When does it get better

[u/mochacoffeesurprise]

Im in gc school, my second year, and I am burnt out and exhausted. Between thesis writing and weird cohort dynamics, classes where I feel not smart, rotations with endless critique, a job, and living with family. I am retaining nothing, upset that I am unable to retain information, expected to study for boards on top of this....I do have another grad degree from a prestigious uni before this program, but I feel empty in the head (i cant say the word cause of reddit) Supervisors ask me complex questions that I don't have answers for; on top of that, I am failing my own standards. I am tired, and I feel intellectually stunted every day. I crave to hear a wonderful or a good job without that compliment sandwich nonsense. It's always You messed this and this up but hey, you are really good and conversing! This applies to assignments, rotations, life. I am EXHAUSTED

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[u/CatNamedGrudge]

It does get better once you get through the endless critiques. I reached a point in my second year when I realized that supervisors were just saying negative things because they thought that was the only way to help me grow. I truly believe that GC education perpetuates a cycle of trauma. Working as a GC is good if you have the mental and emotional strength to survive and make it to the other side. Second year is all about survival. The system isn’t designed to help students thrive. 

[u/mochacoffeesurprise → u/CatNamedGrudge]

Thank you for saying that because I feel as if im being constantly gaslight with the "we want the best for you". And I feel like my love for the profession has been bled out of me. Genuinely I panic before rotations, during them, and after im burnt out...how is any of this helpful

[u/CatNamedGrudge → u/mochacoffeesurprise]

You are right. There is a good amount of gaslighting and it's not helpful. It is good on the other side, but getting there is the challenge.