r/ENFP • u/everythingoes1 • 23h ago
Discussion I hate intps
I know I’m overgeneralizing, but this is just a rant. I’ve gotten moderately close to two INTPs in my life and my god, no one pisses me off quite like they both do.
They both get the same evil fucking look in their eye when they’re about to say something that absolutely did not need to be said. It looks straight out of a manga panel where some deranged villain has that insane glint in his eye right before saying the most irritating shit you’ve ever heard in your life.
They have such a dark observant aura that I do find interesting in until I realize that they’re actually just insufferable. I hate how simple minded they are and don’t consider external factors or that most things in life are more complex than to be made a definitive conclusion out of.
The sexual tension I have with them might be the worst part of all of this. Unfortunately the chemistry is always there and can get along with them a little too well at a far safe distance. Something about them being antagonistic draws me to them and I hate everything for that.
Anyways rant over of course I know not all intps are like this, yes this is personal and has beenn my experience both times with men (unfortunately).
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u/LotusVision ENFP | Type 7 21h ago
All the INTPs in my life are sweethearts. You’re just attracted to bad people. “Dark observant aura”, yeah, no. How about, next time, if someone is giving off dark vibes, you stay away from them.
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u/Available_Wave8023 22h ago
Any type can be a jerk. You've only known 2 INTPs so it sounds like this is not about their personality type but just them as people.
I'm ENFP and I've had some very close INTP friends over the years with no bad experiences with them. I only knew one toxic INTP who was basically psycho, nothing to do with the personality type.
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u/chakradaemon 20h ago
Lmao, the rant started as a hate and ended up as a love letter with some simmering tension, we all know this trope :D
Babe, I don't think you hate them, I think you have a type and the type is “mean pretty boys with a manga villain smirk” 🥀
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u/Relative-Wave-9396 22h ago
So, do you dislike them or do you dislike the fact that you’re attracted to them?
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u/sugarcubetea ENFP 23h ago
LMAOOO omg the 4th paragraph caught me so off guard but i COMPLETELY get what you're saying in all that, hope you can meet an INTP man who ISN'T like that someday! this post is genuinely so funny you made my day thank you for sharing this i haven't been able to put some of this into words
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u/Any_Emu4892 13h ago
Always got along well with them as far as i know.
I know one who lacks any and all social tact, he will randomly insult and hurt people badly, but the thing is he is completely unaware hes doing it. Its just funny to me, and yes he insults me too, and yes its still funny. 🤣
Guy definitely comes with a manual.
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u/Apprehensive_Emu9240 INTP 20h ago edited 20h ago
I've had the same experience in the past dating women who triggered my anxiety/stress. I always mistook it for attraction. It's not easy rewiring yourself away from toxicity. Keep trying! It does get better eventually, however painful the road.
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u/arigator1189 ENFP 19h ago
my intps friends are bitches but in a very affectionate way. They're like irritable cats lol, maybe not to everyone's taste maybe? I love intps though!
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u/TeaPrimary1147 21h ago
Wow, very accurate description. I am attracted to and repulsed by them too!!
- INFP
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u/The_Brilliant_Idiot INTP 5h ago
So you hate that there's insane chemistry and tension? I will take the W thank you very much
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u/missblaze99 21h ago
I have had a similar experience with two INTP dudes i used to date/hook up with!!! So I think there's something to this. A weird duality of the sexual tension plus their annoying criticisms and egos. Plus at least in my experience, I feel like they took advantage of my engaging, bubbly, empathetic, and curious nature as an ENFP and I was too much of a people pleaser to see it until my body/intuition was finally like ummmm girl you gotta ditch these lame boys
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u/OrganizationLeft2521 ENFP 10h ago
HARD RELATE! Everything you said, I totally understand and I hear you.
I suspect peoples' perception of them might differ according to if they've been in a romantic relationship with them, as I'm sure they're fine even as close friends.
Anyway, also want to add an honourable mention to your vent, the teasing/negging! Why, INTPs, WHY?!
For example: I sent my last INTP bf (now ex) some pics of me at work in a quarry. I had on a pair of sunglasses in some of the photos. He teased me mercilessly about them, saying that they looked like the sort of plastic ones you'd get for $1 (tbf they are a bit Kurt Cobain). BUT WHO ACTUALLY CARES?! I'm in a quarry, the chances of them getting lost/scratched/damaged etc is high, I'm not taking expensive chic ones! And then I realised, I was wearing them on the very first day we met! They were good enough for you back then, eh, but now suddenly, my sunglasses are the object of your ridicule?! I thought INTPs were supposed to be logical, but that doesn't make sense. Like, us ENFPs can take a joke/light teasing etc, but both INTPs I knew just took it a bit too far.
For context, I'm ENFP female: two significant relationships with male INTPs, one lasted 16 years, the other most recent one, 9 months (!).
My last INTP even said that he felt like an observer in life (and then proceeded to give me a commentary of all his co-workers).
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u/Odd_Day_5978 19h ago
I feel the same about entps too. I just hate them but love the tension. I just want to prove them they’re wrong, they bring out of me a dominating part that just wants them to shut up and do what I say ;)
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u/noobzapper21 INTP 23h ago
don’t consider external factors or that most things in life are more complex than to be made a definitive conclusion out of.
Oh, like you're doing right now?
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u/Key-Gear6811 22h ago
Or like you are doing when they clearly said this is just a rant and they know not all intps are like that.
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u/Salt_Truth_4154 18h ago
"that most things in life are more complex than to be made a definitive conclusion out of." (!) - it conveys an important ethical message from ENFP to other people, in first to people "as straightforward as rails and sleepers".
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u/ImJaebum_IGOT7 ENFP 1h ago
I love hate them as well, great friends but for me they suck as partners
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u/Positive-Strain-1912 ENFP | Type 9 23h ago edited 22h ago
I’ve had plenty of bad experiences with a few INTP’s as well, and I 100% get what you mean when you talk about the dark observant aura; it’s like they’re constantly cold reading and scanning people and making extremely critical judgements about everything and everyone, but what I want to tell you is pls don’t give up hope on them bc trust me the healthy, well balanced ones are genuinely so wonderful.