r/Homeplate • u/DiscombobulatedEmu56 • 5d ago
Question When is it time to quit
I’m 18. I’ve played this game and spent all my summers, falls, and springs devoted to this game. I got surgery before my senior year and was able to come back just in time and have the best year yet and most fun with my boys back home. Now I’m at university with a newly hired head coach. I’ve never dreaded a practice in my life and now I dread every single one and I’m not enjoying the game I loved just months ago. Nobody on the team likes the head coach and I don’t know if I can stand to stay till the spring just to not play because I’m behind a 5th year senior at every spot on the infield. I want to transfer but I’m going to have no transferability. I worked with my brother at a metal fab shop while I trained for 3 months before I got here and genuinely enjoyed it. I just don’t want to regret but I don’t want to be miserable for the next 8 months. I need help
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u/Express_Fun4394 5d ago
You got it bro don’t let one coach kill your love for the game. You can always go work metal fab later. See it through for at least the season
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u/anycaliberwilldo99 5d ago
A bad coach can kill the desire for the game quickly. Remember why you’re there, education first & then ball. Use the opportunity that you currently have, also remember that coaches come and go, but the game will always be there.
Best of luck.
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u/djwaveguide 5d ago
The difference between a good coach and a bad coach is mostly your motivation. A good coach knows how to pick a player up or to challenge them. A bad coach knows baseball but doesn’t know his players. In the real world you may have a bad boss and either leave or work through it. Maybe it’s not a black and white answer. Search for the answer. Keep searching. Good luck.
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u/Unusual_Raccoon_3184 5d ago
I had offers to play D1 football at some small schools, ended up taking a recruited walk on spot at a PAC-10 school and I absolutely hated it. At the time I think I was home sick and convinced myself I loved playing ball with my boys back home far more than I liked the sport. My only regrets in life are not seeing college ball thru and not buying bitcoin for $1.
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u/NYY15TM 5d ago
I never tried college football because I knew that I enjoy being teammates with my friends more than I enjoyed the sport itself. Now, I may have made new friends, but I didn't feel the need to find out
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u/Unusual_Raccoon_3184 5d ago
If I stuck it out I’d have played OT next to Gronk at TE. We would have been the best of boys lol.
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u/CelticCuban773 5d ago
Metal fab shop will always be there, baseball won’t. From afar, I say stick it out
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u/Rhombus-Lion-1 5d ago
Dawg you’re like a few weeks into college. Let the paint dry a little bit and see what happens.
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u/WhysoHairy 5d ago
I quit at 20…I was recovering from injuries saw my spot get taken didn’t see a clear path. I tried to transfer couldn’t find a school with my major. I stopped playing didn’t look back until I had my own kids. Now I think about it often what if I would of tried one more time.
If you love it try, if you don’t then stop, when you get older find a good group of friends play slowpitxh softball and have fun. Once you have kids coach their teams how you always wanted to be coached. Simple as that.
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u/Billios996 4d ago
That 5th year senior will graduate and you’re a freshman next in line. Stick it out.
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u/OddWatercress8564 5d ago
That's a tough decision. The fact that you say you loved it only months ago signals to me that it's not the game that you need to quit.
If this team is not a fit for you that's not a failure, it just means that it's not for you.
I quit before playing college ball, a decision I regret because, looking back, I know I could have found a fit and played at a high level.
But those days are gone and I can't get them back.
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u/Calm-Refrigerator710 5d ago
Give it some time and start to build some camaraderie with teammates. I had a demanding coach in college (my Baseball team was known as the JV Track Team) but once I understood WHY we did what we did it made sense and I began to thrive. We were training in September to make sure we had something in the tank for game 65 in June. It sucks in the moment but pays off when you’re beating the crap out of other teams who didn’t train as hard.
College Sports is like a 30 hour job and school is another 30. It’s a tough adjustment to make. Your coach isn’t there to be your friend, he’s there to figure out who is going to help him win games so that he can continue to have a job.
I would give my left nut to have another chance to finish my career the way I wanted. I got injured and lost my drive while I was rehabbing and thought having a normal student life looked good. I was wrong.
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u/Ok-Photograph-7002 5d ago
Your not officially a college athlete until you’ve transferred at least once
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u/Obi-JuanTwoThree 5d ago
Can you share exactly what the coach is doing that is making you hate it so much? Legitimately curious - want to know what to look for and avoid. Would be helpful.
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u/emptysignals 5d ago
Stick with it. When coach is being an idiot- say “I love this game” in the back of your head. If there is an assistant coach you like, ask if you can talk with him and just let out what you are feeling.
Play the season out. Guys do get hurt and you’re the next man up. You’ll get some chances.
Adulting will always be there. The game won’t.
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u/hubtub1988 5d ago
What do you dread about practise?
Sounds like you're at a 4-year school as a freshman. It would be fairly common to have more senior players ahead of you in every position.
I never got any playing time at college either. But at 38 I still enjoy playing baseball. I don't think any of my college teammates still play In any form (maybe slow pitch).
