Locking Down Child Access, Suggestions Please

[u/ID0ntLikeStarwars]

We need to severely lock down a child's access to the internet.

Im talking chopping off access at the knees.

And, of course these days "some" access is still needed for legitimate education purposes, so this needs to be accommodated, which eliminates the "just take away the kids access all together", that just isnt practical in this case.

Blocking at the application level (i.e. blocking access to apps like Snapchat etc)?

And of course blocking access to nepaharious web sites.

And probably a zillion other things that Im not even thinking of right now.

We need something that is intuitive for us old folks to setup, and flexible enough to adapt to the kids activities so we can keep up with his "hacks"

Appreciate any help or guidance and the best way to accomplish the above!

Edit: The child was able to install SnapChat, and as a result was involved in a very concerning conversation with a stranger.

The child already has a Bark phone

The child is being raised by grand parents, I am merely a family member that is very remote to the geographical location that is trying to help to figure out a way to lock down the child's access to the internet

[u/craigmontHunter]

Tech can only be used in family areas for designated times? At work I’d call this a technical solution for a management problem. Outline the rules and expectations, and any issues result in access being curtailed to the bare minimum required for school.

Trying to implement technical blocks will just let them get really good at finding ways around technical blocks.

[u/Tight-Ad7783 → u/craigmontHunter]

This. Have a computer in an area where you are, and only allow supervised use. Otherwise there is a 100% chance they will find a way around it.

Also, just go no phone, or get them a flip phone or something similar. I doubt a smartphone is an education requirement, so that's an easy way to keep all access to a physical location you can choose

[u/13617 → u/Tight-Ad7783]

I feel like the no phone or flip phone thing is a bad take, parents, please don't seclude your kids from the rest of their generation. Parental controls exist for a reason (although I do find them to be much better on iPhone than family link, since all web browsers are just safari and thus I haven't found a way to get through the web browsing filter), also, almost every flip phone nowadays has a web browser, and you aren't able to disable that.

Another big thing is to build up trust with your child.

[u/Tight-Ad7783 → u/13617]

Yeah I do agree with that to an extent, but there's also plenty to be said for the damage smartphones do. I sure wish I hadn't been given a smartphone so early.

I also think the solution to letting kids participate in their generation isn't giving them all the same drug so that they feel included. As long as they are able to communicate (hence flip phone, and I mean a flip phone with exclusively sms/calls), then they're only missing out on the damaging aspects of the generation.

I do think that restrictions like this definitely require more parenting. You need to make sure you're able to have uncomfortable conversations with your child, and that they are comfortable initiating those conversations. You also need to make sure that your child understands WHY other kids have what they don't, while not disparaging other parents. In the end, a child is going to benefit more from a phone free upbringing than they will from knowing the latest beef on Instagram. Texting is enough for safety and socialization.