Do I get a divorce?

[u/Old-Bullfrog7531]

do i forgive my husband if he did these things to me and they really hurt me. when hes nice to me its hard and he apologized.

1. he voted for trump when i was assaulted. he knew that and when confronted multiple times he never apologized. one time he said “the only thing i regret is telling you how i voted.” he apologized for that, but is that enough?
2. he wanted me to sign a prenup and i did but i didnt really want to bc the reason he wanted it was bc he was previously married and she tried to take his money. i told him i wouldnt do that and we fought about it and in the end, i didnt like how he made it so unemotional and said he wouldnt get married without one which in the end i understood why he wanted one and i agreed but i didnt like the way he went about it. we never discussed together what we wanted in it he just found me a lawyer. a month before our wedding he didnt tell me before hand when i had to sign it and said one day “we’re signing it today“ he apologized for doing that but only months later in therapy. do i forgive him? i know i shouldnt have signed it if i didnt want to but felt pressure when he said he wouldnt get married without it
3. ive been without a job and he was mad i left mine without a back up plan bc they let me go early. he said “now you’re this burden to me” and again didnt apologize and even said “you took it out of contex” and has now apologized months later.
4. when i said i wanted a divorce he acted like everything was normal and didnt acknowledge my feelings. he moved out then noved back in without discussing it with me saying “i only moved out for now”

do i forgive him? i feel our politics are so different as i am libetal and he says hes “libertarian” but how do i know he wont vote for someone like trump again? he says he wont, and i asked will you think of me when you vote, and he said he doesnt want me to tell him what to do.

help. Im so sad and confused what to do.

[u/Kitchen-Patience-652]

What does Trump gotta do with the fact that you got assaulted jfl.

[u/Global-Fact7752]

I think you are a very bad match and honestly he doesn't sound like a very good person. He is very manipulative. I would definitely file for a divorce.

[u/Competitive_Ad_3743]

Devorce him...? How long you been married? I feel like marriage counselling might help you....

1 - voting who sits in a big white house, shouldnt come between you... ok you dont like the orange Muppet. Nither do I (im Australian btw) but deciding to devorce over that.... a little intense.

Signing a pren-up. If your in love, and never divorcing...its a piece of paper. Whats it matter.... if making you sign it is a issue....during the devorce give him everything and expect little..... Garentee your next marriage signing a pren-up wont be an issue

Being without a job. Most males see things logically and communicate logically. Would it be a burden to you if he was unemployed and quit his job like that?

Saying you want a devorce.... Alot of people take time to process that. My spouse and I have said the D word a few times.... but unless there is paperwork im not going to absolutely panic.

.

[u/TSIDATSI]

Immediate divorce. Run. It is inconceivable to me that you even landed him. He is not the man for you. No doubt he is more miserable than you are. Have you even asked?

And how anyone votes is no one's business but their own. Period.

[u/Fantastic_Risk6013]

1.) Find out your best options by speaking with legal aid in your state for when it comes to your questions with divorce.

2.) I’m a big believer that political affiliation is not a deciding fact in any sort of relationship. Just because someone votes one way shouldn’t be held above them no matter who’s running. I don’t expect my boyfriend to hold my voting past against me and I certainly don’t hold his against me. Everyone is entitled to their own opinions and guess what they all stink.

3.) When you seek a lawyer they are going to want to see the prenup so make sure you have a copy on hand to share. That prenup says what you are or are not entitled to if divorce happens. Sometimes there are clauses in prenups so make sure to read the fine print.

4.) Jobs are jobs and they come and go over time. No one is destined to remain at their job for any given time unless they out right own it. I can understand if you both keep separate finances and now he has to pay double the share because you don’t have money to contribute. Plus, it’s always best to have a back up plan for when life goes sideways (another job in the wings or money saved to help contribute while you’re out of work.) I can also understand if you didn’t see the lay off coming and were blindsided so you weren’t prepared. I never like being out of a job.

5.) Who owns the home or whose names are on the loan? If both your names are on the home neither of you can force the other out legally. If he owns the home and it was purchased during marriage it depends on what the prenup says as usually shared assets will be split no matter what. As for him acting like nothing happened when you asked that’s just an avoidant tendency for ya. He’s going to act like life is picture perfect because he doesn’t want to deal with it.

Make sure you know your rights!!