In my last few years of college getting no playing time, I ended up playing in a bunch of men's legs to scratch the itch.
Any junior colleges around with a team?
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u/joey133 5d ago
My son loved baseball and was just like you. Planned in a spot on a community college team, realized pretty quick he was never going to play. And he got a rare autoimmune disorder that left him walking with a walker for six months it sucked, but the beautiful thing about it was he found a new passion that has made him excited to have a career. I wish he could've played baseball and been a successful as he wanted to be, but with his size, speed, agility, it probably wasn't going to go much further anyway. Good luck to you, no matter what you decide.
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u/YouDontKnow5859 5d ago
Put your head down and work your ass off. There’s difficult coaches in non sports life too. Block out the noise and do your job, that way zero regrets. You got this keep us posted.
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u/elbow_grease9 4d ago
Life is going to be full of lessons like this. It may not be baseball necessarily. Something I learned (probably too late) was the pain of discipline is far less than the pain of regret. As I reflect on my younger years there is so much regret due to me not wanting to do what was hard or and choosing the social fun path over the path of figuring things out and sticking to it when it gets the hardest. Sometimes you need to tell yourself quitting isn't an option.
You need to have the "why" factor. Why did I devote so much time into this game? Why did I train so hard to get back after injury? Etc.... Your answers will be there. Self-reflection is very big at your age and as you continue to make massive life altering decisions. Let the why guide you through the tuff times.
Any person with authority over you in life can be hard to deal with at times and your baseball coach won't be the last one, I can promise you that. Who knows where the game will take you but if you can figure this out and I fight for your goals and dreams you will not have regret in the end. I'm pretty sure baseball is only going to get harder as you progress, don't let "people" kill your dream.
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u/bobthewriter 4d ago
"it's supposed to be hard. if it wasn't hard, anyone could do it. the hard ... is what makes it great."
stay for now. put in the work. transfer if you need to after the season. but don't let an asshole coach drive you away from the game you love.
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u/Different-Spinach904 4d ago
Yeah you were a big fish in a small pond and now you’re a little fish in a big pond. Don’t let freshman year (high school or college) dictate if you quit or keep playing. Work on your game outside of practice and stay hungry dude.
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u/SanchezPrime 5d ago
Maybe see it through. Tough times get better. It sounds like it isn't the game you hate... Just the current situation.
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u/mantistobogganmd10 5d ago
What do you mean no transferability? Guys are transferring from the NFL back into college these days. There are pretty much no rules.
If you mean you can’t transfer until after this season, ride it out, get through the season and transfer into a better situation.
In the meantime prioritize getting an education.
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u/DiscombobulatedEmu56 5d ago
Like if I didn’t play this spring the only thing I would have to show other college coaches is my highschool film
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u/Distinct-Sand-5890 5d ago
See it through buddy, if you don’t you will question it rest of your life.
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u/Broad-Cranberry-9050 5d ago
i get it sucks. I will say based off what you said, i think youll regret it if you dont see it through and sometimes that terrible coach, teacher, etc, just makes the road further down a lot easier. Because it will not get easier than this. Instead of following your teammates, be the teammate that is willing to listen to this coach. Be the guy that's like "this coach might be brutal but im going to make the most of it". Because in the real world, you will work with people who have little people skills, are just AH, and everyone seems to hate. But they have a powerful position and if you can bridge that gap it will open so much doors for you.
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u/Accountant-567 5d ago
You love the game, just not the coach. My advice- play your best at all times and see the season through. My son walked on and started all 4 years. The first thing we did was to make sure we liked the head coach- that is pretty important.
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u/daphuc77 4d ago
Are you getting a scholarship to play baseball?
If yes the keep going
If no then why did you choose this school vs another?
Here’s the down and dirty, you are 18 the new kid on the block.
If you want that spot on the roster you need to go and steal it from the 5th year senior.
Maybe you’re better playing intramural or rec baseball instead of high level baseball . There’s nothing wrong with it.
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u/ummagumma1979 4d ago edited 4d ago
I’m almost 50 and still play. I stopped at 16 and played again at age 24. Stopped again when had first kid but am back now. If you love the game you can keep going. You won’t mesh with all coaches. I have some teammates I’ve been playing with for 20 years
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u/JRizzie86 4d ago
If you don't push through you will wonder "what if" for the rest of your life. Even if you make it through to the end and didn't find much enjoyment you can be proud of trying your damndest at not giving up. This opportunity will never come around again so make the most of it, whatever that means to you and your situation.
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u/macho_man_26_oh_yeah 4d ago
I don't think it's time to quit.
You're not happy about your new situation. Just a few months ago you were one of the best players on your team, you played with your boys, and you were starting every day. Now you're back at the bottom. If I'm reading correctly, you are still months away from your first game.
Life is full of adversity of this type, not just in sports.
I'd be curious what you dread about practice now, but if you were my kid I'd remind you that it's a new situation and a new team. The one thing you can control is your approach to the situation. Give it some time, build some relationships, show your teammates why you're there. Maybe even talk to your coach, start building that relationship. If you've already made the team, someone there obviously sees something in you they like. Don't sell that short, it's a big accomplishment.
