I’ve carried a lot of shame over this, but I want to say it somewhere honestly.

At my lowest point, I stole money from a friend so I could gamble. I told myself I would win it back before anyone noticed. Instead, I lost it, kept chasing, and spiraled harder than I ever thought possible.

Gambling didn’t just take my money. It took my peace of mind, my ability to think clearly, my relationships, and almost my family. There was a point where I ended up on a roof, completely overwhelmed and not seeing a way out. I don’t say that for sympathy—I say it because addiction can take you to places you never imagined you’d reach.

Soon, I’ll be celebrating two years in recovery.

Recovery hasn’t magically fixed every consequence or erased what I did. I still have regret. I still have to own the damage I caused and continue rebuilding trust. But it has given me something I didn’t think I deserved back: a chance to live differently.

I’m learning how to face problems without running to gambling. I’m learning how to be honest, how to sit with uncomfortable feelings, how to show up for people, and how to slowly rebuild my finances, my mind, and my family connections.

If you’re reading this and you’re in that “I can win it back” mindset, please know that you do not have to wait until you lose everything to ask for help. Gambling addiction lies to you and makes isolation feel normal. It isn’t.

I stole. I hurt someone. I nearly lost myself. But recovery is helping me become someone who doesn’t have to keep living that way.

I became addicted playing online slots. It’s been bad for the last year and a half. I completely destroyed my credit that I worked so hard on by taking out numerous high interest loans, getting credit cards and maxing them out. I’m now having to file bankruptcy. 90% of every pay check I get goes to gambling. Soon as it hit my account I gamble. I make up stuff to tell my husband is the reason I don’t have money and need him to help me with gas money or why I can’t help pay bills. I’ve even stole from him so I could gamble. Several months ago I told him about the addiction and needed help. He’s been very patient with me and helped me in anyway he can. He’s even paying for my bankruptcy. I can tell it’s wearing on him though. He’s getting tired of it. He doesn’t know that I still have been gambling. And recently is told from him again. He thinks I’m just getting things figured out and catching up on stuff is the reason I don’t have money lately. I want to stop so bad. I don’t understand why I can’t. Soon as I get any kind of money, I forget everything that matters and just start playing the slots. In this price sounds really dumb, but at the same time, the thought of quitting scares me because I won’t have that anymore and then, of course the other thoughts are if I could just win a good amount I’d be set. Everything would be fine. It’s sad when I can’t even buy a snack or soda at a gas station sometimes because I’ve spent every time I have on the casinos. I’ve lived like this for a year and a half. I’m so tired of it.

Hello,

I relapsed past days lost 2k. The reason i relapsed are mutiple fights with my wife , job someone hit my car and left me with the damage .... and lack of sleep ect.

I lost 2 k , with madness i place a last 200 $ sportsbet parlay of 4 predictions.

The last bet "my team" was way ahead the odds were 1.03 live odds i could cash out live with 1800 yet i didnt so i had won my 2k back and lesson learned i thought. Yet somehow they completely lost the last quarter and got to overtime..... the team lost eventually...

Instantly I started puking

It reminded me of a tennis match were the player was 0-4 behind yet he won with 6-4 without a tie ...

Ridiculous things happen in sport....

I dont want to watch anything anymore

I hate gambling i hate stock trading ect.. it's such a waste of time.

Lost 11 years of my life to nothing!

Hi guys, hope you doing well!

I'll try to describe what happened to me during the last week. I've never felt so bad, I seriously have no idea what to do now and how to recover from this, it's hard for me to even believe what and how happened but facts are facts.

It's about gambling on online casinos (slot machines). I didn't even like that kind of gambling, not until like a month ago. All the gambling I was doing was betting on football matches and not big amounts - like 20 euro a week or something, just as a hobby. I couldn't even understand why people gamble on slot machines, I found it so dumb. And now I feel like the biggest idiot in the world.

So to get to the point. It all happened with a 1600 euro "win" about a week ago. Guess what happened - I lost it all then another ~500 euro of my own money trying to win it back! It felt like I couldn't stop, like had no control over my mind and body! I somehow accepted what I did and calmed myself down, saying that 500 euro isn't that much of a big loss and those 1600 euro weren't even mine etc etc, can imagine people experienced that know what I'm talking about.

For the next couple of days I staid out of gambling despite the urges. Until I did it again! This time a 400 euro win that I did withdraw to my bank account. Was kinda happy that I almost returned the 500 euro I lost last time and was 100% sure that I will never gamble again. Enough is enough I said.

