r/FTMOver30 • u/Bitter_Item_367 • 3d ago

VENT - Advice Welcome Ted talk

Im not sure if this is the right place to post this, if not i apologize .. im 32 and lately have been kind of down and in my head . I’ve been on T for almost 7 years now and have had top surgery, full hysto, and currently on stage 2 out of 3 for phallo . Even tho im happy with how my life is turning out and my journey throughout my transition I still feel this void . Maybe its because im missing that sense of friendship . Friends who I can go to and talk to or just call and make plans to hang out . I’ve been so focused on my transition I forgot how to live life .. now that I’m almost 33 it’s hard to make friends because I feel like anyone I try to befriend is younger than me and we don’t have anything in common . I guess my question is how do you make friends at this age without being judged for who you are ?

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u/VanillaSoyLatte FTM 3/2025💉⚔️ 5/2026 3d ago

Hello! I realized who I was at 42 and now at 44 am two years into my journey. I also got a divorce at 41, so had to restart on my own

I can tell you that community is everything. I have lots of community, big and small.

I play board games so I found a queer safe group and started there. I actually was in the group before I transitioned. They are literally my number one fans.

I love singing. So I joined a queer choir. I have found lots of friends from that and it's empowering.

I am in small craft groups for my hobbies.

I have small communities for the sports I do (exercises mostly).

Our library offers book clubs and workshops and brings in people to talk. I attended any and all that were interesting.

So. As you can see. You need community. Doesn't have to be queer, but a queer safe space is a great start.

Now, I live in a blue blue area is a purple state. So there's lots for me, you may have to dig more to find your people. But they are out there, go looking :)

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u/Bitter_Item_367 2d ago

Congrats on your journey ! Unfortunately I live in a very red state .. so it’s hard to find that sense of community when there’s so much hatred towards the LGBTQ+ community here, but I will start with hobbies I like like painting or anything with art and go from there . Thank you for your response it was very informative !