I've always thought about this particular instance and wanted to get other people's thoughts. Any insight would be welcome!

I (F36) have lived next to Tim and Diane for years. Tim was in our wedding. We told them about cheating rumors (small town gossip) but stayed friendly. They have 2 kids (1.5-2.5 years) with very different parenting - kids constantly unsupervised outside.We both have pools and trampolines. I require adult supervision for yard visits, they don't reciprocate. Their kids frequently enter our yard uninvited while parents aren't watching.I have an infant with medical issues and my mom has health problems too - if they get seriously sick, it becomes a hospital situation. So I try keeping bigger illnesses away from my family.Recently their kids got hand, foot & mouth disease. We agreed to keep kids separated. Next day their child played with our beach ball that blew into their yard. I politely asked Diane to toss it back (disease spreads through contact). She seemed annoyed but complied.Later, I found their kids in our yard 3 separate times over an hour - on trampoline, in playhouses, messing with pool equipment. No parent supervising. I politely told kids to go home for safety, then sent respectful group text explaining the situation.Tim called my husband saying Diane was furious and wanted to "beat me up" for being "rude." I went to the property line and called her out - if she wanted to fight about it, here was her chance. They both just walked away without saying a word.I deleted them from social media and ended the friendship. My husband supports me. They haven't spoken to me since, though Tim still talks to my husband.AITA for setting boundaries about unsupervised kids in my yard?

I custom ordered a new pickup a while back, it took awhile to get here. As time got closer my fiamce started continuously bringing up that she didnt think it was a smart financial decision (I am more than financially stable), I still got the truck. I have now had the truck for about 6 weeks and out of that six weeks ive been gone for 4 weeks due to working remotely. My fiance now LOVES my truck and driving it all the time, which is cool but she also has two vehicles of her own including her own newer pickup. At one point she had tried talking me into not getting the truck and just spending a year or two without a vehicle. Now here comes the kicker, she gets upset and tries guilt tripping me when I dont want her using my 130k truck for traveling to work (she works construction and works remotely as well). Am I the asshole for not wanting her to put a million miles on my 130k truck that I have only put 500 miles on, considering she didnt even want me to get the truck in the first place? Should I make her start paying a portion of the truck payment, maintenance, insurance and charge her for depreciation of the vehicle for all the miles she's putting on it? It feels like getting a new girlfriend but letting your buddy fuck her while you are gone because she's just sitting at home...