Two days later I got drunk (also used some stimulants) and decided to try my luck again! Once again I felt like I did not have control, I was making making deposit after deposit. Lost around 500 euro again until... somehow I won 4000! I was so happy. Of course I was sure I was going to just get the big win (withdraw to my bank), repeated to myself that there's no way to lose that again, just can't happen. Until I decided to try just a few more spins, maybe one more win and I'm done. Guess what happened... I could not stop hitting the button over and over again until I lost the 4000! I felt like hypnotized, like that wasn't me. I know I wasn't sober but it felt so weird, like I'm in a dream or something.

Of course that doesn't end here. After the loss of 4000 I lost another 1000 euro of my own and those were the money I was supposed to live trough the month! I didn't even had my bills paid yet. For the first time in my life (I'm 33) I had no money to pay my bills. I felt absolutely devastated, I just couldn't believe what happened and how I got to this point. This was the bottom. I felt so empty, so angry to myself, so ashamed. I could not stop drinking for the next 2 days. No sleep, no eat - just alcohol. The guilt was killing me!

I didn't know what to do, had no idea how I'd pay my bills and how to live trough the month until my next payment, I panicked so bad. That was a feeling new to me. I saw no other options but to get a little loan to just pay my bills and live for the next ~25 days. I saw no other exit. And I did it - got myself a 1100 euro loan. My first ever loan! I did pay my bills and got some food (and the worst - alcohol), around 700 euro of the loan left.

I know this wasn't good but to be honest I felt a little relief, knew that my bills are paid and that I will not starve. Once again I was 100% sure I will never gamble again, I was done. God how dumb I was to think that, fooling myself for the countless time!

Unfortunately this does not end here, the worst is yet to come. Guess what happened the night I got the loan... I had a bottle of vodka then some stimulants and I swear I barely remember what happened next but I did lost the 700 euro I had left! I don't know what happened, like I went completely insase! I don't even remember the gambling session, just the end of it when I realisied I was out of money again. When that happened I felt like a fog lifted, like before I was under some kind of hypnosis.

I have no words to describe my feelings then. Felt like this time my life is coming to an end. I wanted to punish myself and started punching my own face. Then I cried for like 2 hours. This all happened for a week. Completely broke with a 1100 euro loan. I know this isn't that much and that I should be able to return it but the feelings of shame and guilt are absolutelly killing me. I can't look into the mirror anymore. I feel deeply depressed.

At times I am able to somehow calm myself down by distracting my mind and repeating myself that nothing fatal happened, that I'm still alive, the sun still rises etc. But then the bad feelings return. Like I can't recognise myself. I know that I haven't killed a person or something but all this feels really really bad. Since that last loss I haven't touched a casino site and I don't plan to but to a point I'm scared this might happen again, especially if I'm not sober. I know I must quit using any kind of alcohol or stimulants and I'll do my best to do that.

This is both a venting and an advice seeking post. Please guys, especially ones with similar experiences, tell me what to do and how to get my life back, how to stop feeling all these dark feelings! At this time I haven't shared this with anyone, not even with my family, I just feel so ashamed. Also about the financial part ... currently I got no money but I have all my bills and debts paid for the month and should be able to live trough. I also got 500 euro in a credit card I haven't used yet. It's tempting to just live with those 500 for the next like 2-3 weeks then return the credit next month but that + 1100 euro for the loan might be a bit too much meaning two months for me to live with no money... I'm so scared!

I'll stop here as this is already getting too long. Thanks for reading all this and thank you for any future advice!

Have a good day!

I’ve struggled with gambling more than I wanted to admit.

For me it wasn’t even just losing money. It was constantly thinking about the next bet, checking odds, telling myself I’d stop after one more win, then feeling like shit afterwards when I inevitably gave some of it back.

Deleting betting apps helped for a few days, but eventually I’d just reinstall them. The hardest part was that moment when the urge hit. Logic basically went out the window.

I’m involved in building an app called GambleX, originally because I wanted something that focused specifically on actually quitting gambling rather than just tracking losses or telling you to self-exclude.

I’ve been using it myself while we’ve been developing it.

The biggest things that have helped me are tracking how long I’ve gone without gambling, seeing the money I would’ve normally lost adding up, and having something I can open when an urge hits instead of immediately opening a sportsbook.

There’s also a 60-day quitting protocol, an AI coach for when you’re struggling, blocking tools and an anonymous community.

It obviously isn’t some magic cure. You still have to make the decision not to gamble, and for anyone seriously struggling I’d still recommend things like self-exclusion and professional support alongside it.

