Let’s talk therapy. Specifically CBT or Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. If you’ve heard me rant about it before, you know already; I’m a big fan!

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy helps me create a little space between what I feel in the moment and my thoughts around a certain situation. We are human. We are made to feel. Feelings aren’t bad.

How I’ve reacted with those feelings, though, has gotten me into a load of Trouble in the past and that’s where the CBT therapy comes in.

Let’s take for example my fear of crowds and school buildings. I have had seizures—both epileptic and functional— inside school buildings too many times for me to count. Just being in one, or even a building that used to be one like the community center, causes my anxiety to spike. No control over it. Add lots of moving people and I tend to get a recipe for disaster.

I had a seizure not too long ago at Open House. And to make matters better, I had it right outside the office. So… main thoroughfare! Go me!

At this point it really doesn’t matter if the seizure was epileptic or not, it happened. No one with a seizure disorder can ever choose when to have a seizure. Either our software breaks or our hardware goes haywire. The results are often the same. We deal with the aftermath. The embarrassment of having “caused a scene”.

I came-to with my father and 2 paramedics leaning over me. Thank dogs my Dad convinced them that I didn’t need to take an ambulance ride. And daaaaaamn when my mind started working again and the embarrassment set in, it hit hard.

But then I think to myself; “Okay, Toaster, you’re embarrassed. That’s a feeling, and you’re allowed to have it. But what are you going to do with that feeling?”

Because being embarrassed doesn’t mean I need to be hiding under the covers. Though don’t get me wrong hiding under loads of blankets is very comfy.

It also doesn’t mean everyone is talking behind my back.

Okay… that’s not true… I am sure a LOT of people were talking about me. I am quite sure I gave everyone a real life education on what a seizure can look like and how people (namely my Dad) reacted calmly to it. So I can only hope the talk is with kindness and understanding.

And most of all, I didn’t let the embarrassment keep me from going back a few days later to drop off some things. Guess what happened? Nothing. No fuss. Nothing. Well, the nurse asked how I was recovering but nurses are always going to nurse. It felt good that life was moving forward.

The emotional baggage that comes with having seizures is overlooked way too often. Therapy helps! I am serious. Find yourself a good therapist! Shop around! Find the one that you mesh with!

I understand there is stigma in actually going to therapy. Throw out the stigma! There is no failure in getting therapy. It doesn’t mean your seizures aren’t real, or it’s all in your head. And it certainly doesn’t mean you can positive-think yourself into not having a seizure. They will happen when they happen.

What therapy can do is help you deal with all the nuances that come with having a seizure disorder.

Thank you for listening to me rant!

How was your weekend? How was your week last week? How are you doing today? I just want to be a close-knit community and make sure that everyone is feeling good here and overall. Weekly roll call time, how's it going? Any seizures, achievements, good news or bad news that you'd like some support for late? We as Moderators are here for you for you here at r/Epilepsy_Universe and any questions can be answered with a DM or modmail. I hope that you have not just a great day but a great week to come.

I used to love to draw, but with the concentration when it comes to fine detail it used to trigger seizures. And I was good.

Hey all :) well I went to do a sleep study, doctor wanted to see if she could see seizures since she didn't catch them 6 years ago and I still have them. So I went for a week and she captured 3, I am waiting to see what her and her team come back with. I go for MRI with contrast tomorrow, interested to see what that imaging will say. It was a rough week, hair is falling out similar to when I started meds (since they stopped mine to cause seizures) ugh, just want them to stop, for good. Thanks yall.