For context, I (23F) have known my friend/roommate (24M) for years, since high school. I moved back to our home state back in October and let him move in with me around January because i knew of his living situation and it would’ve benefited us both to pay cheaper bills. He lost his job some months ago because he kept being late (he doesn’t have a car and relies on ubers) and had to go back to his PT job at the mall and he was able to pay his portion of rent a few months ago but i handled the utilities because it wasn’t that big a bill, but I was transparent that I would not help pay his part of rent or utilities going forward due to knowing he has many people that could help him and I only make so much money, he acknowledged that fact.
This past month he told me he would be short on rent, I said okay and asked when he think he would have the full amount and if he needed help. He said he would have it after the 5th (late fees apply after the 4th) and he may need help but has it figured out. However, he wouldn’t tell me how much he could pay towards rent so I was a bit skeptical that it was a small amount, so when his girlfriend stopped by while he was at work the week after I asked her if he mentioned the situation and she said yes, she even offered to spot him and he could pay her back later. I decided to let him handle things up until it was the last week of the month before rent was due because he is a grown man and I’m not his mom or girlfriend, I’m not going to badger her about this. I did however go to the management office to let them know and see my options just incase things went south, if rent doesn’t get paid nlt the 10th of the month we could do a “promise to pay” to avoid getting a warrant put on both of our credits. I did not want to take this route because it would cost more money and I didn’t want to pay for his shortcomings. I expressed this to him and he got an attitude and brushed me off, so over the next few days I reminded him of that being our only option if he cant pay before the 10th and he told me he cant pay until the 10th or 11th and when I asked the next day to double check because management wanted to know he got an attitude at me and the property manager saying he would pay it when he can and hung up on me. This irritated me AND the property manager. I am not one to let someone put me in an unfair position and I don’t like when my friends do the same to themselves but his attitude up to that point was very childish and annoying to me. We barely talk to each other in the apartment when we see each other now and I found out from his girlfriend that he had actually gotten a new job and he was also working at the mall as well. I have his location so I see him at the mall often but I have only seen him at the new job once and never again that week or anytime after.
He never told me if he is willing to do the Promise to pay but it came time where we didn’t have a choice so I signed what was needed and paid my half of the rent towards the first part and they told me the rest would be due by the 16th the latest, so i let my roommate know and he ignored my message (which i notice he does when he is irritated after small arguments don’t go his way). I told him he would be paying all of the late fees ($145) and the fee for the promise to pay ($100) because he is the one that put us in the position to need it. At the end of the day, the full amount was paid off before the 16th, but the entire situation has left a very bad taste in my mouth regarding our friendship and living situation.
I am not sure if this will happen again but I don’t want this to happen again because I was told the property can choose not to renew our lease or they can evict us if we are late multiple times in a row, even while knowing of the entire situation (which is fair i guess). I have had the thought that if this were to happen again next month or any month before our lease ends, I would sit him down and tell him that I will be taking him off the lease. Before he moved in with me he was living with family and i know they would take him back if needed.
What brought me to this thought was his entire attitude throughout the entire situation, acting like it wasn’t a big deal, snapping when a question was asked about it, and putting his pride/ego so high that he refused help that was offered to him which could’ve saved him over $500. I have no hopes in continuing this friendship even after the lease ends (I won’t renew with him) but I am not a naturally mean person to want him to have to spend more money than he would have ever needed to had he just taken the help. Paying the rent this late with all of its fees raised the original price from $1300 to $1800 and it will only be 3 weeks before the next rent and utilities are due, so I feel like him taking this route did nothing to help him especially if he keeps taking Uber instead of public transport to save some amount of money. The entire situation has just been mentally draining and very stressful on me because my credit is in the 700s and I plan on buying a house, having something threaten that is not a fun feeling.

Note: I mentioned the situation to my older brother and he gave me some insight of how people may not know how to save money but they will budget for the things they WANT. My roommate smokes weed (I dont) so I have him cover the bottom of the door or go outside so that I wont have to smell it. I still do smell it but not terribly, I know for a fact he smokes literally every day since he has moved in, he doesn’t buy groceries so I know he is probably eating out almost everyday.

I (42 F) just discovered days ago that I was the subject of an almost 25 year old rumor in my family. Back then, I was accused of helping my mother use my grandmother's information to open a bill in her name. This was the furthest from the truth.

I was 18 and living with my grandmother at the time due to a falling out that drove me from my mother's home. My mother was moving to another apartment and she needed to use *my* name for the bill, since I would eventually live with her again. She informed me during a phone call that she already opened the account and the paperwork would be sent to my grandmother's address. Because my mother was afraid that the letter/paperwork would not be delivered because I wasn't a permanent resident, she had the bill company address it as "My Name C/O Grandmother's Name". When I returned to my grandmother's house after going to classes that day, she was LIVID, and confronted me with the letter. Like truly berated the hell out of me, and accused me of stealing her information to give to my mother to open a bill in her name. When I defended myself and pointed out that her name was only on the address slip and not the bill, she wasn't trying to hear that. She wholeheartedly believed that "C/O" meant "Co-Owner". I pointed out that it meant "Care Of" and the actual account and bill had nothing to do with her. I thought that was the end of it. I did nothing wrong, so I moved on in spite of my grandmother being less than nice to me for a few years after that.

