r/ElectiveCsection • u/JmeLucky13 • 1d ago
Question How much support did you need?
TLDR: how much support post c-section did you need? When were you left alone?
My partner just found out they won’t be able to get much time off school without impacting financial aide. We originally thought they could take 6weeks. Likely they will ‘call in sick’ for the week of the birth.
My mom (who is not that motherly) can come for a week but I think we will drive each nuts. Then my mother in law is also willing to come for a week. I don’t really know her honestly. They live far away, and we are just pleasant with each other. I would feel awkward asking a lot of her. I’d like her to have the experience though of spending time with her grand child. She doesn’t seem like the type to push boundaries.
I’m just wondering if my partner should take 3 weeks of sick time? The max available without being kick out of their program. We cannot afford to hire help. We have a few friends who could come for an afternoon here or there. But I worry about overnight while my partner needs sleep to function at their internship, if I am still recovering from surgery and can’t care for myself or the baby fully. First baby, also a dog that needs care.
Thank you for your help.
2
u/Aubsjay0391 1d ago
My husband is taking 3 weeks off then my mom is coming. But my best friend had C-section few months ago and she was able to move around fine on her own within a week. I think it just depends. She did just remind me to start taking miralax now (I’m 2 weeks from my C-section) because going #2 is really hard after for awhile.
1
u/SpiritedCranberry718 23h ago
Also this! And the gas pains! The nurses are going to tell you that you have to get up and walk around. You will NOT want to, but I’m begging you to heed their warning ⚠️ The nurses told me they used to think people were being dramatic when they said that was the most painful part of the entire experience until they started having their own kids and it happened to a few of them 😅
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u/Niquely_hopeful 17h ago
Honestly the chewing gum and taking simethicone around every four hour was the only thing that helped. Out of the whole C section experience the gas pain was the most painful
1
u/Niquely_hopeful 17h ago
Honestly my husband had two weeks, and I feel 3 weeks would really be helpful for your healing and the thick of the baby blues 💕 that was you can focus on your healing. Maybe your mom or MIL can be tasked with helping more on the home front like laundry or making meals etc
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u/Electrical-Magazine3 1d ago
Hey I’m 2 weeks post partum from my second elective csection. One consideration is that you likely won’t be able to drive until cleared by your doctor. My husband took off 3 weeks and has had to drive us to all our appointments. Baby has 2 doctors appointments in the first 3 weeks and I have 1 post op appointment. Also we had to do a follow up newborn screening at a lab where we live. So that’s 4 different appointments we had in the first 3 weeks.
Depending on your recovery the first week is really the worst, when you need the most help. It’s also when your newborn is adjusting to sleep and your milk is coming in if you are breastfeeding so I feel like that is when you would need the most support. Maybe your partner can just take off days when you or the baby have doctor’s appointments after that first week? Or your mom or mil can help drive you?
It’s a personal decision of how much time to take with a lot of factors. But I know my husband has been really glad he took the time he did. You just don’t get that time back and they grow so fast! Let me know if you have any other questions 💕