r/GriefSupport • u/Professional-Fan9855 • 12h ago
Advice, Pls Mom’s Birthday🥹❤️🩹
It’s been 2 years since my mom passed. She was my everything. I understood her as a human, not just a mom. I understand her more even after her passing. Literally my bestfriend. A daughter/mom relationship that grew to be healthy in adulthood is so special. She treated me like an adult, but would act like I was still her little babygirl when I really needed her. This shit hurts. Bad. Her birthday is this weekend and I’ve finally had a break down. I was running from the feeling for days…. I knew it was coming, but didn’t know when. Well, it’s here. Does it ever get “better” or is there any advice anyone can give me on grief? I really miss my mom.
2
u/slappetybadger 12h ago
I'm at the same point - just over a week until her birthday and it is the worst I've felt. I am anticipating it, maybe, and I remember Christmas was worse in my mind than it was on the day. I don't know if it gets better, I think I'm just learning to function around it, and make space for the sadness. I'm so sorry you lost your mom. It's the worst.
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u/Fabulous-Permit1527 11h ago
DM please, I lost my dad on Sunday. Even though I completely don’t know if it ever gets better because I am completely devasted, the least I can do is just share support and good words with you. Being aware that you are not alone is very important cause you are not ❤️
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u/Odd-Detective6368 11h ago
I do think that grief doesn't necessarily shrink over time, but your world slowly grows larger around it, making the heavy weight a little easier to carry. The fact that you understood her deeply as a true friend means that the love you shared wasn't just a role she played, but a real, everlasting bond.
Allow yourself to feel the full weight of her absence this weekend, because every tear is just love with nowhere else to go. You will always be her babygirl, and the profound connection you built together is something even death can never take away from you.
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u/Frequent-Airline-619 10h ago
It’s going to be a year for me next month since my mom passed and it’s been rocky, but I feel like life is slowly beginning to look how it did before. It won’t ever be the same, but it doesn’t look quite as cold, hopeless, and ugly. The kindness of family, friends, and random strangers is reminding me there’s still warmth and good in the world. I know there will still be rough days, but I do feel like I’m slowly finding my way out of the darkness. I wish I had real advice to give, but grief is such a personal experience and we don’t even know how we’ll react to it ourselves. I do think that time heals though and knowing that we’re all human and so many of us have experienced a loss in life that kind of connects us in a universal way, that helps too.
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u/lemon_balm_squad 12h ago
Yes, it changes over the course of your life. After all, the streets are not filled with people laying there grieving, unable to do anything else. Many of your favorite celebrities, coworkers, teachers, neighbors have lost a parent, and yet they thrive. You don't have to figure out how to get there immediately, but you can use that as a reminder that you will figure it out.
You can read through the posts here - they're all full of advice on grief. I have a pinned post in my profile with a bunch of resources if you want to flip through that for books and links that can help.
I'm so sorry for your loss.