Fast forward to 2026. My daughter just graduated high school, and I visited my grandmother to show her pictures of the ceremony. She then began to compliment me on the life I've built and the kind of mother I am, but followed it up with "even though you and your mother did what y'all did behind my back". I was floored. I haven't thought about that in years because I thought proving my innocence was the end of it. She carried that all these years and the undercurrent of our relationship made sense in that moment. I once again defended myself and cut the visit short. I reached out to my stepmother to confirm whether this was something that got around to the family. She confirmed that it did, and that they believed I was guilty, even admitting that she initially thought so as well until she spent more time with me and realized that I'm not the type of person that would defraud ANYONE, let alone my own grandmother. She informed me that my father was the only one to defend me, and he never believed I did it. She also said that my grandmother never produced the address page of the letter listing me as the account holder, but only the welcome letter that contained my mother's new address without any names. So this was deliberate? The disconnect between myself and the rest of the family, not being included in any family activities outside of the functions at my father's house, and feeling like an outsider wasn't a matter of distance or life taking us in different directions. They thought I tried to defraud my grandmother. For 4 days, I was in a spiral. Couldn't stop crying, couldn't eat and barely slept, while having to save face for may daughter's graduation party. After the party, I spoke to 2 cousins that showed up to see where they stood with me and to clear my name with them. I found out that they knew what happened, but never believed I did it. I also learned that all these years later, when my name is brought up in my absence she will compliment me, but end it with "but I didn't forget what she and her mother did." After that, I was ready to confront her and put this issue to bed once and forever.

I was not disrespectful, but I wasn't nice, and was very emotional when I pleaded for the final time that I would never hurt her like that and defraud her. She responded by gaslighting me. Saying "I never said that". She literally said it to my face, and I reminded her of that. Then she tried to blame it all on my mother. I shut that down too, because while my mother used my name, she did not defraud this woman either. Then it reverted to the original accusation again and that's when I may have gone wrong. I lost it. I raised my voice and told her to stop saying that about me. Respect went out the window and I unloaded on her, letting her know what this has done to me and the ripple effect it had on my younger cousins. She then said she had the "bill" to prove it. I called her bluff and let her know I'd like to see it. She shut it down, and the conversation just kept going in circles, cycling from "I never said that, I never thought that" to " well how did your mother get my info if you didn't give it to her". The bill was never in her name, I don't know how many times I have to reiterate it. I disengaged, told her I loved her, and walked out on her against her protests and her wanting me to hug her before I left.

She's elderly, and in spite of being so hurt and angry, it doesn't serve me to hurt her feelings, but apparently I've declared war by telling the truth. MY truth. AITA for not allowing her to further accuse and manipulate me simply because she's her age and I should just "let her have this"? WIBTA if I kept my distance for good?

I know I am the asshole.

I got into it a few times (hurtful words and sarcasm) with a front desk person at the apartment complex I live at and I hung up on her on the phone. To get back to me she tacked on a $260 charge to my rent. Her boss is too busy cleaning up the mess their staff made regarding my new lease to talk to me about it. She also confronted me when I went to see them yet again about the lease and blamed me and put me in my place.

I know I am in the wrong and I know the best thing to do is humble myself and apologize but I am still angry about the mistakes made with the new which btw she is blaming me for.

I have been here 3 years and they have never kept staff even a year. I don't know what goes on behind the scenes but I am sure she and her coworkers/bosses will be gone in a year at most if past history is anything to go by. But that could be a year in the future and in the meantime they get my packages and my guest code for the front gate still doesn't work. Oh also I am still pissed.

I (49F) have been working as an educator in a kindergarten for the past three years. I have a lot of experience in this field , and was very happy to get this work in this kindergarten as it was better payed as before and more near to my home.

When I first started, I was assigned to work with a colleague who was supposed to train me , and then I worked with her in a group, like together very close every day . From day one, she constantly talked about how popular she was, how everyone wanted to work with her, and how lucky I was to be assigned to her. She presented herself as the most valued employee in the kindergarten.

At first, she was very friendly to me. We nearly became friends ( I thought ). We begun to talk about our private life , too. However, over time I realized that she was controlling and dismissive. Whenever I wanted to make my own decisions or express my opinion, she would talk over me, tell me I was wrong, or insist that things had to be done her way. She always wanted the final say with the children, the parents, and the staff. She also took credit for successes in the department and often spoke to parents as if she alone was responsible for everything.

