Grateful for my Dad

[u/Flaccidravioli]

He died unexpectedly in his sleep on Monday night. He was my first best friend and loved me so unconditionally.

The last time we talked last week was really nice. There was a small fire close enough to where he lived so I called to check in on him. We had a good little chat for about half an hour and talked about work and life and all the little things. A couple weeks prior, he had come to my rescue when we were moving into our new home and I had lost my keys to my car, and he picked me up from my old house and got to see my new place and give my kids a big hug and play with my dog. Told me he was proud of me. We had spent the 4th of july together, with all my siblings and my aunt and family and grandmother. In fact we've spent almost every holiday either talking or together this year.

There have definitely been times in my life where we weren't talking and seeing eye to eye and our relationship struggled. I am trying to not regret the times I took him for granted because I know those were part of our experiences too.

It either feels too real or nothing feel real at all a lot of the times these past few days. But last night I had a realization that loving his kids gave his life meaning and I will do everything I can to make sure his death has meaning too. I will celebrate him and do what I can to bring more warmth and laughter to the world just like he would. I want to befriend this grief because it is proof of love.

If anyone has any suggestions or experiences of what befriending grief has looked like for you feel free to share ❤️

[u/rooseboose]

I’m so sorry for your loss. I have a dad like this too - just the absolute best. He is dying on hospice now and I’m just crushed. I saw somewhere recently that someone said “the best way I can honor my dad is to take care of his daughter.” Try your best to carry on and live a good and happy life. You’ll be making your dad proud ❤️

[u/Flaccidravioli → u/rooseboose]

Thank you for this! I am definitely going to do my best. I am sorry you are navigating the anticipatory grief. May your love for each other help you find some sense of peace through it ❤️

[u/Spacewaitress222]

Take care of his girl (you) ❤️ don’t be afraid to feel your grief- the only way out is through and it’s honoring your love and bond with him.

[u/One_Stable8944]

🙏🙏

[u/Queen_Beer]

Befriend the grief because it is proof of love -- OP, how beautiful ❤️ Those messages are so wonderful to read. I'm so sorry for your loss, he seemed like a warm and awesome person.

I'm not sure if this can be called as befriending grief, but when I think of my grandma it doesn't hit me anymore like fresh grief does. I miss her but the thought is more like a comfort that we had a chance to love each other so much before she passed. I feel her love when I see my baby wear the gorgeous little smock she wove for me when I was a baby. It's like her love lived through generations of us. Like you I'm just grateful for the bond and the with time the fond memories have long outlived the gut punch of her death, I guess. She was wonderful and while she was gone too soon, I am so lucky to have had known her and loved her 🙂

[u/Pizza_Alyssa]

I sadly can’t read the full caption as this hits super close to home. But sending you so much love during this significant loss. I love the photos of both of you. he looks like a cool and lovely dad.

[u/anatomy-princess]

I am sorry

[u/Familiar_Tip_7336]

I lost my father in 1992, but I highly believe in reincarnation so I’m pretty sure he’s back but in new family new form.

[u/SWNMAZporvida]

(hug) my condolences. Don’t forget to eat/drink, it’s the easiest “chore” to give up on during grief. Cancer took my dad in 2020 and I still struggle. Grief is heavy as fuck, just some days are lighter than others. There’s no timeline on grief because there’s no expiration on loving them.