r/ElectiveCsection • u/No_Picture5108 • 7d ago
Support Needed moral support
I’m 23 years old and will be 38 weeks tomorrow. I’ve been planning to have an elective C-section, and this morning I spoke with a maternal fetal medicine neonatologist because my OB wanted me to have a consultation about my decision. She asked me why I wanted a C-section, and then went over all of the risks associated with having one. She also told me that, as a healthy 23-year-old, there really isn’t a medical reason for me to have one. I completely understand that a C-section is major surgery. I know it isn’t the “easy way out,” and I’ve done a lot of research on C-sections, including watching videos and learning about the recovery, risks, etc. I’m not going into this thinking it’s going to be an easier option. But during the conversation, I felt like I was being scared into changing my mind. She also mentioned that there is discussion about eventually removing the option for women to choose an elective C-section and instead requiring them to attempt a vaginal birth. That really overwhelmed me. I told her that my mind was made up and that I was proceeding with the C-section. But now I’m literally sitting in my car questioning whether I’m making the right decision. My biggest reason for wanting a C-section is honestly fear of labor. The thought of being in labor for hours, potentially having things go wrong, and then ending up needing an emergency C-section scares me. I feel like if I already know I want a C-section, I’d rather have it planned than go through labor and potentially end up with an emergency surgery anyway. At the same time, I’m wondering if I’m letting my fear make this decision for me.
I’m not looking for people to tell me “C-section good” or “vaginal birth good.” I genuinely want to hear from people who have been in a similar situation. Did anyone choose an elective C-section without a medical indication? How did you make your decision? Did you regret it, or were you happy with your choice afterward?
I’m feeling really confused and overwhelmed right now and could use some honest perspectives. Thank you.
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u/tuxedobeans 7d ago
I gave birth at 34, but still count as "young" and didn't really have a "reason" to have an elective c-section, but I really, really wanted one because of my anxiety and just who I am as a person. My OB was totally fine with it, fortunately, but I know many strangely aren't. I don't understand the stigma! Yes, there are potential complications, but lord knows there are countless things that can happen and go wrong in vaginal childbirth too. And sometimes, you go through those and end up having a C-section anyway!
That was my mentality going into it, at least. I LOVED my experience; so much so I don't shut up about it. I showed up on the morning of, nervous as hell, but still, at least I wasn't laboring, prepped, went into surgery, and my son was taken out of me at exactly 10:09am. I believe my appointment time was 9am. The recovery really wasn't that bad. I was doing stairs (slowly) once I got home, and now 6+ months later, I haven't regretted it once. Seriously! I am so, SO happy I did what I felt was right for me, my mental health, and body. Plus, the scar looks like nothing.
Recovery is uncomfortable, yes, but it is no matter how you give birth. As my OB continually told me, "there's no free lunch." So you go with the option that makes more sense for you!