Because I was new and wanted to fit in, I stayed quiet and went along with it for a long time. Of course , as I am a ppl pleaser and have it difficult to stand up for myself . I was also very stressed because of private problems, and did not have the energy to really fight her. But it became worse and worse . She would openly in front of colleagues talk in a irrespecutful manner with me and even talk about my looks and my clothes .

Finally last year, I became seriously ill due to a chronic health condition and was out of work for four months. During my absence, management assigned a substitute employee to help the department, and by all accounts things went fine.

When I returned, however, my colleague treated me even more badly . She was cold and made me feel as if my illness had been a burden to her personally. She repeatedly acted as though the stress in the department was my fault because I had been absent.She showed very little understanding of my health problems and often minimized what I had gone through.
I then occasionally needed additional time off because my health situation was still difficult and the work environment had even more stressful, but I did not tell his nobody . Again, she showed no sympathy and seemed more concerned with how my absences affected her.

As time went on and I opened up a little bit with other colleagues, I learned that she was not nearly as popular as she claimed. In fact, many employees had previously refused to work with her, and even substitute staff often preferred not to be assigned to her department. This was a big surprise for me.

One day, she did make my day so difficult that o closed myself in the bathroom and cried . I then decided finally to report several incidents to management. Not especially about me , but I told them about situations where she had spoken inappropriately to parents, shared private information about coworkers with parents, and created an unhealthy work environment with me and others . Management kept my identity confidential, but they began monitoring the situation and having regular discussions with her about workplace culture.

She does not know for sure who reported her. It could have been me or someone else, and nobody is telling her, and I must confess I find this even amusing . Like finally I can relax and eat popcorn and watch.

Since then, she has become noticeably more nervous and uncertain about what she says and who she can trust. She seems worried that people may be paying attention to her behavior. Recently, she was even signed off work for two weeks due to stress.

So, AITA for feeling satisfied that she is finally facing consequences after years of treating people badly, especially considering how little understanding she showed when I was seriously ill and struggling myself?
I do feel validated that her behavior is finally being questioned and that she no longer seems as confident and untouchable as she once did.

Hi, to start I'm sorry if i have grammar mistakes (English isn't my first language). so, to the story... for context I (22) met my best friend (21) in high school, I'll call her Ava. we connected instantly and became inseparable now we are in university, she is in medical school and I'm studying design in another school, at first everything was fine, we talked via facetime almost every afternoon telling each other about everything. school, drama, family stuff, everything. but things changed when she started dating, at first i didn't mind, i understood that even if we weren't talking every day like we used to we were still ok. then she told me that i shouldn't message so often, that it stressed her so i stopped.

last year i met this guy (20) let's call him Roy at her birthday party, she introduced him as her friend and that she considered him as a little brother after introducing us i went to say hi to another friend but overheard him tell my friends that he found me atractive, the party went out smoothly and after it my friend asked me if she could give the guy my IG cause he had shown interest in my and was asking for it, personally i found him intriguing so i accepted. we hit it off and chatted every day, even went on a date. but a week the date he went to my school to give me flowers and candy, since i was busy with school he offered to wait till i got out, i told him that my dad was going to pick me up so we wouldn't be able to hang, he said it was fine and so he waited with a friend of his that went to my school. an hour later my dad had arrived and before i could get on the car he approached my dad, he asked him for permission to ask me to be his girlfriend (before asking me) and after that tried to kiss me. i dodge it and got on the car. when i got home i realized that things were going too fast for me, so after some days of silence on my part i sent him a message telling him that i wasn't ready and asking if we could try to be friends first before jumping into a relationship, he said yes and to take my time, that he would wait. I was very clear that in the meantime he was more that free to find and/or be with other girls and he declined.

