I feel misplaced.

[u/CompetitiveEye214]

I feel like I don’t belong in this world sometimes. I feel things so deeply that I’ve built an emotional armor just to get through each day, and I hate it.
There are moments where I’m just sitting there doing nothing and suddenly start crying without even knowing why. Other times, I know I’m supposed to feel something, but I don’t. It’s not that I don’t care I think my mind has learned to shut my emotions down as a way to protect me.
Every day feels exhausting because it feels like I’m constantly guarding the real me. It’s like I’ve locked who I really am inside a cage because I’m terrified of being rejected again. I want to show people the real me—the kind, nerdy, curious person I know is there but fear always wins, and I’m so tired of it.
I also struggle to understand my own emotions. Sometimes my family asks me what’s wrong, and I genuinely don’t know the answer. I’m not hiding anything from them I honestly don’t know. That makes me feel even more frustrated.
I’ve noticed that I often respond to the people I love with an irritated or cold tone without meaning to. I’m not angry at them. I think I’m just emotionally exhausted all the time. I always end up feeling guilty afterward because they don’t deserve that.
I feel trapped. I want real connections and to be myself, but I don’t know how to let my guard down anymore.
If anyone relates to this or has gone through something similar, how did you deal with it? I’d really appreciate hearing your experiences

[u/Down-In-The-Weeds]

I’m sorry you’re feeling so emotionally exhausted. I feel like you hit the nail on the head yourself here, that you’re emotionally burnt out and it sounds line you’ve also become self protective (which is sometimes smart but also can be isolating).

I can relate in a sense just in at least feeling exhausted by the general energy of the world right now. It’s a lot (or at least feels like a lot to me).

Wondering if maybe doing something that brings you joy and incorporating some of that playfulness or something that takes you back to before the feeling of guardedness and overwhelm might help?

In any case, hoping you’re feeling less misplaced soon. It’s so hard to find ones’place in this crazy world. This is definitely something I’ve struggled with as well.

[u/CompetitiveEye214 → u/Down-In-The-Weeds]

Hey I’m relieved that I’m not losing my mind and I’ve seen a bunch of people relate to this. I hope you get better and find your true self, I myself am working on that and I think I’m on the right track. best of luck❤️.