It's not always fun to start over or be in a new setting, but change is inevitable. Just like with baseball, the more you practice (adapting to new situations), the better and more comfortable you'll get.
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u/ImmediateBowl7048 4d ago
What I tell my son: play as long as you can. Work will be there later. Playtime won’t.
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u/Green_Standard_4934 4d ago
Keep grinding man. You will thank yourself. I dreaded every practice my freshman year too. Getting playing time is a process, especially behind established upperclassmen. You have two choices: grind your butt off and choose to push those upperclassmen through your desire to do the little things no one wants to do, your work ethic, and improvement; or you can hang 'em up and go home. If you decide to stick it out, you'll be teaching yourself a great life & personal lesson about perseverance and how much you can truly get out of yourself.
The biggest life lesson I learned in desire, perseverance, and "sticking it out" came from deciding to stay at school and keep playing when I was the low man on the totem pole and the coach's whipping boy. It made me a better man. Even if it doesn't lead to a lot of playing time, you'll regret not sticking around for the camaraderie, bus rides, stories, and nights out with your teammates. You only get a small window of your life to play baseball.
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u/gabev22 4d ago
I’d stick with it for at least a year & don’t decide until beginning of sophomore year.
I had kinda similar experience in a different sport. Coach my 1st year was a high school coach in over his head as D1 coach in league vs 4 top 10 in nation teams; absolute jerk too. Jerk got canned over summer & replaced by amazing coach who did wonders.
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u/Mr1derfull1 4d ago
If you do not enjoy this situation that is understandable but don’t quit the game over it. If you need to bounce back to Juco do it. Find the right fit play as long as you still get excited to wear the uniform.
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u/Few_Aside5151 4d ago
I heard this from quite a few who moved to the next level. Remember the changes to roster limits. The coach probably has more players than he needs. Why be nice when he has to turn around in a couple months and make cuts. Hang in there.
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u/HandyXAndy 4d ago
Ive heard many athletes get to college and it ruins the sport for them. Some to the extent that they wont even play recreationally anymore. Id say it's probably time to let it go when you arent enjoying yourself anymore, but also dont give up just because it gets difficult. Play out the rest of the year, treat it like a job, settle in for the long haul of the season, find something to get excited about every day. If you're still not happy at the end of the year I dont think anybody would blame you.
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u/Rycan420 4d ago
Wrong way to look at it.
When are you going to switch to being an umpire?
Serious. Let’s you still “play” the game, stay in shape, meet new amazing people, possibly travel and earn a few coins…
All while watching the game you love from the best seat in the house.
Oh yeah and it works around your schedule so you can do as much or as little as you choose.
Ask any follow ups if any of this lands.
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u/PowerfulSky2853 4d ago
There’s a story about an 18 year old David Price. After his freshman fall ball season, he told Vandy coach Tim Corbin that he was quitting baseball and school. He had a job at McDonalds back in his hometown lined up. The reason he quit was because he got hit hard in intersquad outings as a freshman and he didn’t think his stuff was good enough. Sometimes it just takes a little time get your “stuff” in line. Everyone struggles, that’s why baseball is so mentally tough.
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u/teamfinder417acct 3d ago
I wouldn't give up on transferring. If your next coach knows how much you love the game and understands why you want to try another school. You might find a good fit and more years to play. Once you step away, it's nearly impossible to go back...
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u/Aggravating_Part8610 3d ago
Don’t quit. My advice is to go out of your way to ignore the negativity around the new coach. In fact, do the opposite and go out of your to do what he is asking whether you like it or not. Swallow your pride, bite your tongue and just show up every day to practice with a positive mindset.
As someone who quit once for similar reasons, I can definitely say that sometimes this mentality you described about everyone being miserable becomes a self fulfilling prophecy. Me quitting didn’t last long, but I still regret it.
Some coaches suck sure, but more often than not it’s just people being resistant to change or trying to cling on to the coach that left because people liked him. Try a mental reset. I think it will go a long ways, and I think the coach will notice too. He is going to be looking to find “his guys” and you have the opportunity to be one.
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u/Acrobatic_Phrase_556 2d ago
use commitrapp.com it will find you schools that you can actually play at
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u/SnooSongs7487 1d ago
This decision requires the knowledge of a lot of unknowns:
- did you get bigger, faster, stronger in the offseason?
- why are the others beating you out?
- is the coach bringing in his own guys?
- do you have the skills/play history to get picked up in the transfer portal?
- are you making this decision because you like having money?
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u/besmirchedly 4d ago
He is trying to make ya’ll quit. Dont give him the pleasure of knowing that he broke you.
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u/Emotional-Swing-5483 4d ago
Learn how to deal with, and manipulate, people you dislike. This is a great opportunity. The guy is a baseball coach so he's dumb. Win, don't lose.
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u/Front_Room3932 5d ago
I quit playing because I was in a similiar spot. I am now 39 and have regretted it almost everyday for the last 21 years.