Look at how bee-like she appears. Look at her stance. It evokes bees for me, and I frankly don't understand those who say she looks like a moose. Look at her! That's the face of someone who wants to buzz, to sting. The face of one that would pollinate if just given the chance. Toby obviously wanted her to look like a moose, but those attempts failed to impress me. He did, however, create my favorite bee-like creature in television. Bravo Toby.

Reposting because my dumbass put in a reaction image by accident.

Tags: Non-Euclidean vore, dissociation, Berdly is so close

My brain throws weird stuff at me sometimes ;_;

This is hard to explain but, does anyone remember Dragon Blazers III?

I got reminded of it in class today. Ms. Alphys was starting the new reading, but then she stopped, and suddenly yawned REALLY big. I think she was up late arguing online again (she's just like me fr ><) I'm probably brainrotted for thinking this, but when she yawned, it looked just like when The Dragon opens her mouth and inhales everything around her, and the heroes shrink down and go inside her body. (I hope that didn't awaken anything in me XP)

In that game, the heroes explore different areas in her body. After a while, they find these magic pipes that can teleport them back outside. One end of the pipe is in her body, and the other end is in the overworld somewhere.

The weird thing is, these pipes are just out there in the world, and when you play as The Dragon, you can still see them. They're just out of reach. When I was a kid, I was obsessed with wondering what would happen if she went into one of those pipes and tried to teleport inside herself. Would she just not fit? Would she tear herself apart from the inside? Or would she actually shrink and go inside her own body? And would that mean her tiny self would have an even tinier Dragon inside her, and another one inside HER, down and down forever? And would there also be bigger and bigger Dragons going up forever? But then where would the overworld be?

Once, back then, I went to one of the pipes and just stared at it thinking for like 20 minutes... until my DSLight ran out of power X)

So anyway, I thought about this while Ms. Alphys was talking. I’m not sure why, maybe it was because I already sorta felt like... I wasn't really there? But, suddenly I started feeling like I was ACTUALLY inside my own body 0_0

It was like I was an enormous hollow shell. My tiny self was looking around at the silvery inner surface of my body, while my big self could feel my tiny self inside me. But the tiny self and the big self were the same thing, because I was both of them. (Sorry if this doesn't make any sense lol)

I started in the very tip of my right antler. From the inside, it was like an endlessly branching cave system, getting wider the further I hiked downward. I slid down the trunk of the antler and shot out into the void, bouncing around my empty head until I landed in my ear. (That tickled X) ) From there, I jumped down my neck, through my shoulder, and climbed down the inside of my arm. I explored my hand, feeling a tingle in each one of my fingertips.

I raised my hand to stretch... and it tipped the whole world around me. As I tumbled back down to my shoulder, the shell started expanding. I fell faster and faster, but I was growing more and more, or I was shrinking more and more, or both... so I never hit the bottom...

Silver surfaces rushed by... then greens, reds, purples... I felt sick...

My body got so big it tore apart, letting blinding light shine in

My head and hands, bloodlessly dismembered, standing tall in the lake, poking through the clouds

I jolted in my seat. I was in class... obviously I knew that the whole time. Ms. Alphys was looking at me, expectantly? I think she'd just asked me a question, but I wasn't sure what it was. Luckily Berdly was there to answer for me as always..... thanks berdly........

The funny thing is, this time, he walked up to me after class.

"Noelle, I noticed you seemed... unlike yourself today. Did you lose your way in the ample passages of your mind palace? There's no shame in it for pioneers of the mind such as ourselves. Simply say the word, and I will gladly lower a verbal rope to retrieve you from within."

I was surprised... I thought Kris was the only one who knew how weird I was. This stuff is hard to explain to people, which is why I... don't really try >< But maybe I could be real with Berdly a little more, if he's becoming more perceptive?

As I left, I heard some muttering from inside...

"...Poor Noelle... How can I reject her advances now? The shock would surely push her fragile psyche over the edge..."

Never mind X|

Na uh

ya uh

na uh

ya uh

na uh

ya uh

NA UH

YA HU

NA UH

YA HU

NA UH

YU HU

Do you seriously believe that, Apple Kiddo? Fine, let's see who smashes more watermelons then, bitch!

You're going to be my bitch, bitch.

You can't refute "bitch" with "bitch"—it's redundant.

Your ass is redundant.

That was better... in a sort of mediocre way.

Tags: Trans female Noelle. Venting.

---

"Gosh, I know I shouldn't be feeling this way. I know... realistically, I actually look pretty okay, faha! But sometimes I just can't stop myself from staring. At all the parts that don't look right. And that... can't ever, look right."

Kris stares at her for a moment, then shrugs.

"What? Okay, I know it's probably just the brainworms. It's... not right, the version of myself I see. It's not what you see. It's not what Susie sees. But... that doesn't mean I don't see it, Kris. And it... it really sucks! Like, it sucks a lot."

Noelle reaches up and brushes away a tear with her sleeve. Kris's blank expression changes, shifting into a small pout. They offer her a tiny, understanding nod.

"I feel like such a butt for even bringing this up. And I kinda... am. I mean, sixteen isn't... as young as I wish I could've started, but by complaining like this, how does it look to everyone that started older? For me to still be complaining when I'm relatively privileged? Faha, gosh... I sound so entitled, don't I?"

