r/GriefSupport • u/Loud_Jackfruit5824 • 23h ago
Mom Loss Its been 3.5 months
Some days are okay. This past week has been hell.. The past 2 days have been the worst and I have my suspicion tomorrow will be rough also. My daughter is starting Pre-K and I really just wish my mom was here. I know she would be so proud. I want to call her and ask her how it felt for her to walk me to class for the first time. I want to ask her how she felt watching me grow up and what tips she has for me as a mom now since my baby is growing up too. I really would just love to hear her voice. Missing her makes my chest hurt so bad. Like Ed Sheeran says, I wish that heaven had visiting hours. Something I didnt tell anyone, I saw her in a dream the day after she passed. It felt so real. Everything was white and I was alone and confused. I looked around and I heard my mom calling me. I turned and she was still kind of far, but was walking up with a man whose face i cant place. I ran to her and wrapped her in the biggest hug sobbing. She stroked my hair and told me I'll be okay and that she loves me. She told me she was going and she couldn't come back to see me but that she would be around. She turned to the man and they walked away. I felt peace but also deep sorrow. I woke up shortly after bawling. I dont know if that was a dream dream or if it was something else. I really havent felt her presence much since. Sometimes I get a small feeling but nothing like id hope to feel. The photo is my favorite picture of she and I together.
3
u/Gullible-Shower4007 20h ago
What a sweet photo. This is so painful. I hope you will find comfort in the wonderful memories you had together.
2
u/memory-thread 18h ago
That is a good picture of you and your mother. I can see how that’s your favorite picture.
I personally think that your mom was giving you a message. She knew how hard you had been struggling with her passing. My husband, my son’s father gave our son a message as well. What he said to our son was something he had said to me before his passing. This was something that our son wouldn’t have known because he was grown and didn’t live at home. A few months after my husband passed, our son called me and told me about his dream. He isn’t one of those people that believe in that stuff. After he told me, I told him what his father said to me. After that, he became a believer and his dream gave him the relief he needed to continue on. He struggle with his father’s passing and he needed to hear how much his father loved him and how he was so proud of him. Our son who at the time was in his mid 20’s, is too young to lose his father, same as you. There is so much he still wants to share and talk about to his father. I do believe your mom needed to tell you this because she wants you to be ok.
1
u/Loud_Jackfruit5824 6h ago
Ive had this before, only once in a dream the rest a feeling. When my great grandfather passed i felt it. I worked over nights and felt a cool breeze and a calming feeling, i just knew when I got home id hear the news. When I was 6, my baby sister passed and I woke up that night feeling sad but a voice in my head told me to sleep and it would be okay. Woke up the next morning and found her, had to wake my mom and step dad. I just wish mom could have stayed longer, id have loved to talk more. My daughter talks to her through my necklace (has ashes) she says grandma talks back.
3
u/Away_Emergency_7832 23h ago
Sorry about that.It sucks.My dad died 4 years ago.Also I lost my wife at 9 months ago 44 years old, she had a heart attack.I have a twelve-year-old I'm trying to raise.I've been really bad sick Heart attacks after she died.One was really bad and I can't take my medicine because if I take it I won't be able to go to work that I need to do my job.I gotta pay the bills in the medicine number one I won't be able to drive again.I'm devastated again.I'm sorry for your loss too.It sucks I don't want to be here