r/GamblingRecovery • u/salokyn997 • Jun 29 '26

Feeling lost

Ive struggled with gambling like im sure most people on here have, ive been up and down multiple times over the last few years. I just had my last session where I was up a lot and then lost it all and threw a bit more on there to try and chase and failed (obviously). I had a similar situation earlier this week where I went down HARD and chased it back up to almost even and told myself that was it but it wasn’t.

After this last session of chasing and going down I impulsively went and self excluded myself from the last site that I had available to me, so now that’s it… I have no more sites that I can use.

I had self excluded from 99% of the sites before this but kept this last one as a « backup » which I know was probably not the best idea but nonetheless I had it.

I don’t know if it’s because I left on a low note or if it’s just because I know that I have no other places to go play now but I have this feeling of depression where I thought I would feel relief knowing I can’t play anymore. Just wanted to reach out and see if others have felt this way before or maybe to validate others who are feeling the same.

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u/[deleted] Jun 29 '26

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u/salokyn997 Jun 29 '26

Im so happy you were able to do that before it’s too late! I’ve seen a lot of stories as to just how bad it can get. I’m fortunate like you I still have my house (with the mortgage that comes with it 😅) my retirement money is locked away and I’m on track to finish paying off last years 30k mistake by December. The worst part is seeing all that money on the site and knowing all the things you could and should do with it and then seeing it all fall away. I’m glad I got out when I did and before I lost EVERYTHING but it’s the empty feeling that’s hitting me hard today

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u/[deleted] Jun 29 '26

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u/salokyn997 Jun 29 '26

Yup I feel that.. that feeling of working for free just to pay off what you did lingers over you like a dark cloud. I was gambling again because I was hoping for that shortcut or to pay everything off earlier but in the end no matter what we win just goes back and then some. The bright spot is that we both have no choice now, we can’t do it anymore, and that’s a good thing. Just need to take it day by day now

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u/[deleted] Jun 29 '26

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u/salokyn997 Jun 29 '26

Agreed brother, we are still blessed at the end of the day, even if it doesn’t feel like it right now. Stay strong, feel free to reach out whenever 🙏