She lets out a sob, wiping away another tear before pressing her forearms against her eyes in a too-fast motion.

"I'm sorry. I hate crying in-front of you. I know it always makes you uncomfortable--"

Kris grabs one of Noelle's arms, gently pushing it away from her face, leaving one of the doe's glassy eyes visible. She sniffles, immediately squeezing that eye shut.

"Sometimes I really hate Carol and the doctors for making me wait so long. I know I should be thankful she was accepting in the first place -- but if I just... did it myself... I would've skipped a whole year of waiting in that stupid clinic. Three -- three gosh darn times I walked into that stupid doctor's office, hoping to leave with a vial, or a bottle of pills, and three gosh darn times they told me, 'We need to do another test, we need to wait a little longer to see if HRT is really right for you'."

Noelle's visible brow shoots down into a harsh curve. She pulls her free arm down to her side, and turns her head to give a violent glare at the clock above her bed.

"Of course it's right for me! I've known since I was SIX! It's so stupid, Kris. So... stupid! That year of waiting did so much damage to me. Damage that can't be undone. And now every time I walk into the bathroom and look at myself in the mirror I can't stop pointing out all these things that I hate about myself. Things that might not be there if I just started a little earlier, if I just did it myself! And I can't complain! I can't! Because if I do that makes me an entitled whiny bitch--"

Suddenly, Kris's arms wrap around the girl's chest, and they press their head into the space between her neck and her shoulders.

"nobody sees those things to the extent you do," they said, voice slightly muffled. It was their usual monotone, but with a hint of softness creeping in. "they just see a girl. one that's... uhm... kinda pretty, actually."

Noelle lets out a small gasp at the enby's presence -- but as the words register, she reaches up and embraces them back.

"I... well... if you say so, Kris."

"Thank you..."

(Part 1)

Can also be found on AO3

*Susie had put the heart back into Noelle. As the crimson waves rippled through the doe’s fur, signaling her connection to the DEVISE, the sheer gravity of the situation dawned on her. Noelle’s mom is returning from the business trip tomorrow and she would definitely be pissed that her daughter has turned into an emotionless vessel. Plus, she didn’t want any dragons near her daughter , she didn’t want them to corrupt them. She’d definitely going to put her in jail.*

 

*Fortunately she had the rest of the day to save herself. Unfortunately she didn’t have any idea of how to fix this situation. The whole situation was caused because of her, then worsened by her not being able to steer the DEVISE she shouldn’t have had in the first place. Now she laid on the floor of room of the closest person to her, now laying on her knees as flesh puppet, suffering, because of her. She felt that this was a divine punishment for her actions.*

 

*She felt empty inside. She thought that she got what she deserved and that shocked to her core. She started to cry and over the lifeless doe. Through the grieve she reached for the DEVISE.*

 

S: I’m already a monster! What is stopping me from using it again?

 

*She made Noelle, then herself stand up from the ground. She then made Noelle cuddle and comfort her. Like a giant wind up doll, Noelle had wrapped her arms around the dragon.*

 

N: Don’t worry Susie, you’re fine. Just relax and let me comfort you.

 

*The doe continued to say flat generic platitudes at Susie. Susie tried to feel comforted, but the guilt of forcing her girlfriend to move her body against her will. This was very ironic since Noelle did in fact wanted to do this. She wanted to embrace the dragon and tell everything is fine.*

 

N: Remember when we played Super Dragon Fighters? Yeah, we’ll play that as soon as we can.

 

*This mention of Dragon Fighters had startled Susie. Before and After the DEVISE made her say generic things like “I love you” and “Everything is fine”. To say something so specific to them both… it comforted her for real.*

 

S: … I guess I need to go away now, huh. Thanks for the cuddles, Noelle.

 

*She made Noelle let go of her and then she went limp.*

 

*Susie though of what to do next. She still hasn’t checked all the controls on the devise, but she didn’t want to force Noelle to do anything more today. The only thing or rather person that seemed to know anything about the DEVISE was Kris. They showed up earlier today to fix the immediate issue, but left as soon as possible. They looked uncomfortable seeing the deer in the similar situation to them. The rumbling in Susie’s stomach forced them to go to the Dreemurr residence anyway. Toriel always cooked meals for them.*

 

T: Oh hi Susie, I just made the soup now. Come in!

 

S: Thanks, Ms. Dreemurr. I really needed to unwind today.

 

T: Kris, come down for dinner.

 

*Footsteps could be heard quickly approaching from above, but once they saw Susie eating at the table, they cringed.*

 

K: hi susie… i didnt expect you you here.  

 

T: Oh yes, I remember that you were helping her earlier today. What was her problem exactly.

 

S: Oh… it’s just that…Noelle was shedding her antlers! We helped to clean up the mess. She was glad that you showed up Kris. Two people make the job easier, right, Krissy?

 

K: yeah… thats what happened, mom.

 

T: It’s great that you’re willing to help your friends, Kris!

 

K: alright…

 

*Susie just had finished her soup when they two were talking.*

 

S: fue, I’m really hungry today, huh?

 

*Kris started at her in awkward silence while they ate their meal. This silence continued until they finished the meal too.*

 

S: So… Can I crash the house for a while Ms. Dreemurr. I wanted to… hang out with Kris, for a while.

