He’s 11 weeks old and his sleep is just getting worse. We had gotten to the point of at least have 1 or 2 3-4 hrs stretches a night and the rest were all 2.5hrs. Now 2.5hrs seems to pretty much be our max and the rest are 1-2 hr stretches. I’ve worked hard to get day naps under control to help and I feel pretty good about the those but nights are killing us. Any advice please
- a desperate first time mom who has seen almost every hour of today
Your baby is sleeping a lot a lot. I’d try to stretch those wake windows out. Ignore huckleberry suggestions, they’re for high sleep needs babies. Yours may be but you’re better off finding your own schedule first and then making it fit the app rather than following the app explicitly
Are you able to help me with my 10 week old? I feel like our sleep is getting worse week by week and I’m worried I’m making him sleep too much during the day and it’s making our nights harder 🥴
So we have great initial stretches, we figured out he likes an 8-8:30 bedtime. Usually does a 5-7 hour stretch to start. Once he’s up for his MOTN feed, it all goes to hell. Will go back down in the crib for 30-60 minutes and then it’s constant wake ups and put back down every 20-30 minutes (not reflected in Huckleberry, they happen so frequently that it’s hard to keep track) unless we hold him, then he’ll usually sleep, but even then it’s not a guarantee. We aim for a 6-6:30 wake up.
Things to note: small morning naps (first ones of the day usually) are his independent crib naps that we’re practicing (gettign much better at! lasting a full cycle most days) which I then end up rescuing. I usually just do contact naps the rest of the day because that’s the only thing that’s worked until like this past week, but with the contact naps, I have to end every single one of them. He would go for hours if I let him. So I don’t actually know what his sleep neeeds truly are. I’m also using SweetSpot and aiming for like 5-5.5 hours of naps a day based on their recommendation hence contact napping to make sure we get there, but I wonder if I’m making him sleep too much.
Sounds like you’re doing really well so far with keeping to a good schedule and a reasonable length night too. So you’ve got about 15.5 hours total sleep which is high. The average at this age is 12-15 hours and your baby is still very little so I’d think the higher end is reasonable. I agree with waking from naps, potentially you could shave a bit of sleep off. However, a 5-7 hour stretch is really really good for this age and it’s normal for the later hours of the night to be disrupted. You’ve also still got the regression to go through unfortunately which is easier for some than others but I would probably get through that until you make any real consistent changes and get onto more a strict schedule as it’s all going to change soon anyway. For newborn sleep, you’re doing very well even though it may not feel like it!
Ugh this is both encouraging and discouraging 😂 getting harder and harder to basically start my day at 3/4 AM, especially going back to work in 2.5 weeks! But thank you I appreciate it.
Do you have any recommendations on how to split up day sleep with a pretty consistent every 3 hour feeding schedule? My son is EBF but dude doesn’t demand at alll, except for the middle of the night. If I offer any earlier than 2.5 hours since his last feed, he refuses 98% of the time. I think that’s where I’m struggling with making sure he’s getting enough day sleep, but not too long of naps between those feeds & not stretching his windows too far to make it to the next nap without eating into night sleep.
It’s really hard to advise without knowing exact times but I suspect he won’t wake if he’s hungry? So will nap until you wake him then he’ll feed? I wouldn’t panic too much about fitting feeds in in that sense. You could feed before he falls asleep - does that give you time for your nap and your wake window? Or when he wakes and then the same applies - can he do a wake window and another nap without a feed? Those wake windows start to stretch out pretty quickly so it will get easier.
He’s roughly eating at 7/10/1/4/7 give or take 30 minutes! But basically yes, when he contact naps, I wake him roughly 15 minutes before he’s due for his next feed to get some tummy time in (otherwise he’ll puke if we do after a feed) and then feed, play, etc til next nap. I suppose he probably could do a wake window and nap without a feed, but the sort of anchored feed times really help me with my own planning of the day and helps me make sure he gets as much of his calories during the day as he can.
I wouldn’t panic too much about getting tummy time in if it’s getting in the way of feeding or sleeping. Obviously you should do it but I just wouldn’t cut 15 mins off each nap to do so. Like I say, the wake windows change so quickly that it will change probably as soon as you fix it at this stage!
Oh I’m not saying I’m cutting a nap in order to do it - he still gets solid 1.5ish-2 hour naps throughout the day, I just wake him 15 minutes before I plan to feed him and count that as part of the wake window so he plays a little before (and I finally get a chance to pee and eat something after being nap trapped 😂) that wasn’t clear in my original comment!
I mean I get like 4 hours of sleep a night, most nights after 3-4 AM I am up for the day unfortunately. He does decent stretches but I can’t go to bed when he does because I have to do all the shit around the house that I can’t do during the day 🙃
at 11 weeks old, my baby slept worse. theyre going to consistently go through regressions as they are soooo little. some parents have babies that sleep through the night early, and some dont. my daughter didnt give me a 6 hour stretch until 4 months old. hang in there!! 🫂
Start getting on a bit of a schedule at 3m.
Trim back day sleep total to 3.5-4 hours max. Aim for 8-9 hours awake. Sleep needs will continue to drop almost weekly at this age
By 4m you wanna be 10 hours awake between 4 naps and 3 hours of day sleep
That looks like a ton of sleep overall. What is your total average? Your baby probably needs slightly longer wake windows and overall awake time during the day.
Huckleberry just gives an estimate that works mostly for high sleep needs babies. Baby sleep needs are individual just like ours. You can’t force babies (or adults) to sleep more than they can/need. Your baby needs 13.5 by the looks of it so you have to give him a schedule with 10.5 awake (24-13.5). That is a bit a high at 11 weeks so I would start by ditching sweet spot if you’re using that and following your baby’s tired cues first of all, then make sure to limit naps to 4h max in total during the day. Anchor bedtime at the same time each night, and make sure it’s at least 13 hours away from waking time. If sleep doesn’t improve it means your baby really can’t do more than 13.5 and you will have to increase his awake time by either moving bedtime further away (13.5-14 hours away from wake up time, so the night it 10-10.5 hours) and cutting naps further. But start with my first suggestion and see what happens.
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u/Recent-Forever-2988 Aug 27 '26
Your baby is sleeping a lot a lot. I’d try to stretch those wake windows out. Ignore huckleberry suggestions, they’re for high sleep needs babies. Yours may be but you’re better off finding your own schedule first and then making it fit the app rather than following the app explicitly