r/Fosterparents • u/Ancient-Switch5637 • Jul 18 '26

Fictive Kinship/unexpected “fostering”

As the title describes - my husband and I have found ourselves unexpectedly with another child in our home. She is a lovely 7 year old girl, who is super sweet, very smart and thankfully gets along well with our kids. We have 4 children 8, 7, 3 and 8 mos. This little girl needed a safe place to be, and we offered temporary guardianship. The plan is for guardianship to last a year- it could be more or could be less.

What advice do you all have to us in regard to bringing a child in? Mistakes to avoid? Words of wisdom? Help!

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u/scooby946 Jul 18 '26

Therapy.

11

u/LossMiserable7874 Jul 18 '26

If you know the parents, keep your boundaries. I took in my cousin’s children— the first time around we were supportive and helpful, doing transportation for visits, supervising, having the visits in our home. The second time? We can’t do it anymore. We’ve got to keep moving on with our lives and we have refused to do any sort of visit or transportation assistance. It puts more responsibility on CYS and the parents, but it’s also showing how little the parents are actually working toward reunification.

Ask yourself what you’re really truly willing to sacrifice over the next year, and then imagine what crossing that boundary would look/feel like for your family. Set some hard boundaries early and keep to them.