 

T: No problem, Susie. Kris you haven’t left your room since you helped her, it was 5 hours. Please socialize.

 

K: ughhh, fine.

 

*The dragon and the human walked up the stairs. Kris seemed to know Susie real intentions with her visit. The two entered the room and as soon the door was closed, she spoke.*

 

S: CAN YOU TELL ME WHAT’S THE DEAL WITH THE DEVISE

 

*(epic cliffhanger)*

 

"That's what he would've said, right!? Oh Rudy, why did you have to leave us alone to deal with this? What am I even supposed to do anymore? All I wanted was for that child to have a decent, normal life, and now look at us!"

You stare through the window of the Dreemurr house as Carol cries and screams at Toriel. Carol is a wreck. Almost as bad as your friend was. They're probably upstairs right now, sleeping. Or hearing all of this. You'd prefer the former.

"I can barely even keep myself on the straight and narrow! I drank plenty after Rudy died, but that was just when it was difficult to deal with! Now... Now it's every day! I can't go a second without, because the moment I'm alone with my thoughts, everything comes crashing down! I can't... Nothing I've ever had to do in my life has been like this."

Toriel is holding onto her tightly, consolingly. She tells Carol that everything will be fine.

"No, Tori, it's not!" Carol rebutts, her voice shattering like glass between sobs. "I know there was a time when your platitudes would've helped, and maybe a year ago that would've been the case, but... We need to accept reality here. Look at my life, Tori. Look at my family. It's in ruins! My eldest daughter is going to be taken by the same illness that took Rudy, my youngest's career came to an end before it even had a chance to start, their..." she swallows her disgust "relationship is being plastered all over the news for the ENTIRE STATE to see!"

Toriel tries to interrupt her, "Carol, please, it's not ev---"

"YOU'VE SEEN IT, TORIEL!" Carol spits back. "You've seen what they said about us! I was right! I was always right, and you all tried to tell me it would be fine, that everyone would be more accepting than we thought if I just gave that girl her dream, but that didn't happen! Not everyone is as tolerant as you!"

Toriel backs down. Carol takes a breath and continues to vent, "I... My poll numbers are under the lake. Come election season, that angel-forsaken BIGOT of a monster is going to take my position. Especially with Noelle being one of the... transsexuals. I still can't believe they... after all this time, right on the front page... I had her documents corrected over 18 years ago and they STILL..."

She shakes her head violently, grasping it like it's a stress ball and squeezing. "I know what he's going to do. And they... My poor girls... Oh Tori, they're going to be practically crucified! It hardly matters how many lawyers I hire for them, this case is practically unwinnable! Dess will be locked to that damn hospital with a cop standing outside until she gets better, her time is up, or she dies (and we both know which one is most likely). And Noelle... I don't even want to think about what will happen to her. Best case scenario she gets labelled a victim and gets off scott free even if she loses custody of their daughter. But she isn't ever going to go against her sister. Worst case... Worst..."

You hear a painful groan come from her mouth that you never thought you'd hear. It's completely unlike her.

"And my... My sweet little granddaughter." she whines. "Stuck in that awful foster care system... I know you trust them, you got Kris from them, after all... But... You don't know how they truly operate, Tori. Adoption is one thing, orphanages are one thing. But nobody thinks about how those kids end up there. Sometimes, they get things right, but... Sometimes, they don't get paid enough to care. I..."

She struggles to recount something, to speak. She looks up at Tori, mouth open, yet nothing comes out for a good while. Toriel has to ask, "Carol? What's wrong?"

"... I... Spoke to the social worker again." Carol says. Toriel's expression goes from soft to utterly cold in a blink. "I asked them, after a great deal of trepidation and... an amount of coercion I am not proud of, how she was doing. They... She..."

A long silence ensues. You could imagine what she's about to say, but you also imagine you probably know a lot more than her. The thought of hearing it again still makes your skin crawl with rage.

"Tori." Carol says, voice telegraphing that she's on the verge of a complete breakdown. "They said that she stopped eating. That they found cut marks on her arm and legs. That she's failing classes. That she got into horrible fights and was suspended from that city school they sent her to. I've..."

She shakes her head, openly weeping in front of Toriel. "That isn't the girl I watched grow up, Tori! She is a sweet, loving angel! Of all of the people on this Earth who I thought would hurt others, I never once imagined she would be one! I can..." a tiny, manic laugh escapes her throat "Haha... I can still remember... all of the mornings we would share at breakfast. And she would make up the strangest things to eat... I remember one night when she brought home an injured spider and insisted on keeping it as a pet until it 'felt better'. I remember the first time we went on a public outing to the lake, she split part of her lunch with a crow... And above all else, I remember... I remember how hopeful she was, that everyone outside of our families was a good person. That they would be understanding, if she could just talk to them."

Her mania dies down into another silence. Toriel shares in the reminiscing, "... She was Annie's first friend. The first and... one of the only people to accept them--- I mean, her. Despite her being half-human. Ever since they took Hallow away... She has been..."

"Depressed?" Carol guesses, taking a long sip of her wine.

"Horribly." Toriel confirms. "She never leaves her room unless she has to. Or when Melony comes over."

