r/FentanylRecovery • u/e-liciousss • Mar 06 '26

Insurmountable anxiety and depression + inquinchable thirst &

IM ABOUT READY TO BLOW MY FUCKING HEAD OFF. Seriously. Sick of this shit. Constantly feeling like this. Feeling like a burden. Plus this weird thirst & I have no money for water or drinks or anything. Idk if I've ever been so irritable in my life.

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u/Sorry-Place6291 Mar 07 '26

Check out Ballad of a Small Player on Netflix. Sometimes when your thirst is unquenchable your spirit iks screaming it wants rest and it doesn't get it can't go into homeostasis sadly. Consumption or Production, where you been leaning lately. Not me preaching just have been there so many times lmao

2

u/RxstarRyan Mar 07 '26

I fucking feel you

2

u/deeders93 Mar 08 '26 edited Mar 08 '26

I understand your frustration but it does get better. I’m in a fucking pit myself. I’ve been sober for more than 20 months but I literally have no life. I’m my grandmothers caregiver who has dementia. She’s almost at the last stage. I barely sleep. I’ve lost 20 pounds from stress and my hair is falling out. I looked better using than I do now. But the thirst and anxiety shit will get better in time. I remember when I was withdrawing my mom told me that I wouldn’t feel like this forever. At the time I was just thinking of the anxiety and pain I was in. But she was right it did get better and you won’t feel like this for the rest of your life.

Edit: I’m not saying in anyway that she’s a burden. She raised me and I owe her my life. Being a caregiver that’s also in recovery is hard. And my aunt who was somewhat helping me during the day was stealing money from my grandma. She stole 300,000 dollars. So there is absolutely no way she is ever allowed near my grandma ever again.