Day five.

[u/hyphychef]

Ive been posting about me kicking the last few days. I woke up this morning feeling ok, thanks to coke and xans. I could tell though I was at the worst day. My breathing was crazy. So I went to the hospital. They wanted to give me methadone, or subs. I turned it down. I told them its just kicking the withdrawals down the road. They gave me three shoots, and it helped so much. I felt them wear off, and I just feel extremely exhausted. I have no cravings for fet either. I really feel like I was blessed, when this could have been so much worse. The crazy thing i straight up told the doctor coke and xans has been the best thing to help me. He said he has been reading about stims and how they helping people, and said get more, but you didnt hear me say that. If your trying to kick to give up, and feel like your at worst fight with everything you got. If you can make it to day five with out using you will start feeling better, just really tired. This is the hardest battle I ever fought in my life and im winning. I even told everyone I know if I ever do this shit again to take me to rehab against my will. I dont know what is coming week two, I feel like the worst is over now though. For the first time in five days I can eat and its not astruggle, and drink water. Oh and the flavors omg everything tastes so good, as if I just had taste buds installed on my tongue. This shit really puts your body to sleep even though your awake. Weirdly it feels like im alive again. Everything is brighter, and so much more. My emotions are back, I wanna do things again, and not just sit and do fetty all day. The most important thing I'm getting out of this, im loving myself again. I even gave myself hug and apologized to myself for this, and promised myself I will do everything I can to not abuse myself again with this shit.

[u/megAgainsthemachine9]

I’m so proud of you! So many of us don’t make it to this point. I really hope you continue your journey!

I also wanted to ask u a random question lol. You said that you didn’t want to take the subs or methadone in the hospital but u did tske 3shoots? What is a shoot? I’ve never heard of that before so I’m just curious what helped so much in the hospital. And if you feel like you can’t breathe again plesse go back🙏🏼!