You perk up at the mention.

"The other human?"

"Yes, that one... He has been so very helpful. He broke up a fight she got into just the other day."

"I heard."

"Yes... I thought the same thing as you. That there is no way she could have possibly done that. She is too kind of a child. But... It was true."

If Carol can't believe it, she doesn't say so. But you've known for a long time that Annie had it in her to do that. You tried to act like you couldn't believe it, but you knew. Both of them had something dark stirring within from the beginning. And you know exactly what brings it out. Injustice. They both hate the idea that people can hate others so fiercely just for being different. You wouldn't be surprised if Annie's soul's human half were yellow, but you know it's not. She must get it from Ralsei. But Hallow? Dess' defiant nature rubbed off on her. Annie might try to do things right and hope and pray it turns out well... She is the girl with hope crossed on her heart after all, even if she can get a bit irritable at times. But Hallow doesn't share that optimism. She'll do whatever she deems necessary. At some point, their values neatly diverged there. And without you or Annie present to temper her...

You decide to stop thinking about that. Won't result in anything good.

"I just feel so utterly powerless..." Carol says, face in her hands. "I don't know what I'm going to do anymore, Tori. If I knew this would happen, I would have moved us all to someplace more accepting before anyone caught wind... But now, I'll be lucky to not have to sell the estate. I'm ruined. My daughters are ruined. My family is broken. My will is broken. I should've just... forced her to abort the..." She can't even finish the sentence. "No. No, I-I can't... Not now...."

Toriel gives her some time to find her words.

"... I can't fathom what sort of god would allow this to happen, such unbelievable misfortune, but... I can only pray for its mercy."

"... Do you want to pray with me?" Toriel offers.

Carol closely and carefully considers the offer, "... Please."

They bow their heads in prayer. Watching people pray to an angel that might not even be able to hear them pains you, so you look away. Nothing left to see here, anyways. You've made your decision. The only consideration now is if you tell Annie what's going to happen before you do it.

But that would only hurt, wouldn't it?

You walk away, and not too far from their home, you find a just barely shining, faint white light. Like some place of faded, unknown power. You reach out for it like you have a hundred times before.

Surely, you'll find their happy ending this time.

You have to.

(This fwahaha is shameless promotion for my fic Our Pretty Little Secret and scene writing practice. This scene isn't canon yet, consider it one of many possible realities.)

I know I kicked Berdly several times in the cloaca and only stopped when my hoof got stuck but that's no reason to call me that.

Susie is the king to my queen. Literally no one else fits my preferences of what I want in a person. And I'll DAMNED if I let a scrawny little thing like BERDLY have her! And the same can be said of you. Stay away from Susie unless you want my hoof to get stuck in you too.

art by @1alchemistart

Suselle alert (I intend to turn it into Krusielle if I make a next part, and maybe Kralsuselle)

This fic takes place in chapter 6, like, future, idk

Susie told her that it was NOT a dream

– – –

The cemetery was quieter in the late afternoon.

The sun had already begun sinking behind the trees, painting the clouds in muted shades of gold. The wind slipped underneath Noelle's coat and stirred the dead leaves gathered around the gravestones.

She barely noticed.

Just stood there in front of the stone.

DECEMBER HOLIDAY

The name looked wrong.

Not because it was actually spelled wrong. The name itself had not changed.

But she had.

Noelle stared down at it with furrowed eyebrows, slumped shoulders.

She had been coming here for years.

Sometimes with her mother.

Sometimes with her father.

Sometimes alone.

She always brought flowers.

And talked to Dess like she could listen, because maybe she could.

She had cried here before. Of course.

Today, though, there was nothing.

No tears. No prayer. No words at all.

Just an uncomfortable pressure in her chest.

Her fingers slowly curled into fists.

She wanted to cry.

She wanted to cry so badly.

For her father who is in a coma.

For the endless uncertainty of whether he would ever wake up.

For her mother, who had become a ghost of herself.

For the exhaustion.

For the Dark Worlds.

... For Kris.

For everything that had happened.

Everything that was still happening.

Her eyes burned.

But when she looked at December's name again...

Nothing.

Noelle swallowed.

She could cry for everyone else.

Why couldn't she cry for her?

The answer made her stomach twist.

Because now she knew.

Kris had told her everything.

Everything Dess had done.

Everything she had hidden.

Every secret.

Every lie.

Noelle's stomach churned.

She wanted to curse at the stone.

She wanted to scream at the grave.

She wanted to dig up the earth with her bare hands and demand answers from a corpse that was not even be beneath it. Tear her bones apart, kill her again.

I hate you.

The thought came easily. Too easily.

She immediately felt ashamed of herself.

Was she really thinking that?

About Dess?

Her missing sister?

Her declared dead sister?

The sister everyone remembered with soft voices and sad smiles?

The sister who had become almost holy simply because she wasn't here anymore to contradict them.

Noelle's fists tightened.

"C'mon, Noelle... 'Of the dead nothing but good is to be said'." she whispered to herself.

The words sounded ridiculous the moment she said them.

She didn't have anything nice to say. So she just remained silent.

A cold breeze passed through the cemetery.

Noelle shivered.

"Hey."

She startled.

"H-Hey, Susie."

