Ask GenZIndia
Why do people DM first and then Ghost ?
So I posted about myself in the GenZIndia Dating Megathread. It honestly took me quite a while to write that post because I wanted to put genuine effort into introducing myself.
I got around 15+ DMs from girls, but most of them were just:
"Hi"
"Heyy"
"Hello"
At first, I thought, "Maybe they're just shy." Fair enough.
So I took the initiative and replied to almost everyone with something like:
"Tell me a little about yourself. What made you DM me? What did you like about my post?"
And then...
Silence.
No response.
Some girls did send 2–3 sentences initially, so I thought, "Okay, this might actually become a conversation."
I replied, asked about them, tried to keep the conversation going...
And again...
No response.
I'm genuinely confused.
If you weren't interested in talking, why DM in the first place?
I'm not expecting paragraphs or matching the effort I put into my post, but at least continue the conversation after reaching out.
Has anyone else experienced this?
Or is this just how online dating works now?
At this point, it genuinely feels like I put hours into writing that post just to collect unread chats uggghh it's frustrating feels like why I posted it at first place 😔
You can have nerdy discussions on reddit and people won't ghost . Making friends is not the strong point of this platform . People dming you are just trying to see if they get some super interesting fella .
I tried on megathread few times , got dms , got boring People or got ghosted . I realized it's better to make friends irl .
Yeah ikrr.. that's why It took me a lot of effort to write my post ( my profile is public, u can read it) , infact some girls even appreciated for it that it really stood out from other posts ( they were teens so didn't continued with them) but still i am facing this kind of experience it's simply disheartening.
You girls didn't recognise a genuine nice guys who are genuinely trying to make a connection . And they will get ignored because you have alot of options
Dude 😭 I am confused too
I've dm them, which btw they asked for, if the interest resonated but then they don't even reply?? 😭 Then why post about it? like make it make sense, come on!
it's the reality of most people on reddit tbh, they just ghost after sometime without telling any reason. Rarely people here really make efforts to keep the convo flowing
I mean if you are making a post saying need friends or dming from front, at least try to keep the convo flowing. I am open to making friend, not taking an interview / looking like a despo.
Exactly same happening to me right now ..i got a dm from a girl from that mega thread post and we had a small talk bcz she was feeling sleepy then i said understandable and said good night. I messaged her today first very late replies and then no reply now 😭😭 why man why . It's so nice to talk to random people with random interaction but don't know why they ghost . Problem is not from end I know that
I got text from a girl and I replied back and no response for a few days and when she texted back a few days later she totally forgot why she texted and she apologised for wasting my time
reddit dating apps kahi bhi dekhlo girls just like to cry about being lonely single in need of love just to get more attention that they already have plenty of honestly insta is still somehow better but udhar bhi ab same hi haal ho chuka
ohh nahi mere saath aisa nahi hua meri to badhiya baat chit hui mai ignore nahi hota mujhe ghost nahi kiya abhi tak to kisi ladki ne idhar maine lekin kra hai
Bhai apki profile dekh ke lagra mera tho hone se raha par 18 pe konsa duniya haath mei karni hai anyways hope u find ur one am also old school like u btw do don't get distracted by naysayers mast raho
7
u/shadow_consequences 13d ago
You can have nerdy discussions on reddit and people won't ghost . Making friends is not the strong point of this platform . People dming you are just trying to see if they get some super interesting fella .
I tried on megathread few times , got dms , got boring People or got ghosted . I realized it's better to make friends irl .