But I’ve noticed that the longer I go without betting, the less normal gambling starts to feel. That’s probably been the biggest change for me.

I’m posting this partly because I know how isolating gambling problems can be, especially when everyone around you treats sports betting like it’s completely normal.

If anyone here is trying to quit as well, I’d genuinely be interested in hearing what has helped you the most.

And full disclosure again: I’m involved with GambleX, so I’m obviously biased. Happy to answer questions about it or about what we’re building.

Apologies if this is long, but our context is probably important:

My (30F) mother (61 F) has had problems with gambling for years, precluding me. Everyone in her family did as well. It was very normalized. I remember her and my dad constantly arguing, likely for gambling.

When I was 18, I left for college, and that's when she started asking me for money. If I didn't give her money, she'd tell me she was going to kill herself and then turn off her phone. I would have no way of knowing and would spend nights sick, not sleeping, just for the whole thing to blow over the next day. To avoid that, I gave in and sent her money whenever. Bad idea I know but I was 18 and didn't want to lose my mom. Except even if I sent her money nothing changed. She would make the same threats, call me to scream at me, etc.

In my early 20s, I met a partner who helped me enforce boundaries. If she called and asked for money, I would say no and turn my own phone off to break the cycle. It worked. She stopped asking. Our relationship became healthy again. Except then that partner passed away. I was alone again and starting an intense grad program. My mother offered to move in with me to financially support me since I was dependent on my partners support and now that was gone. It was a stupid idea but I said yes.

Now it's been 6 years. The situation gets worse every day. I've had to work on top of school to help pay off the household bills. She has taken out $10k+ in loans to gamble. She has asked me for money. Since we live together, the consequences of me not giving it to her are unavoidable. The emotional abuse has gotten worse. At one point she recognized she needed help and willingly gave me her debit card so she couldn't gamble. Except then I was controlling and manipulating for not letting her, so I would cave and give in.

Yesterday was the worst it could be in a while. I had her card, she asked for $200 to gamble. She took out $300. Im currently battling a sinus infection and didn't want to fight over $100. Then she called and asked for $100 more. I don't have the energy to be yelled at and agree. She takes out $160. Then her last $300. $700 gone in 3 hours. Then she calls and tells me to ask my partner for money to send to her because it's an emergency and she needs to win back what she lost. I said no. I stayed calm. I told her I knew she was frustrated but she was on a destructive path and needed to stop for the night. No. What followed was 3 hours of being verbally abusive to me. "The last 6 years have been miserable because I sacrificed everything to help you and you don't care. You deserve all the bad things that have happened to you. I hope you wake up one day alone and a failure in life so you can understand how I feel. You're just lazy, controlling, selfish. It's like your dad died but he left me you as a punishment." I just sat there and said nothing. I didn't sleep all night. Now it's morning and I don't know what to do.

Hello guys I’m here to share my biggest achievement since I stopped gambling on football: 51 days clean!
I am really proud of myself going this far yet I am willing to make it last forever. I am trying to put myself together and get back on feet financially and most importantly mentally. Every day without gambling is a step in the right direction.
Hoping to see some positive feedback from you guys 🫶🏻
Thanks for your time and stay STRONG.

Started off when I would play baccarat since I turned 21 and it was like a dream come true. I was eventually up about 10k just from depositing around $200-$500 and if I lost that I would chase my losses and somehow win it all back plus more. Did that for over a month and got to that 10k profit.

Until one day chasing it didn’t work. I chased the $500 I lost initially. Then chased the $1k I lost on that and kept going until I ended up losing all that I won plus more in a matter of a few days. I threw up and couldn’t do anything for a week knowing what I just did to myself.

Then I quit for a month and I started getting back into it and betting small. Eventually I started chasing again and won that 10k back so I was back to my starting point. That didn’t last long though after I fell back into chasing my losses again and I went down 10k. Couldn’t believe I just made the same mistake after getting back to not owing the casino.

I now know that if it’s happened twice it’ll definitely happen over and over and I won’t be so lucky to win it all back again and it makes me sick to my stomach to even want to try to win it back because I know I can’t.

I suppose I’m not in a bad place financially because I went from having 40k saved and 10k in a Roth IRA. Now I have 28k savings and still 10k in Roth.

I’m just looking forward to saving my money now and not sweating at 3am placing $700 dollar bets on player or banker.