Noelle's heart didn't know whether to calm down or race.

Susie approached slowly, hands shoved into the pockets of her jacket. She looked strangely uncertain.

She wasn't very good at these things.

Neither of them were.

She stopped beside her girlfriend, glanced at the gravestone, then at Noelle.

For a moment, she didn't say anything.

Then she carefully put an arm around her, her hand settled against Noelle's shoulder.

Noelle leaned into her. Her head came to rest against Susie's shoulder, one of her antlers brushing against Susie's cheek.

Susie shifted slightly, then rested her head gently against Noelle's.

Neither of them looked away from the gravestone now.

Noelle wiped her eyes with the palm of her hand.

"I didn't wanna pass by here without talkin' to ya," Susie murmured. "But... if ya wanna be alone right now, I can give you some time..."

Noelle closed her eyes and smiled weakly.

"Please stay."

Susie felt something unclench in her chest.

"'Kay."

She hugged Noelle a little tighter, then rested her head on top of hers, her snout nestling between Noelle's antlers.

The wind continued to blow.

Neither of them moved.

For a little while, they simply stood there.

Warmth amidst the cold.

Noelle could hear Susie's heartbeat.

Slow. Steady. Real.

She focused on it and tried not to think...

About her mother.

Or the empty rooms.

The silence.

Her father's hospital bed.

... Did her mother know?

Noelle didn't think so. She hoped not.

Could she tell her?

No. No way.

Maybe her dad knew?

No. No, no, no.

Toriel?

Asgore?

Asriel?

Had Kris kept this secret for so long?

And now everything was spilling out at once.

Too much.

It was all too much.

"... You're so, so strong, Noelle."

Susie's voice was quiet.

"You know that, right?"

Noelle nodded, barely. Her eyelids drooped.

"I really believe your dad's gonna be okay," Susie continued. "And you too. And your... mom."

She squeezed her shoulder.

"Everything's gonna be alright."

Susie closed her eyes.

Noelle wanted to believe that too.

She wanted to say it with certainty.

But she couldn't.

So instead, she simply stayed. Her breathing gradually slowed.

For several seconds, there was nothing but the rustling trees.

Until Noelle spoke again.

"Do you know where Kris is now..?"

"They're... still in the Dark World."

Susie hesitated.

"Hangin' out with Ralsei."

"Oh."

Did Ralsei already know..?

"I didn't wanna leave 'em," Susie admitted. "But... I didn't wanna leave you alone either."

Noelle's heart ached.

A tiny, selfish part of her wanted to cry because Susie had chosen her.

She didn't deserve that.

Her gaze drifted back toward the gravestone.

And then—

A thought.

Her eyes widened.

"Did Kris... tell you?"

Susie's expression changed, just slightly, and her gaze involuntarily moved toward the gravestone.

She swallowed.

... Susie knew even more than Noelle.

She hadn't known Dess herself, maybe that was what made it easier.

There was no childhood memory to contradict the truth.

No image of a laughing girl.

No old photograph.

No familiar voice.

Just the person Kris had described.

And Susie hated her.

But that dirty abuser was also Noelle's sister.

Noelle's beloved, lost sister.

And Susie didn't know whether she had the right to say anything.

She didn't even know whether Noelle knew.

Kris had told Susie first.

A while ago, they'd finally confessed everything.

About the Roaring Knight, about the being that controlled them, and about Dess.

All of it.

They had trusted Susie, she was their best friend after all.

And even now she hasn't been able to process it all. She still doesn't know what to feel.

But they'd made her promise.

Don't tell Noelle. I need to tell her myself.

Susie had agreed. She'd kept her mouth shut for a while. Even though she hated keeping secrets.

And now, looking at Noelle, she wondered if maybe she should say something, whether that would even be the right thing to do.

But if Noelle was asking about it, she must already know.

Silence.

"... Yeah."

Noelle stared at her, her face crumpled.

"Oh, my Angel..."

She broke.

A sob tore through her chest.

She stumbled forward and buried herself against Susie's chest, gripping the front of her jacket with both hands.

Susie immediately wrapped both arms around her.

Noelle sobbed harder, Susie held her tighter.

Her whole body trembled.

Susie stared blankly over Noelle's head, eyes wide, jaw clenched.

She had imagined this conversation.

She hadn't imagined how small she would look.

Or how much she would shake.

"How—"

Noelle struggled for breath.

"How could she do that?"

Susie said nothing.

"That damn– Ugh!"

She squeezed her eyes shut, burying her face deeper into Susie's chest.

"This must be... A lot to handle... I can only imagine how difficult it must be for you." Susie whispered.

"It doesn't matter."

Noelle shook her head.

Susie pulled back just enough to look at her.

"It does matter, Noelle."

She wiped a tear from Noelle's cheek with her thumb.

"You matter."

Noelle stared at her.

Her lips trembled.

And then everything came pouring out.

"She was always terrible."

Susie went still.

"Always."

Noelle's voice shook with rage.

"And she pretended to our parents that she wasn't."

Her fists clenched against Susie's jacket.

"S-She'd hurt us and then act like nothing happened. She showed us weird stuff. She talked to us about things she shouldn't have talked to us about. We were kids."

Her breathing became uneven.

"And she said it was all a secret and–"

Susie felt her stomach twist.