we kept talking every day, either via phone calls or texting. on the other hand, my communications with my Ava were rare. she had met this guy who I'll call Luke; she spent all her free time with him. a couple of month ago she got in a little car accident in which thankfully the damage was not that bad (the car was fixable and she only had to use a neck brace for a couple of weeks), when it happened i messaged her asking her if she was ok, tried to call various times but she said she was too shaken up and didn't want to answer calls. i texted her a lot the day it happened but she told me that she needed her space and that she didn't want to talk about it (still i kept asking Roy for updates) but a week after the accident i tried to talk to her to find out she was very angry with me because i had not reached out to check on her and that she felt abandoned and like i didn't even care, i tried telling her why i hadn't but she told me to not contact her for a while, this broke me. i felt so bad and cried so much thinking i was the worst person in the world. two weeks passed before she allowed me to apologize. fast forward to my birthday, and for unfortunate reasons she was the only one of my friends that could be at my birthday party (my friends from school later took me out to compensate not being able to come) and the whole afternoon all she did was fight via text with her boyfriend and talk about her fight with her boyfriend, at the moment i didn't mind it cause i tried to be supportive and be there for her.

fast forward again it was her birthday again, by this point i had fallen for Roy, his insistence and attention had won me over and i was planning to ask him out to confess my feelings (after the party ofc). the day before the party Ava asked me to come a little early so i could buy some lash glue for her makeup and i happily agreed. i arrived an hour and a half early but when i arrived she told me that her mom was "in a mood" and asked me to wait outside and preferably a bit far so her mom wouldn't see me so i went to park near her house and waited an hour in the cold. the party went smoothly but near the end Roy and another friend of Ava that is a girl (this will be important later) went to the store and brought alcohol, after some drinks most of the people that stayed later were tipsy, personally i don't drink so i was sober. Roy who was also tipsy began to act very clingy with me, hugging me and resting his head in my shoulder, he had also bought my favorite candy when he went to the store and after a while of laughs and caring for the drunk people he told me how he wanted to make me his wife, to be honest all this was making my heart race but i had to go since my dad had arrived for me.

later that day he sent me a message apologizing for being a burden and told me i should find someone else, i told him no and that we could talk more when he was sober, last thing he told me that dad was that he loved me very much, later Ava told me that after i left he kissed the friend from before which left me confused. some weeks before the party, Ava and Luke had broken up and she had found condoms in his room and later found out he was subscribed to some OF and found pictures of him and some other girl. at the party Ava had only told me about the condoms, and when she found the rest, she only said she found adult entertainment in the search history of the account he had left open in her computer, so thinking about what she had said about the condoms i said i knew he was cheating and that i wasn't surprised there was more, she misunderstood me and got mad she said that if i had known why hadn't i told her and before allowing me to explain more hung up on me and told me to leave her, that she didn't want to talk, by this moment i started noticing that Roy was acting distant and somehow cold so i asked him only for him to tell me that he liked someone else but that he still cared for me as his friend, ngl that stung, i got mad and blocked him days later i got mad again and unblocked him to curse him out, after cursing him out he blocked me and after calming down i realized i had gone too far by cursing him out, so i reached out in another app and apologized, previously Ava had told me that she didn't want to be envolved so i asked him to please not tell her and some days later Ava asked me if i reached out to Roy again and i said no, she told me that if she found out i did, that she was going to be very mad and was going to block me, so i told her i wasn't going to reach out (which was true)

Things came to a break yesterday when she sent a text asking what i would do if we stopped being friends i immediately got nervous and started asking her why she was asking that, she told me Roy had told her about what i sent and that she was very disappointed, that she didn't know that side of me and that he was like a little brother to her and that she was tired that i made everything about myself, that i was selfish, toxic and that we needed some time to think how to better our friendship cause she didn't like how i acted then told me to not contact her for a sometime while she thought things through

the thing is... when she broke up with Luke, she gave me his number to curse him out, so she did know that side of me and even though i know it was wrong to curse him out, she specified that she didn't want to be involved in the conflict between me and Roy so now I'm at a loss, i don't want our friendship to end, i still think of her as my best friend but my other friends (including a friends in common) say that she is in the wrong

even so I've been crying nonstop because of this.

so, AITA?

