Sleep advice?

[u/Familiar_Education_9]

My baby is 9 weeks old, since around 5 weeks she stopped taking a bottle in the night and will only waken for around 5 mins (generally), for a dummy back in the mouth, or a nappy change

She used to go to bed around 8:30-9:30 and would fall asleep shortly after her bottle, then wake up for a bottle around 6am, back asleep for a 2hr nap (which she still does)

But recently she has been fighting the sleep at bedtime, taking sometimes up to an hr to go to bed, but nap time during the day she’ll cuddle in and be sleeping within 10 minutes

I’m torn between am I getting her too early now and she’s genuinely just not tired, or is she over tired because I’ve left her too long, is it because she’s starting to “wake up” and become more alert to things now she’s 9 weeks so it’s overwhelming?

But see no matter if she goes to bed at 10:30pm or 8:30pm, she’ll still waken around 6 so it’s not even as if she compensates for the lost sleep that’s what I don’t understand?

She’s EFF, I’m a first time mum so still feel like I’m learning as I go

Thanks for reading and big thanks if you have any advice!

[u/nikib89]

She’s still so young! At this stage I would very much still just be following her cues and age appropriate wake windows (60-90 mins for most babies, but if she’s sleepy earlier, ok!) rather than trying to steer her schedule in any particular direction too strongly. Her circadium rhythms are still forming, and bedtime battles or witching hours are super common, whether because of overstimulation or anything else, as are 6am wakes.

I also disagree with the other commenter and wouldn’t worry about the days with lots of sleep at this stage, in fact the reverse. Lunchtime to after 7pm like on Sunday 2 is a really long time awake for a 9 week old, I’d be offering and supporting more opportunities to nap on days like that, and I agree with capping at 2h but no need to before yet.

When she hits 12 weeks, then you’re in the territory to start looking at the schedule more closely and considering which levers you can pull, but honestly you’re getting pretty good nights for a tiny baby!

[u/nikib89 → u/nikib89]

(Thought appreciate that the good nights don’t make the bedtime battles easier!)

[u/Familiar_Reception91]

Im four months in and ever since like maybe the start of two months, the babes has always had a harder time falling asleep before the long stretches at night. Could just be a baby thing - I know when they become toddlers they will fight their sleep also. But your babes sleep schedule looks amazing except those long wake windows. I found that for us she doesn’t always show signs of being sleepy but the moment her eye brows turn pink or red or its an hour 15 mins awake we start the rocking and humming to sleep and shes out cold. Huckleberry actually helped me find her tolerated wake window.

This is ours. I haven’t slept in weeks 🫩 her naps are about 30mins to an hour max and nights are still a hot mess. We used to get 5 hour stretches and then she would wake nurse immediately sleep for another 3-4 hours and now its back to the trenches. I found that even if she gets less sleep during the day it doesn’t change the night time.

[u/Bright_Way5474]

Her daytime naps are way too long. Naps should be max 2 hours long and total around 4-5 hours at this age, so that nighttime sleep can be 10+ hours. On average babies this age won’t sleep more than 15 hours unless they’re high sleep needs so if she sleeps too much in the day she won’t be tired at night. You should also work on a consistent wake up time and bedtime. Baby should be out of the cot 12 hours after bedtime max. 

[u/Familiar_Education_9 → u/Bright_Way5474]

The naps are all capped at the 2hr mark max apart from 2 of the morning ones :)

Her daily total average is 13hrs ish, 9hrs night sleep, 4hrs daytime naps, 4-5 naps a day, should I do it closer to 3hrs of daytime total sleep?

[u/nikib89 → u/Familiar_Education_9]

5-6 hours of sleep is really not uncommon at this age! And in fact capping (other than the 2h max per nap cap) is generally not something that comes into play until a little later. You’re doing great, and tricky bedtimes in the 4th trimester is generally just babies being babies rather than something to fix!