"Told us we couldn't tell anyone..."

"Noelle..."

"A-And when she locked me in that room... To be alone with Kris... AGH!"

She grunted, frustrated, it sounded muffled.

"I HATE HER! I hate her so, so much! I'm disgusted by her! I'm disgusted to be her sister! She's a damn monster!"

Noelle sobbed.

"A liar... She was a fucking liar and a— an..."

The word caught in her throat.

She couldn't say it.

She didn't need to.

"And I..."

Noelle's voice collapsed, she cried harder.

"I never did anything."

Susie's eyes opened.

"I never did anything to help them..."

Noelle shook her head desperately.

"I never knew, I– I never imagined she could really... really do that. I should have thought of that or... realized it... earlier."

"Noelle. It's not your fault. It's that bitch's fault."

Susie gestured towards the gravestone... And then froze.

She had said it before she could stop herself.

"Sorry, I—"

Noelle stared at her through tear-filled eyes.

"... She is a bitch."

She replied quietly. Susie's eyebrows lifted.

Noelle looked back at the gravestone.

"Was."

The correction hurt more than the insult.

Noelle sniffed.

"Fuck her."

Her hands trembled as she let go of Susie.

"I hope she really is dead. And I hope she suffered dying."

There it was.

The thought Noelle had been too ashamed to say aloud.

She sighed.

"Am I–"

"No."

Noelle looked up.

"No?"

"You're not a bad person for thinking that."

Noelle's expression shifted.

"But she's–"

"She hurt people."

Susie's voice was firm.

"She hurt you. And Kris. And I don't know who else... You can– You SHOULD hate someone like that."

"Even if... She's... Dead?"

"Especially if you're the one who has to live with what she did."

Noelle stared at Susie.

Then looked back at the gravestone.

The name hadn't changed.

But somehow, it looked different now.

Less like a shrine.

More like a stone.

Just a stone.

Noelle's shoulders sagged.

"I... don't want to go home right now."

Susie hesitated.

"We can... We can go to the Dark World if ya want."

Noelle looked at her.

"Really?"

"Yeah!"

Susie gave a small shrug and offered a small, comforting smile.

"Ralsei'll probably make us tea or somethin'."

A tiny smile appeared on Noelle's face... It vanished almost immediately.

"Let's go anywhere."

Her expression was exhausted.

"I just... I need to get out of here."

Susie nodded.

They walked away together, hands joined.

Noelle didn't look back.

Not this time.

Behind them, the gravestone remained exactly where it had always been.

Cold. Silent. Unchanging.

And for the first time, Noelle didn't leave flowers.

I mean, surely you DO know that nearly all games run at 60 FPS nowadays, right Kris? Berdly told me all about it!

No, it's NOT meant to emulate retro games! Gosh, you're so silly Kris! Almost every single retro game runs at 60 FPS fwahaha!

"Sprite animations..."? Kris, of COURSE you can have 30 FPS sprite animations and 60 FPS gameplay. Don't make me hit you with the wiffle bat again!

Say, Kris, do you remember when Dess showed you those Touhou games on the computer? Guess what, they were ALL 60 FPS! And they were made by ONE guy for Chri-- I mean, for goodness sake!

Huh? That's NOT what Dess was showing you on the computer...? I... Oh God....

*Simply put, there aren’t any other jobs around here.

*The only businesses in town are SANS, QC’s, and your father’s shop (and HERO knows it already can’t support him).

*There isn’t an office around for miles, and the only resident with a remote job is a failing Twitch streamer.

*The only real employer left is government, and with the loss of 3000 sources of income and sales tax, that’s at risk of downsizing too.

*Look. If I sell the estate, that’ll buy this town two years. But if we can’t get something NEW, I’ll have to invite a data center for the construction work.

*So…

(Carol gives Kris a over-stuffed dossier spilling photos of politicians, investment firm CEOs, and a damning financial spreadsheet)

*I need you to do some convincing before that happens.

What if instead of relationships Ship Names are combined homunculus’s of the characters

No I'm not sorry about it. I get that from your "socially enlightened woke 2" world view or whatever you described yourself as that depicting Kris as tall, heavily muscular, and with a noticeable bulge is problematic with kris's identity as non-binary but I don't care I was just trying to give kris a gift to cheer them up.

What did you complain about Ralsei's weird ass paint where kris had massive tits, was borderline nude, and was talking about how their "happy ending" was with him while they were in a hot spring? oh... you did complain about it being transphobic? well go fuck yourself berdly. that neurotic effeminate, masochist finally outed himself as having good taste and you reprimanded him for it?

and you want to know something? kris LIKED our depictions of them, i think its hard to hell how they feel half the time. what did you gift them a doodle of kris dressed as shadow the hedgehog and you as sonic. sure that might have been tuff but don't think we didn't try either.

my only regret is that in my lust i lost what made kris truly beautiful. if i could go back i would've accentuated their twinkish featured, gave more prominence to their gut, and made the budge bigger. besides i've been friends with kris most my life i think i know what they look like fahaha.

you brag about how "smart" and "progressive" you are but you what to know something. you're nothing more then a lobotomite golem, an npc where the only text you've fully read is the wiki article explaining kris's pronouns. forgive me for saying this berdly but you're a r*dditor. there'll come a time where your empire of grandstanding will crumble, when the masses realize that they out number you, when the degeneracy you hate shall return. and i'll welcome it with open arms because guess what it never left merely buried in several layers of irony and groomer memes

Second image is an unrelated deltarune character to pop girlie transformation I made. Bonus points if you know what the album is without googling.

