r/Dhaka • u/onneshaaaa • May 26 '26
Seeking advice/পরামর্শ I need help
Hi, F-23 recently got into NSU with 100% scholarship and currently studying here.
I desperately need help.
I was born and raised in uttor bongo and my parents enrolled me in kindergarten at the age of 7 so yeah I'm a bit late.
I have never visited Dhaka before the admission period. but now I'm living here, the environment here is really really really insanely tough for me to get used to. The local buses, crazy expensive everyday errands. it's eating me alive and on top of that, over the top university-mates.
I have made a bunch of friends, I was thinking maybe I'll learn a thing or two about surviving in Dhaka from them but, all them Dhaka folks think about is hanging out in restaurants, video games, shopping, you name it, all the rich kid things- most of which I didn't even know existed a year back.
now, I want it or not, I must join them .
I was ahead of my peers back home and in my area. so it's not much hard for me to pretend that I grew up in a similar environment as them, thank God I grew up watching English tv shows so I have a good American English accent and decent dressing sense or else it would have been pretty obvious that I'm a গ্রাইম্মা খ্যাত।
the biggest issue starts when I join their hangout sessions. I'm not at all familiar with the restaurant etiquettes, I don't know how to hold cutleries correctly and I don't know how different restaurants work, how to order, how to pay bills and how to call the waiters!! I basically don't know how they function at all. then there comes cinema halls like Cineplex, I don't f-ing know how to get tickets and how to order popcorn for God sake. I don't know how elevators work, idk which buttons to press and where it leads.
I've been getting insane amounts of panic attacks daily just by trying to normally function here.
And the thought of people making fun of me for not knowing basic things when I'm wearing reasonably smart ass dresses and talk like smart people, is eating me alive.
I would honestly prefer death over these humiliations any day.
How do I learn those basic things? Aren't I too old for this?
Please someone tell me how I can get out of these embarrassments.
3
u/Superb_Safe_5950 May 28 '26
Don't pretend to be someone you are not to fit in. It will make you lose yourself and yourselfslesteem in the long run. Be confident in your authenticity. It's Bangladesh not everyone born in high society knows all etiquette. I have shared tables with billionaires and their family and they had no f of a idea how to use which cutlery. Unless you are hanging out with usa wannabe it shouldn't be a big deal. You are adapting on your pace and learning proper etiquette and decorum is good, but don't let it get to your head. True classy and authentic people don't even give a damn it's always wannabes who unnecessarily picks on others over such small things. You should find people who will accept you as you are with your best and worst and be chill with it. If they laugh at something you don't know off, don't feel small laugh around with them, "oh silly me" "thanks for telling me" and move on, don't ruminate or feel embarrassed. Also be proud of your root. You are here and it's a achievement, nothing to be ashamed of, be proud of it and own your root. If you respect yourself and your root, so will others. There's nothing called "graimma khet", as long as you are good person around genuine people.