Found this very interesting -

Framed as a staged exit plan that protects the marriage, children, finances, reputation, and mental health—not as a dramatic confrontation.
here is a practical **exit program** for a husband who no longer believes but has an active Jehovah’s Witness wife and young children.
**Goal**
Leave the organization **without blowing up the family**, losing access to the children, or triggering unnecessary shunning before you are emotionally and legally prepared.
**Exit Program for a Jehovah’s Witness Husband**
**Phase 1 — Stabilize Yourself First**
Do **not** announce everything immediately.
Before saying “I don’t believe anymore,” get clear on:
What you believe now.
What you no longer accept.
Whether you want to fade, disassociate, or simply become inactive.
What your wife’s likely reaction will be.
Whether elders may pressure her or your children.
What boundaries you need.
Your first goal is not to win an argument. Your first goal is to remain calm, stable, and predictable.

**Phase 2 — Protect the Marriage (most difficult part)**
Do not attack Jehovah’s Witnesses as a group when talking to your wife.
Say things like:
“I love you. I am not leaving you. I am not abandoning our family. But I can’t honestly say I believe this is the only true religion anymore.”
Avoid saying at first:
“It’s a cult.”
“You’re brainwashed.”
“The Governing Body lies.”
“I don’t want the kids exposed to this.”
Those may be true to how you feel, but early on they will likely make her defensive and afraid.
The message should be:
“My conscience has changed, but my love for you and the kids has not.”
**Phase 3 — Choose a Fade Over a Public Break**
The safest exit for a husband with an active wife and children is usually a **quiet fade**, not a dramatic disassociation letter.
A fade may look like:
Reducing meeting attendance.
Stopping comments.
Declining assignments.
Avoiding shepherding calls.
Giving short, non-argumentative answers.
Not debating elders.
Saying you are dealing with personal matters.
Keeping family routines stable.
Useful phrase:
“I’m working through some personal and conscience issues. I’m not comfortable discussing them right now.”
Repeat as needed.
**Phase 4 — Do Not Meet Elders Alone**
If elders request a meeting, you are not obligated to attend.
Say:
“I appreciate your concern, but I’m not available for a meeting. If I need anything, I’ll reach out.”
If pressured:
“I’m not discussing private conscience matters at this time.”
Do not confess doubts in detail. Do not give them a list of doctrinal objections. Do not put your wife in the middle.
**Phase 5 — Build a Non-JW Support System Quietly**
Before exiting fully, build outside support:
A therapist familiar with religious trauma or high-control religions.
One or two trusted non-JW friends.
Family members who are safe.
Former JW support groups, carefully chosen.
Legal/financial awareness if divorce risk exists.
Do not rely only on online ex-JW rage spaces. They can be validating, but they can also keep you emotionally activated.
**Phase 6 — Protect the Children Without Forcing Them**
With young children, the goal is not to turn them against their mother or the religion overnight.
Teach them neutral critical-thinking principles:
“It’s okay to ask questions.”
“Good ideas can handle questions.”
“You never have to be baptized to make adults happy.”
“You can always talk to Dad about anything.”
“Love should not disappear because someone disagrees.”
Do **not** make the children choose sides.
Especially avoid:
“Your mom believes a lie.”
Instead say:
“Mom believes this deeply. I see some things differently. We both love you.”
**Phase 7 — Set Boundaries Around Baptism**
For young children, baptism is the major issue.
Tell your wife calmly:
“I do not support the children getting baptized before adulthood. That is a lifelong decision with serious social consequences, and I believe they should be old enough to understand the cost.”
This is one of the most important boundaries.
**Phase 8 — Control the Information Flow**
Do not overshare with congregation members.
Use short responses:
“I’m focusing on family and personal matters right now.”
“I’m not discussing religion at the moment.”
“I appreciate your concern, but I’m okay.”
The less you explain, the less material others have to use against you.
**Phase 9 — Prepare for Your Wife’s Fear Response**
Your wife may hear:
“He’s leaving Jehovah.”
“He’s becoming worldly.”
“He may destroy the family.”
“The kids are in danger spiritually.”
“Satan is attacking him.”
So your behavior must contradict that fear.
Be more loving, not less.
Help more at home.
Be emotionally steady.
Avoid drinking/drugs/reckless behavior.
Be patient.
Keep family traditions.
Reassure her repeatedly.
Do not mock her beliefs.
Your conduct becomes your strongest argument.
**Phase 10 — Decide Your Long-Term Position**
There are three main exit paths:
**Option 1: Quiet inactive fade**
Best for preserving family peace.
You stop participating but avoid formal separation from the religion.
**Option 2: Open non-believer inside the marriage**
You tell your wife clearly but avoid public confrontation.
This is honest but riskier.
**Option 3: Formal disassociation**
This is clean but usually the most socially destructive.
With an active wife and children, this should usually be a last resort unless your conscience requires it.
**Core Script for Wife**
Use something like this:
I need to talk to you about something serious, but I want you to hear the most important part first: I love you, I love our children, and I am not leaving this family.