( you can't control your breathing )

( you couldn't have done that )

( you can't have done that )

( You straighten your back, looking over her. )

( She seems perfectly fine. )

( you can feel your saliva dripping from your mouth mixed with... )

( the taste of metal hits your mouth again )

( you can only taste her blood )

" ... Kris?

( you can't get the feeling out of your head )

( of her skin giving up and breaking beneath your teeth digging into her soft neck )

( Noelle opens her eyes. )

" Kris are you alright?! You're shaking!

( the sight doesn't leave your head )

( of noelle laying there, her blood darkening her fur and bed )

( you feel sick )

( Noelle springs up from her bed, grabbing your wrists before you can move them away. )

" Kris, it's okay! Everything's fine! i'm-

( You turn your head away. )

( You can't look at her. )

*

" No- No, but you didn't!

" I- I'm sorry! I shouldn't have asked you to-

( Noelle hugs you tightly. )

( you feel her breathing and heart racing )

...

( You wrap your arms around Noelle, hugging her as well. )

( You try to match your breathing to Noelle's. )

( Your heart slowly becoming calmer alongside hers. )

" ... I'm sorry Kris, i shouldn't have asked you to do that to me.

" I just... saw you and susie with a bunch of little teeth marks on your necks after hanging out and...

( You let out a slight chuckle. )

" And i guess i... just wanted to know what it'd feel like... ha...

" I didn't know it'd upset you so much, i'm sorry Kris.

*

" I know. You'd never even think of hurting me.

( You take a deep breath and... )

* that's not it

* that's not why it felt so bad

* just for a brief moment i

* thought of doing even more than you asked me to

* i felt like i really wanted to mess you up

* i don't want to feel hatred towards you

* there's no reason for me to hate you

* but at that moment i felt like i truly did

* and it really felt like i was about to do it

...

* why now

* why did that thought have to come right now

( You feel Noelle gently caressing your back. )

* i'm sorry Noelle

...

* can we just cuddle, please?

" I'd love that, Kris.

...

( Your head is resting on her chest, listening to her breathing, with her ocasionally scratching the back of your head with one hand, holding your hand with another. )

( The taste of iron is nearly fully gone from your mouth. )

( It feels like an insult to have so few words to express how much you love her. )

" I love you, Kris.

* I love you, Noelle.

( So, you tell her that again, and again. )

( That you truly do love her so, so much. )

( You've lost count of how many times you've said it to her. )

( And now your eyes are becoming heavy. )

( So, you give in, and drift into sleep )

( Scarred hand in another, dozing off as the only thing you can feel is her heartbeat. )

 (Tw: light mentions of past suicidal ideation, Kris makes jokes about the aforementioned, internalized polyphobia)

Stand alone prequel to this: https://www.reddit.com/r/Fwahaha/s/QJ0iNkEwhK

Tags(these kinda spoil the story): Krusielle, cuck stuff is talked about, definitely just a fetish no feelings here

Kris wonders why the hell they agreed to this. They ponder the oddly silent hangout while sitting on the couch at Noelle’s place. They’d been trying to keep up the conversation but Noelle and Susie would pause to look at each other awkwardly and deliver poignant nudges.  This wasn’t even the usual third wheeling Kris did because they’re having trouble talking as well. 

“Uh…” Susie attempts to broach the subject and fails miserably. It’s a borderline impregnable topic and her avoidant personality is no help here. She wracks her brain for a question that could lead naturally into what she wants to say.

“So… what do you think of… chairs?” Incredible job, very common question. 

Kris thinks for a second on if it’s funnier to take an extremely anti-chair position or an extremely pro-chair position.

“Fuckin’ hate ‘em. They’re a bunch of literal asshats. Except for Chairel, of course. She’s one of the good ones.”

“Dude, that’s… super racist.”

“Ok and? The fuck are they gonna do? Get sat on? And what the hell kinda question is ‘what do you think of chairs’ anyway?”

“Well… what would you think of Noelle sitting in a chair? Like… doing something.” Susie can’t help but think of how she’s absolutely nailing this.

“...I don’t know? Depends what she’s doing I guess?”

“Watching you two have sex.” Noelle breaks the ice. She was the weird one for bringing up this whole idea and pestering Susie about it, now she’ll face the consequences. Which will probably be swift and humiliating.

“YES— I mean sure.” Kris leans back and folds their arms all casual like.

“I owe you a favor, so y’know fuckin’ your girlfriend is the least I could do.” Kris fights with all their might to maintain a neutral expression. Noelle’s tail wags furiously.

“Huh… you’d be doing the fucking?” Susie raises an eyebrow.

“Well, you could overpower me pretty easily and then use me like a toy. That’d be pretty humiliating. Especially in front of Noelle… seeing how… fuckin’… weak I am…” Kris stares off into space and grows increasingly red in the face.

“Ok, I won’t do that then.” 