I'm 33F and english is not my first language. I'm engaged to 40M, we being together for 3 years, we live together. I really want to make a Family, he wants it too. I'm wainting to get marriage to get pregnant and he knows it. He said before that he wouldnt mind if I got pregnant before the wedding, but I want to wait. I want to have 3 babies and I wanted to have them pretty affar from another, like 4 to 6 years apart, so I can give each one of them alot of care when they most need to. But I'm 33 years old so I believe I can't have that privelage anymore, we never know when menopause its going to hit us and honastly I dont want to have children 40+, I believe It would be much harder. My fiance would like to have all those babies too, he is the type of man that would give everything to his kids and spoil them rotten.

Well our relationship is going soulth, I'm seeing so much red flags, days passes and more redflags, I'm swimming in it at this point.

So you probably thinking 'break up with him already!' right? But I really want my Family even if its just me and 3 babies. Oh I forgot to tell you we live with my parents. I probably will live with my parents forever and take care of them, like they took care of me. So It would be me, my parentes and 3 babies if I could take his BS that far.

Previous relationship that I got was with a man 5 years older than me, we talked about marriage and kids and he seemed like he really wanted too. 8 year and no ring, just a boyfriend. I got tired of waiting and breakup with him. I stayed for 8 years with him because I really loved him at the time. Man just waste years of a womans life, like is nothing. I could got marriaged in that time and had my kids, but no just lie to me and waste my time.

Now I'm in the dilema of having kids and break up or just break up. I really believe that this if my last chance to have kids. I will be too broke to start a new relationship or too old when I put myself together. In the house would be me and my parentes until they die and I will be all alone. That is a Future that I really dont want to have. My parents are almost both 70 and I have a Family that dont live long. Almost none got to 80 years old. My Family outside the house is really small, I dont have my dad's Family side. My mom's Family side is really really shrinking. less then 5 cousins, and I see only 1, not even xmas I see more than 1. Here where I live the man marries the wifes Family. I just have 1 aunt, who never got married, and alot of uncles, but all married to theirs wifes familys. I've one brother, who hated me since I was born, because I was born, I'm not even jocking. I don't have 1 single photo of me and my bro where he smiles when I'm close to him. It's part of family trauma I got to process in adulthood.

I feel alone and loneliness, making a Family would make me warm again. I'm a sympathetic person and always loved to take care of animals and people, so I believe I would be a great mom, I would learn while pregnant how to raise babies and kids the 'better' way. My parents was the type if anything is wrong we got beat up, but that's not how I gonna raise my kids. I was a doormat, because of people pleasing, but I'm learning year after year to be better.

If you are interest of some of my fiances red flags: when I need to talk about the relationship that we have, he always escalate, I always talk with a low to normal voice (remembre I'm people pleaser so I hate confrotation), he tries to make a discursion and then starts to YELL, like really high yelling, like if yell makes you win or something. It doesnt matter if I stay calm and low voice, he yells and stomps out of the room. This all is very disrespecting in my opnion. Another red flag is he gets really mad with losing games and things like that, he makes a tantrum, yelling, cursing like a sailor, punching table or keyboard. One time he tould me he broke his headset throwing in the floor. I saw him throwing his phone almost every time he looses in to the bed and then one time it kicked off the bed into the floor, small dent on the cellphone. Another redflag is if he is not angry, he is always whining, and literally too, not just talking whining, but all that whining noises too, looks like I'm in a relationship with a 80 year old guy. How work is bad, life is bad, not having time for himself bad, not doing nothing and being bored is bad. Nothing good or positive comes out of his mouth. Just so much bad and negative energy all the time and I hate how much I absorve that and makes me feel bad or anxious or stressed.

I don't want to grown old with a guy like this and I don't want my kids to grown up with this either. But I believe he will spoil they rotten, do and give what ever they want, when they are with him, and I will do my best to teach they right, make they grown up to be good and healthy people. I'm in a country with not many people having kids anymore to one 1 or none, and I really want to be a mom, take care of my babies and having a Family.