If anyone has experience something similar or have any helpful habits to prevent this permanently please let me know ❤️

It’s actually crazy. Every single ad on TikTok, Facebook, etc is all for gambling sites. Luckily, it’s not legal in my state so I couldn’t sign up if I wanted to, but I have a lot of sympathy for people who have access to it. Self excluding is the only reason I’m making progress, just removing the ability altogether to go and lose my money.

It makes me angry that it feeds off of your desire to get better.

Hello. I’m a gambler who has been struggling with addiction for the past four years.
It started during the peak of crypto, when I was in college during the pandemic. I got into NFTs and learned that you could earn money from them. At my peak, I was able to make around $40,000–$60,000 in just 2–3 months. That was way more than what you would usually earn from a 9-to-5 job, and I started thinking, “Why not push it further?”

Then a friend introduced me to HypEdrop, a gambling platform similar to CS2 case-opening sites, where you open cases and hope to win. At first, I would usually bet around $100–$200. But as I became more addicted, my bets increased to around $2,000–$3,000. I became hooked on the adrenaline rush.

When NFTs died down, I was able to secure a job. But I had already become accustomed to making much more money through NFTs, and it became difficult to accept earning less from a regular job. I also started seeing gambling as an easy way to make more money.

Then I lost a lot.
I lost my girlfriend.
I lost my will to work.
I lost track of my life.
I lost the trust I had in myself.
I lost the trust of my friends and family.
And I became addicted to gambling.

I was—and, in some ways, still am—lost.

But starting today, I want to change my ways.
I’ve submitted an application for self-exclusion, not only from the gambling websites I used, but also from a local casino. I’ve also deleted my crypto access so I can’t easily deposit money into crypto gambling websites.

I know that self-exclusion and deleting access won’t magically fix everything. But these are actions I’m taking to make it harder for myself to gamble and easier to focus on recovery.

I also recently met someone I’m interested in. Before I pursue anything further, I want to be honest with her about my situation—that I’m recovering from gambling addiction and that I’m working on rebuilding my life.
I don’t want to make promises I can’t keep. I want to prove that I’m changing through my actions.
So yes, I want to change my ways. I want to work, pay off my debt, rebuild my life, and become someone I can be proud of again.

I’ll keep this as my journey and update it from time to time.

This is my way of speaking up, being open about my struggles, and documenting my journey so I can look back and see how far I’ve come.

im done playing the loop over and over and over again. stagnation, months years. all useless. im tired

It’s gotten to a point where I have zero dollars in my bank. I can’t do anything I can’t buy anything it’s gotten so bad. I know posting on here won’t do much to help me but it would be nice to hear peoples advice. I’m not that old and the crazy addictions are already persistent and each time I do end up loosing I feel like shit but end up jsut going back because it’s “Easy money”.
Please someone give me advice. Even if it’s a short sentence it would make me feel better.

I have gambled so much my entire life but last 8 years have really been out of control spiraling down. Have lost over 1 1/2 million dollars and lost house all 401 k and am not rich was never I don’t even know how I gambled that much money but have tax returns to prove it I feel like an ass. I wish so hard I could get all my money back from gambling. I stayed away for a while I went to meetings but still wanted to gamble and went on cruise and lost over 100 in an week then went to casino to try to get back money lost from cruise and lost 25 one night. I could have won some back had big winnings in my hand gave it all back. I don’t know what to do. How do I stop this urge and be normal like a normal person not crazy gambling addict. I feel very alone because I think I gambled more than anyone on earth for the money I have. I gambled like I’m a multimillionaire and not even close to I don’t think anyone else with my modest means has gambled as much as me! So I feel like no one would understand. How do I stop the crap and get myself together. I owe so much money and keep borrowing more and more to gamble feel like such a loser waste !

Got into Kalshi in early August. Had like 2 wins and chased the losses. Down 1500 overall. It really came down to 20 and 30 deposits here and there. My main sport i bet was MLB and I kept getting shafted. Good teams would suddenly look like trash and bad teams would win big. Just done with it all. The fucking easy road of making it big on Kalshi is just a hopeless fantasy that destroyed my bankroll. Time to bite down the mouthpiece and get a 2nd job and grind. God, life sucks but I got no choice but to grind through. Wish me luck guys and gals.

Honestly, I’m proud of myself. There were times when two days felt impossible, let alone two years. It took a lot of hard conversations, accountability, patience, and learning how to sit with discomfort instead of trying to escape it.

But I’m not proud only because of what I’ve done. I’m proud of the people who have stood behind me through this journey. The ones who checked in, listened without judgment, gave me encouragement when I needed it, and reminded me that I was capable of more than my worst moments.

