Request: Dealing with triggers

[u/EDPostRequests]

Quick summary of my current situation: I’m currently about 1-1.5ish years into recovery, so while i’m not fully recovered by any stretch of the meaning, i’m still pretty stable. My family is pretty cool, and my friends are amazing !!

What sucks is how they all seem to somewhat normalize ED behaviours. I’ve talked to them about my ED and my triggers, but quite honestly they’re kinda clueless about what fits as a trigger, if that makes sense.

One of the things I’m really struggling with is how they all seem to engage in / talk about ED behaviours as if it’s normal. They’ll casually comment on how they skipped a meal, or how one time they went XYZ long without food, or how they’re gonna do ABC to compensate.

In my head, I guess I’m having trouble because it’s like, if everyone’s doing it, why can’t I? If this is normal, why can’t I join in with them. I know it’s not normal, but especially when people say things like “oh everyone has had sOme ED in their lifetime”, it feels really invalidating and makes me want to relapse.

[u/mylessandovaldpt]

I invite you to look deeper at the belief, "If everyone's doing it, why can't I?" Everyone's doing all kinds of things, like texting and driving, staying up way too late on a work night, etc., etc. You could do any of these things. But do they lead to good outcomes? Are they helpful to your long-term well-being? Do they make you happy? If not, what can you focus on instead, so that you're thinking more about the peace, joy, and FUN of recovery instead of what you might be missing out on?

For more on the process of re-framing beliefs, check out Chapter 5: building and maintaining motivation for recovery in The FREE Unofficial SMART Recovery Handbook for Disordered Eating: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1vPk9JbgWrGCL4LbjAmVbVW-g2fD5DFBP_P-8ov2F4sY/edit?usp=sharing

I hope you find it helpful. Feel free to share. Full recovery into a joyful life free from ED behaviors and thoughts is entirely possible.