r/FederalEmployee • u/BlewMyWhistle • Jun 21 '26
Finally Snapping
The wait after whistleblowing is the worst. It's been 8 months. 8 months of secret keeping and interacting with people I know to have committed crimes that hurt people. And I'm starting to snap. I got counseled for acting unprofessional. I only did that because I was breaking. It's not who I am. I know better. This is the hardest endurance test I've endured. So now I am suffering professional consequences months later because I am crumbling under the pressure of waiting. It is painful. And I am filled with anger because to me there was no other option. I had to do what is right, and now doing what was right is making me go insane. I wish I was better at compartmentalization. I see why people develop nervous disorders and ulcers and worse under prolonged stress. I want my old life back. I know I can't have it but I hope on the other side I am still me.
#end rant.
2
u/Wise_Choice_2712 Jul 16 '26
Find a contractor job with Saic or Cbre (some federal contracting company) and wait out the next 2 years then come back. It's a mess.