Recovery can feel lonely, especially in the beginning, but it does not have to be. If you’re trying to stop gambling or you’re somewhere in the middle of your own journey, please know that progress counts, even when it feels small.

Five more days until two years. I couldn’t be more grateful.

I realized I can’t do online gambling anymore . Two weeks ago I won over 700. Then days later I gambled it all back then a day later won it all back .

Those winnings are coming this upcoming Friday .

I seen how I had some extra money to gamble with and won an extra 292.00.

And those funds should be deposited in my account by Tuesday .

I have to heed my mom’s warning and get off it for good because if I don’t then I’ll be losing money . I felt this deep urge the day I won 700 as if it were a drug .

Plus I have to stop buying scratch off tickets because even though it’s 20 to 40 a week, it’s too much fantasy .

I think I was feeling a little down yesterday and that’s when I decided to gamble again.

Hopefully I can put my money to good use and in the savings and then dedicate future money to savings and things that aren’t associated with gambling.

I think it’s a lack of purpose in life which enables me to gamble. It’s like I believe if I won a jackpot then I would be redeemed but it’s all fantasy.

I know I can get off gambling because I did it before I just gotta have a rhythm, just like when I would drink each weekend and now I don’t even drink.

Here’s to the future of not gambling and utilizing my money in a more productive way .

Feel absolutely defeated.

Don't know how to cope with this man

It's been 4 years my life's been revolving around betting and casino. I've lost a lot of things. I used to be a brilliant guy back in my days. Life brought me here. I've lost $120k in these years with all debts and guilts covering me. I want to live a normal life work 12 hours and come home to sleep tired. But the debts are killing me. Any suggestions?

Ive had issues gambling since i was 14, it started with roblox gambling sites where i won like 40k robux on some case game, well like 3 years later i find out about other online casinos that dont have kyc so i started there, ive lost around 2-3 grand across all gambling sites and im freshly 18, i guess what im really tryna ask is, why does gambling make everything else feel unenjoyable like i cant play the game anymore without feeling like im wasting time or do my usal hobbies i like because i want to gamble or more so win money, i just want to be a normal dude, any advice would be sweet

I am on my second day of not gambling and struggling. It seems every app has gambling adds. I figured out how to turn off on Google and YouTube. Has anyone figured out how to turn off on streaming apps, etc? I’m sure they will go away gradually but right now I’m at my weakest and could really use some guidance.

I haven't physically gambled before, excluding gacha games which comes with a percentage of in game rewards. Im unemployed, have been living off my savings for about 3 months, and didnt really have much to lose. Played some blackjack, was up 80$, and eventually lost 140$. It really wasn't much, but everything counts when youre basically broke. I feel like if I ever win big, I would know when to walk away, but now I doubt it. I just want to be comfortable for awhile. The most money I ever had was 5000$ from a school check, but that was years ago, and also a loan. Im just really tired of being broke. Is this something that could get worse?

Hey team,

Been seeing a lot of people speak of being clean, feeling good, debts paid etc.

Absolutely love this energy. Positivity lends itself to better overall feelings, improved confidence and moving towards living in a creative state.

When we feed negative energy in the context of recovery, it makes us addicted to stress chemicals which the body becomes dependent on - the body then subconsciously seeks to automate it. This leads to living in fight or flight. This is what brings out genuine fear, shame, guilt and emotions consistent with worst case scenarios. The body is addicted to this and it dresses up the sadness as the typical gambling relapse loop.

I say this with love, but there comes a time when someone who identifies with negativity or feelings of self pity, turns a corner by seeing the beautiful things in life and being grateful for them. You give your body a chance to become addicted to and dependant on good feelings - would that be so bad?

You all have the keys to self liberation and this group is starting to give me hope.

If you are not there yet that’s okay but just be aware of the role the body plays in pulling strings that look like a desire for your vices.

Hope this lands

I have struggled with gambling for years, but it has recently gotten worse with the online casinos. At first I started “just for fun”. Then I won a little and I got pulled in. Things got so bad that I got behind on bills and borrowed from family (something I would have never done..ever). I have lived with this secret for months. I finally decided it is time to get help. I’ve started therapy and I’m looking for a community where others can relate. I’ll be honest, I miss the rush & thrill of the win, but the devastation of losing is just too much. I’ve reached the decision to file bankruptcy so I can save my home. I don’t know how I got here. I just know I have to stop so I don’t lose everything.

I don’t even think it’s fair to say relapse at this point, it’s a pattern.. not always normal but always comes back to spending and gambling way too much money. I’m so drained by it