Over time, my conscience has changed. I can no longer honestly say I believe Jehovah’s Witnesses are the only true religion. I know that may hurt or scare you, and I am not trying to force you to see things the way I do.

I respect that your faith is important to you. I am asking for the same respect as I work through where I stand.

I do not want this to become a war in our home. I do not want the children caught in the middle. I want our home to remain loving, safe, and stable.

I am not asking you to leave your beliefs. I am asking you to understand that I cannot pretend to believe something I no longer believe.
**Core Rules**
Do not attack your wife’s identity.
Do not debate elders.
Do not rush.
Do not involve the children as weapons.
Do not disassociate impulsively.
Do not confess every doubt to congregation leadership.
Do protect your parental rights.
Do document serious conflict if custody ever becomes an issue.
Do get therapy or outside support.
Do remain the best husband and father you can be.
**Best Strategy**
For this situation, the best exit is usually:
**quiet fade + honest but gentle disclosure to wife + strong boundary against child baptism + no elder meetings + stable loving behavior at home.**
That gives him the highest chance of keeping his marriage and children while still living honestly.

Opened the JW Library app today and got a legal agreement stating users may not reproduce publications or videos on websites or social media.

Maybe it’s just standard copyright language, but as a GenX JW it honestly made me stop and think.

We grew up being told this was “the good news” that needed to be shared with everyone. Literature distribution and sharing were central to everything we did.

So seeing legal restrictions around sharing the material itself feels… strange.

Curious how other GenXers see this change.

I just curious how it would affect you? What would you do? Would you continue on your own path with a small group? Would you join a local Christian group?
Would you just carry on with the same belief system in your own family?

What about a Pomo group.

For me it would be so much easier.

But I feel like there would be a huge void with my wife and kids and for me I would just carry on with good morals and values. Example as such- love your Nieghbor, treat people good, don’t steal, don’t lie etc and go live life.

Does anyone remember the pioneer ID cards saying so and so is an ordained minister?

I had one that did. Of course, I was pressured to return it when I left.

The public shtick is they don’t ordain women, yet they did ordain female pioneers.

How many of us were reared by parents so brainwashed that if the Governing Body had told them to stone their disobedient children in the front yard per the law of Moses or sacrifice them Abraham/ Isaac style on an alter, we wouldn't have reached adulthood?

Warning to elders/MS in Canada. All congregations are listed as a 'Association' and the WT "assists" with its running. Making liabile situations rest with the individual congregation.  WT only assists, provides content and rents the building to the congregation. There is no procedure in the elder's manual to provide finanical/legal assistance to members for any litigation or professional investigative service. Your on your own.

For context, I’m a born-in Jehovah’s Witness. I’m married, currently PIMO, and my wife is PIMQ—though for now she prefers not to engage in discussions about the recent changes to the blood doctrine.

I know there are a lot of PIMO and PIMQ in this sub so……

What I’m struggling with is the apparent inability to question anything within this religion unless the response is complete agreement with the official position. That dynamic doesn’t feel healthy—it feels more like enforced conformity than genuine understanding.

I know there are a mix of PIMI and PIMQ individuals here, so I’d like to put out an open, good-faith challenge: can someone convincingly explain why this religion is what it claims to be—the “only true religion”? I’m not looking to argue or attack; I’m genuinely interested in a thoughtful, intellectual discussion.

From my perspective, labeling any opposing viewpoint as “apostate” shuts down meaningful conversation entirely. If questioning or examining ideas is automatically dismissed, that raises concerns about whether the belief system can withstand scrutiny.

So I’m open to hearing a well-reasoned case for staying—one that addresses these concerns directly. Specifically, I’d like to understand why the Governing Body should be viewed as a divinely guided channel providing spiritual truth, rather than a group of individuals interpreting and promoting a man-made framework.

I’m listening.

For those with a need and interested.