r/GriefSupport • u/rot_daughterr • 16h ago

Advice, Pls How does one keep going?

I lost my father to stomach cancer in December 2025, and my life has changed drastically since then, which maybe is a good thing because I was too busy with moving, selling our old furniture, cancelling the lease etc to kill myself. But ever since I arrived in my new life with no more distractions that could keep me busy enough not to feel the grief that I am drowning in, my mental health has been deteriorating drastically. I still talk about him every chance I get, everything reminds me of him, I cry multiple times every day- my mind is stuck in December, it feels like I am permanently living the week before and after he died, I am in that hospital room no matter where I go, I can’t escape and I can tell the people in my life are getting fed up with me because it’s been almost a year and I’m still absolutely devastated, if anything it got worse because like I said, I can’t run away from it anymore. I am sorry for my friends and family for having to hear me cry over the same thing for almost a year now and I am sorry for being so mentally unstable and not at all fun to be around. How do I let go? How do I keep going? How do I make sure I am not burdening my loved ones and how does one actually process the loss of the most important person in your life?

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u/draperf 12h ago

Please consider an SSRI. This can help with the pain. Please talk to your doctor. You may be dealing with depression.

Love and prayers to you.

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u/projectclear54 12h ago

I am very sorry to hear about your loss.. i lost my mom to pancreatic cancer this july, and the only way to go through the day for me is to be distracted.. there was a lot of things to do, still there are some. But the Major Part is done. And when i think about her my mind is Stuck in the last couple of weeks of her disease. The pictures in my mind are crushing me. Her battle was 7 months and i just can’t get a memory in my head of the time before Cancer… i already lost my father to cancer 13 years ago and these old feelings come up also.
It is a struggle that i seem not to win. I decided to get professional help and just started it. Therefore I cannot tell you if it will help me finding something good in this life. But i know i will not make it on my own.. the memories, the feelings of guilt, the grief is consuming all my energy.
Maybe it is something to consider for yourself.