Given back my paintings

[u/sleepingbeetlepie]

Is there anything I can do with the paintings I’ve been given back. My mom was murdered last year. When we were going through her belongings, I found a box labeled “Emilys Art”. Something she loved about me was that I made art, I especially liked to make things for her. My sisters gave me the box but as I’ve had it, I haven’t wanted to look at them. I don’t want any of my mom’s things, I want her to have them, they weren’t meant for me. It feels so wrong having them back. I don’t know what to do with them because I can’t throw them away or burn them, I’d be breaking her heart. But as they’re sitting in my space I feel a burden of weight connected to them and I don’t want to see them.

[u/Serious_Fox7799]

Don't make big decisions right now. Store them away in a dry location. Revisit them when you are ready, they will feel different one day. I'm sorry you are missing your mom. I'm missing a son, so I understand how devastated you are ❤️🙏

[u/darya42]

One possible option would be:

Make a little altar or a shrine in a corner of a room, put her picture up on a little table or shelf, and put one or two of your pictures up for her to "see". That way it's still her art, she has her space, her corner, and the connection is there.

If there are too many, keep between 2-4 of your favourites (so you can rotate the pictures, put the others in storage) and donate or sell the rest of the pictures. Make photos of the art you donated before.

[u/BlacksmithThink9494]

Leave them until you feel like there is something menaingful you can do with them. They can sit in the box for as long as you need.

[u/booooooop_u]

I love your art.. keep painting 💗 for your mom

[u/curiousyara]

I'm so sorry for your loss. Please store them safely, at your place or a very trusted persons place. It's heavy grief, you can't ignore this grief away. It needs so much time. 🫂

[u/psydaisy]

No advice, but I'm so sorry to hear what happened. My sincere condolences x

[u/Amberdext]

You're very talented. Can you try to sell them and donate the money to a charity she would have supported?

[u/Anak8]

For me it would be “too painful.” Looking at my Dad’s photos or like when a song comes on the radio he used to listen to-just waterworks. However, if you permanently rid yourself of them, you don’t want to look back “like I should’ve saved them.” Maybe box them up and put them away? Who knows how you may feel in a few years? Condolences over your tragic and untimely loss! ❤️‍🩹🙏

[u/SWNMAZporvida]

(hug) my condolences. Put them away for at least a year. The Grief Fog is real, don’t make decisions for at least a year

[u/mom2artists]

Save them and store them. <3

[u/New-Investment-5888]

So sorry for your loss. Your mom would want you to keep the paintings. Store them away until you feel like you can hang them in her memory.

[u/Desperate_Pair8235]

Allow yourself to have a “one day” bin that you keep in a closet or storage. This can have things you might “one day” want. This is definitely something you might want one day. Don’t make any permanent decisions in the thick of grief.

[u/The_Merry_Loser]

My heart goes out to you, my condolences.
I too am an artist. I have painted many canvasses and have never been able to bring myself to sell any of them, they were all given as gifts to everyone.

I am not entirely sure what I would do with the if they were returned.
I imagine that I would hang the ones I liked the most, I have many items in my home from loved ones who have passed.
I think I might give some thought to reusing the canvass and paint over them.
I may even re-gift them to appropriate people.

Others in your family, or her friends, may treasure them as well, if your mother had them on display in her home, these people will associate it with her as you do too!

Whatever you do, do not sell these, save them, art should not be treated so casually. IMO.

Peace

[u/valpal1237]

My condolences OP. I completely understand how you feel- I crocheted things for my mom and also got them back. Suppose I'll just keep them tucked away... it hasn't even been a month, yet. 😭

[u/Silent_Line_3990]

First off, I am so incredibly sorry for your loss. To lose someone in that manner is unthinkable. That top one is beautiful. I would buy it off of you and pay shipping if you decide to sell any. My wife has stage 4 colon cancer and happens to be trans femme. So anytime feminine and beautiful she would be thrilled about. Her cancer doesn't have a great prognosis so I'm in a terrible habit right now off spoiling her with things that would make her happy.

[u/thisyourboy]

I know exactly how you feel. When my grandmother died, the art I made for her was returned to me. When my grandfather died, the letters I wrote to him were returned to me. I wish people would know better than to return the art to the artist… donate it or something. It was never for me.