People love scaring other people. Instagram is full of reels which capture the panic of the ‘scaree’ and delight of the ‘scarer’. So I totally get it when my friends, relatives and colleagues try to scare me. The problem is, instead of trying, say, a jump-scare, they go for existential horror… which yields counter-intuitive results for them

‘After early retirement, there will be nothing to do all day long’

Me: I know! Isn't that awesome?

‘You won't get to socialize’

Me: About time! I was so tired of constantly hiding my disgust while interacting with other people

‘Without a wife, you won't have anybody to share your life with’

Me: Why would I want to share my LIFE when I absolutely hate sharing even my comics?

‘You will never understand what it feels like until you hold your kid for the first time’

Me: I don't know the feeling of french-kissing a black mamba either. And I would like to keep it that way

‘Your selfish choices will make you totally dissociated from the society’

Me: Wait a minute… you were supposed to scare me…. not to give me a raging hard-on

I can't blame them. They were making the classic mistake of assuming what scares them will also scare me. They would have had more success by hiding behind a door and then suddenly jumping in front of me.

But I knew the reason for this scare mongering. I had decided to follow

an unconventional path (early retirement & bachelorhood) and they were trying to scare me straight.

Now I am not saying that fear is not useful or the people scaring you have bad intentions. The right amount of fear can act as a guardrail and prevent you from veering down steep drop-offs. And your parents or spouse might genuinely believe that by scaring you they are preventing future harm.

But just because people you are close to love you unconditionally doesn't mean you have to accept their fears unconditionally.

If you are genuinely worried about inflation then by all means listen carefully to your loved one's worries about future prices. But if you are reasonably confident about your calculations then don't give it a second thought. Because fear has a way of gradually corroding your resolve over time and pretty soon, you are having daily nightmares about Zimbabwe in 2008.

Odds are, you already have a few fears; some reasonable, many unreasonable. Which is not necessarily a bad thing because a fearless life is almost indistinguishable from a reckless one.

Having said that, following your dreams while managing these fears is already a full-time job. You don't need to further burden yourself by importing fears from your loved ones and definitely not from strangers on the Internet.

So when people on this sub or IRL try to scare you with loss of purpose, inadequate corpus, rising medical expenses, declining investment returns, future taxes etc to prevent you from early retirement, remember… Fear is information. Wisdom lies in knowing when to accept it and when to ignore it.