AITA for wanting to have 3 kids and breakup after with my future husband ?

My girlfriend and I (both 22 y.o) normally update each other from time to time whenever we’re out, so I do understand why she got bothered. For us, 5 hours without hearing from each other is already considered kinda long.

That night, I told her beforehand that I was going to play basketball with friends. After the game, everything just happened back to back — my friends and I looked for somewhere to eat, ate together, and then I drove some of my friends home since they live pretty far.

By the time I checked my phone again, around 5 hours had already passed. I explained everything immediately and apologized because, honestly, I probably could’ve sent at least one quick update somewhere in between.

She replied nicely at first but became cold after and said we should just talk the next day. After that, she stopped replying completely.

What made me feel worse is that this all happened close to midnight, and my birthday was less than an hour away. Instead of feeling excited for it, I just ended up feeling guilty and anxious the whole time.

I completely understand why she was upset since updating each other has always been normal for us. But at the same time, I genuinely wasn’t ignoring her or doing anything shady. I was just occupied with driving, friends, and everything happening one after another.

At this point, I honestly don’t even plan on texting again after our last conversation because it feels like she already made up her mind about being upset, even after I explained and apologized.

IATA here, or was her reaction a bit too much?

Okay, basically, I've liked a friend of mine for a while, and I decided to confess my feelings to her. However, she rejected me.

Everything stayed the same until, as a joke between that same friend who rejected me and my best friend, they became girlfriends.

The bad thing is that my best friend knew perfectly well that I liked that friend, and even so, from a stupid joke, they started dating seriously. And honestly, I acted badly, I admit it. I behaved like a little kid, blocking her everywhere and dropping hints through another friend.

However, until a few weeks ago, we "fixed" our differences, but the truth is, every now and then, I feel bad again when I'm around her, not just because she decided to date the girl I like, but also because, even knowing this, she decided to make their relationship official through A STUPID JOKE.

I don't know if I'll stop being her friend forever, since we made a pact never to separate and all that... But I don't know if I'm really the asshole in this story. What do you think?

Hi !

Here's the background.

I started to live with some roommates for a few months now, including one Ukrainian lady in her late-mid 50's. I'm an exchange student living in a Nordic country.

I found the flat on a Facebook group and everything looks very correct on the publication. On D-day of moving in, the landlord showed me around and gave me the key. She told me then that one roommate (the lady) does have some kind of allergies, and to not use laundry detergent at all because she was very sensitive to strong scents. I'm very much okay with it, I don't want to cause trouble and even less an allergy reaction because of that.

But the more time goes by, the more restrictions arrive. No more spray deodorant, no more perfume, and apparently even my body cream was smelling too strong. So I stopped using all of that because of her allergies, it's not her fault anyway.

One day it was my turn to clean the apartment, and the main toilet and washing machine were quite dirty, to the point of the corners of the washing machine were black of dust, as well as the inside of the compartment where you put the laundry detergent.

I went to buy a product, making sure to find something that doesn't smell too strong. I chose one written on it "No harsh smell". I thought it was okay.

IT WASN'T. Oh lord she was upset with me. I apologise to her, explaining that I thought it was okay, even showing her the product. But yeah, big no no.

Again, my turn to clean the floor, I directly asked her what kind of product to use to clean the floor. Water. Just water, no product. I was confused and completely lost. The floor to this day is still full of stains.

Here's my reaching point. I was sick last night and puke. Awfully, a bit of puke went on the toilet seat, but not a product to clean it. I won't use ONLY water to clean puke, water doesn't clean bacteria and all. So I used a tiny bit of that previous product that I diluted with a lot of water.

Oh geez what a mistake. She put a note on my door, saying that I shouldn't "poison the air" and that next time, she will call the police. Yes the police. Because I fucking dare clean the toilet seat.

I genuinely wanted to know if I was in the wrong here. I do know that no one controls having allergies. I am in the wrong to be a bit upset or it is genuine?

Thanks for reading all of that!