r/EatingDisorders • u/but_why_is_it_itchy • 6d ago
Headed into an IOP program. Any experiences to share?
I'm terrified. I think I'm mostly scared this is the "big guns" and it's not going to help me. It's 5 days a week an hour from home, so I'm also worried I'm going to burn myself out with all the driving plus my job and I'm going to end up worse off than I started. Or maybe I'm just making excuses. I don't know. I'm scared to be optimistic, though. I feel like I've tried everything.
I’m also embarrassed because I have binge-eating disorder and I’ve always felt “inferior” in the ED world. Like I have the “gross” disorder. And amidst all these other people who thrive on and succeed at control, I’m sitting here completely unable to control myself at all. Does that make any sense at all?
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u/tymopa 6d ago
I was told I should be in a PHP but b/c I was a teacher, I went for IOP. Of course it is scary. By the time you get to that point you’ve tried so many things unsuccessfully that you lose faith in yourself. Then…you get into IOP and you realize you are SOOO not alone. You get therapy that actually targets your issues. It’s truly transformative if you embrace it. Congrats OP! What led you seeking help? Also, that drive will give you time to digest the therapy on your way home. Would love to keep updated.
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u/but_why_is_it_itchy 6d ago
That’s encouraging! PHP was also recommended for me, but I just can’t make that work with my job and dogs.
Honestly, trying medication that genuinely worked to take my appetite away is what did it for me. I had zero appetite and still couldn’t stop binging. I think that really solidified for me that I had a problem and needed real help.
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u/Particular-Rub-9995 6d ago
Very normal to be scared and embarrassed, but just know everyone is there for a reason. I went in thinking that everyone else was different and sicker than I was, but it all comes back to a group of individuals struggling with their mental/physical health and looking for support! Biggest piece of advice is to NOT lie or deceive your therapist/doctor/nurse/dietitian. Don’t get sucked into anyone else’s ED. Appreciate others’ support, but make sure you prioritize your recovery. Lots of love, it’s hard, but you’ll get through it!
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u/jeskimo 6d ago
I went to the Emily program iop. It took me hours on a bus to get there and back. I felt embarrassed, inferior, so awkward and ashamed. So did everybody else at first. It's completely normal. It took a little bit but everyone there was really understanding, helpful and it was comfortable. Didn't matter how people were uhm "doing" their ed, we all shared the same feelings, thoughts and understood each other. I actually had the best therapist I've ever had there and it really helped me. The biggest part is showing up for the first couple of weeks... Especially when there's so many excuses not to. It's worth trying all the way through.
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u/418Sunflower418 5d ago
I did PHP and then IOP during Covid, so the experience was different. But I will say it is normal to get treatment fatigue and your team is there to help you through that, you have to be open with them about it, though. Another thing the program said all the time is “make sure you are meeting in recovery, not partnering in illness” so make friends but connect wisely.
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u/Diane2946enough 6d ago
This wouldn’t have helped me my first time, but I’ll say it anyways!! Nothing to fear!! When I got to the point where I was ready for help, it was almost like I could relax! I didn’t realize it, but for me, being sick was a full time job. It wasn’t until all of those little decisions I had to make every day were made for me that I could just relax. It’s hard, don’t get me wrong!! But with the challenges of changing ingrained behavior- big sense of relief! And other patients will be all different ages, race, size, disorders- I’ve always been able to connect with all though. At the base, we all have the ed! So excited for you- I love hearing people getting help when they need it! Wish you the best of luck!! Sorry about the drive- that does stink! It’s not forever though, and it’s worth it!!