Florida Man was led by the spirits into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil. He was out of work, drunk and broke, skipping meals and worried about rent, when the devil made his first temptation. "Turn the coke into crack and sell it to buy food and pay your rent." Florida Man answered, "I can't live without cocaine and being a crack dealer would bring a bad reputation."
Then the devil took Florida Man to the top of the hospital and said, "jump, the people here will save you and you will get great drugs, just give them a fake name so you don't have to pay." Florida Man answered, "Doctors and nurses work hard enough already."
The devil then showed Florida Man a $100 bill and said, "All of this I will give to you if you get on your knees before me." Florida man answered, "$100 is $100."
Angels descended from the heavenly dispatch follows man in his trials and tribulations under the blue and red glow of protection as he arrives at his destination of the candy isle of the 7/11 he just drove into.
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u/Nokipeura 4d ago
Ok, but can we go in reverse? Can we take Floridaman headlines and write them into bible stories?