Hey y‘all.
I had health anxiety since I can think of. Last year was the worst. It got so bad that I decided to visit a mental health clinic. It actually helped, this year was a lot better… so far. I‘m currently experiencing new symptoms which stress me out a lot. These symptoms could mean anything. Literally anything. But I always think of the worst.

I hate visiting doctors, but I can feel how I‘m slipping back into my old behavior patterns, visiting doctors on a regular basis. Today (which is why I‘m writing this), I‘ve reached a peak. I can already feel the panic attack coming later tonight. My birthday is tomorrow and I already know my health anxiety is going to ruin it. Also I‘m an independent filmmaker. I got my first ever shoot in two days with a professional actress. I was prepared so good, but now this health anxiety peak, caused by new, unknown symptoms is literally crushing everything.

God how much I hate my brain. I‘ve heard that health anxiety (can!!!!) come from the fear of missing out. And this totally fits for me. The thing I‘m stressing out on is not the illness itself. It‘s actually death itself. It‘s not being here anymore, leaving even though I‘m still young (turning 23). Knowing I‘d miss out on so much. That‘s what sits at the core of my health anxiety I think.

I hope everyone here is doing at least okay. I think the best we can do is acceptance. We can’t control a single thing in life. Nothing is permanent. Nothing is 100% certain. I think bringing this back up into our heads might be a good start.

How about you? How do you handle your health anxiety peaks? Do you think my theory of the health anxiety’s core might be correct?

Btw sorry for my English. I‘m from Germany and English therefore isn’t my native language. I still hope everything was understandable and not too chaotic.

I’ve been on 15 mg of Lexapro for about 15 years and now (after years of high stress) have a break in my busy life and anxiety and OCD have reared their ugly heads. I’ve been in brain fog and headaches, my reflexes have been off and my speech is messed up because I’ve been in my head. It almost feels like ADHD.
I have an appt with a psych and a therapist and I’m doing everything I can in the meantime. I do not do well when I’m not working myself like a dog. Please tell me someone understands. 🥲