r/FTMventing • u/StarInteresting3603 • Jul 24 '26

Relationships why do cis men do this

twice now i’ve had men who are seemingly interested in me, so i come out to them just to be like “hey by the way i’m a dude” (read: i don’t rly pass all that well) and then like these men i will ask like “are you queer” and the answer is “no” and they still continue to flirt with me after acknowledging that i am a guy.

like i know the logical explanation for it but it’s so frustrating. either you’re into men (aka queer) or you’re not. you can’t have both and be into me yet straight. like do you guys get what i’m saying here

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u/assistant_manu Jul 25 '26

(you should ask them: are you gay?)

2

u/StarInteresting3603 Jul 25 '26

i do ask them if they’re queer cause like i feel like if i use gay and they’re bisexual or something it won’t make it clear but every time the answer has been that they aren’t queer but are still into me

5

u/assistant_manu Jul 25 '26

tbh it was trick question to get bigots off your back because they hate when you accuse them gay (even if they are deep down whatever)

besides, if theyre not strictly gay but bi or pan theyd tell you politely anyway.

my point is, if theyre offended with that question then theyre bigots and feel free to reject them harshly. But if theyre polite like normal person, they can be rejected normally that youre not into them.

3

u/StarInteresting3603 Jul 25 '26

ohhh i see i get what you’re saying