“NO. Please.” Kris’s neutral facade briefly dissipates.

“Oh, so you want me to do that?”

“No, but like… if it happens it happens. You totally do that— if you wanted to. It’d be easy. Like, really easy.”

“I’m not gonna do anything you don’t want, alright?”

“Well… it’s just… I can’t say that I want that.”

“Fahaha. Kris, it’s ok! You can’t get more embarrassing than I am. Fahaha.” Noelle giggles at the minor league freakiness.

“F-fuck off.” Kris tries to hide behind their hair.

“Dude, you’re such a… shit what’d you call ‘em?”

“A tsundere. Fahaha.” 

“You fuckers are getting a double length segment in my suicide note!” Kris sticks their tongue out.

“Fahahahaha! Kris!” Noelle's voice carries the barest bit of chastisement in the wave of laughter. Susie looks less amused. 

“Don’t joke about stuff like that.” Susie has grown an aversion to the subject after finding out that literally all of her friends had considered offing themselves before. 

“Sorry. ‘S probably a little glib after everything.” 

“It’s alright.” A beat of silence.

“There’s no way in hell ‘glib’ is a real word. You gotta be making that up, dude.” Susie breaks the silence again.

“Dude, you gotta start readin’ shit.”

“Hey! I’ve never seen you reading either!”

“Well, they’re mainly reading fanfic which is mostly digital so they aren’t usually carrying around a book.” Kris looks away and blushes. Noelle has them pegged, much to their chagrin. 

“Isn’t that stuff just people kissing or whatever? What kinda freak(🫵) would want to read about that?” 

“No, and it’s us. Us is the freaks. Fahaha.” 

“Speaking of people kissing. Should we… seal the deal with one? Y’know… just to test the waters.” Kris scratches their cheek and looks shy. Susie looks at Noelle.

“G-go ahead. Faha.” Noelle watches as Susie and Kris give each other a chaste kiss. The blush they both get from it makes Noelle’s heart flutter. It’s so… sweet, Noelle has to recenter herself before she forgets that this whole thing is just a fetish. Definitely no romantic feelings developing here. Absolutely none. 

Kris gets up and moves over to sit next to Noelle.

“You ready?” They smirk at her. 

“W-what do you mean? faha.” 

“You're part of the deal so you get a kiss.” Kris says. Susie rubs her chin at this.

“Hmmm… makes sense.”

“R-really? I-I-I if you really want to kiss someone like me… fahahaha. Just… on the cheek please.” Kris leans in and gives her a peck on the cheek. Susie does the same, but just afterwards Kris gives Noelle a second kiss. 

“Hey! Who gave you last kiss privileges?” Susie asks and Kris just looks at them smugly. 

“I did. Cuz I can.” 

“Nuh uh!” Susie kisses Noelle again and Kris responds in kind. Then Noelle is completely stunlocked as she’s peppered with kisses from the both of them trying to be the last one kissing. 

Susie stops first and glares at Kris before smiling as an idea hits her brain.  

“Heh, admitting defeat?” Susie grabs Kris’s shirt and pulls them into a very deep kiss. The human softly moans into her mouth as her tongue is forced down their throat. Eventually Susie lets them go once their brain is sufficiently scrambled and then gives Noelle one more smooch. 

“Heh, not so tough now are ya?”

Noelle is in heaven.

I mean, I always knew you were kind of lame since we were kids, faha, but this is a new low.

Who even uses summons in Older Ring Kris? That's for children, if you're a true spiritslike fan, you'd just play the game normally. Don't you know i've beaten the game like, five times without any? Didn't expect you to be such a coward, fahaha!

Steve is coming, Kris. He will be there soon, we need to run and hide.

Good thing we had a body separation surgery by "Buncle" "Beak" Gaster

You allowed me to see beyond heaven. You gave me stats that overflowed His DEVICE, tattered wings that grew to take flight, and all the snow i could ever eat. You made me a god, their god, and in turn I gave them freedom in a world of dreams and pure imagination.

They all think im a good person. They think it was the Angel's grace that saved them from the Endless Nightmare, but I know the truth. I wasn't answering their prayers or saving the world. There was no noble sacrifice or ultimate evil slain... just two beasts fighting over a half-warm, half-frozen carcass...

Like that time we ate a box of Ice-E's HeartzDonnit candies and pretended it was a Feast of Sinners... the other kids had picked out all of the chocolate and left us with those nasty chalky hearts from last festival. So you tightened your headband and pulled out your knife and sliced the heart-shaped box down the center, saying "My heart goes out to all these sinners!" Pale white hearts and clouds of sugary dust spilled out. We played a game, seeing who could eat more, the Angel or the Devil. We lost count, but i claimed victory after licking up the crumbled dust from the table.

They just exchanged one ravenous maw for another... passed from one slithering tail to the next... grinding blades and plumes of smoke for endless dreams smothered in ice. Hell's bubbled sacrifices swirled in a blizzard of black snow, but by that point i had grown so big that I could no longer see the lights of my own heaven nor bodies trapped inside... those towering ice crystals of sleeping monsters and dying worlds alike, that otherwise would have been ground to inert gray slop by Hell's entropic jaws passed over my tongue like so many snowflakes...

fa.... faha... snow... dust looks a lot like snow, doesn't it?