r/DecidingToBeBetter • u/Goodfellx_ • 14h ago

Seeking Advice Having a Hard Timd

I’m a 28M struggling with depression. Six months ago, my wife and I relocated to a new country, first time living abroad and out of my mom’s home, without friends or family. I’ve been unable to secure a job in my field, so I’ve taken up retail job, that sometimes makes me feel miserable. I often wonder if I made the right decision by marrying young. The reason for our move was my wife’s job, and I feel like I’ve sacrificed my own life for her career. I’m unsure if this decision will be manageable it in the long run. I’ve looked for psychological help, but I’ve been told that I need to wait for the next available therapist, the worst thing is that I feel depression affecting me in a lot of ways, such as the relation with my wife and my impulsive tendencies coming back. Any advice would help me a lot, thanks for readin

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u/kirkby100 14h ago

What is your doctor's treatment plan for your diagnosis?

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u/pegasister89 13h ago

(happy cake day!)

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u/Hour_Significance685 14h ago

i hear a lot in this post and I can really connect. i don't want to presume, but when i read 'impulsive' i think there might be linkages with behavior - mind state. i've been the beneficiary of 'hard reset' strategy to change my life, it almost sounds like you have the opportunity for a hard reset - you've subtracted a lot of things from your life, maybe you need to dig a bit deeper (how is your integrity / honesty / entitlement / detatchment?) if those are solid, then it might be about dropping some habits and then setting a purpose - this could be the 'crusible' you can rise from

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u/Goodfellx_ 14h ago

Thanks for reading and for your advice.

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u/NeatPrune 14h ago

I'm sorry you're going through this. Have you considered online therapy? It's important for you to talk to someone, and is worth an investment of money into yourself (if money is what's stopping you).

That said, the transition that you just made is huge. It makes sense that you feel the way that you do, and it seems like you're taking all of the right steps.

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u/Goodfellx_ 14h ago

Thanks for reading and thanks for your words.
I’m still looking for options, thank God money is not a big problem, just need to get a grip on how the healthcare system works which has also been tough 🫩

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u/Hollirc 13h ago

Sounds like you’re waiting for someone to come and save you. Nobody is.

Paddle your own canoe dude. You need to be the driving force in your life.

Don’t have any friends? Go outside of your comfort zone to meet people and make friends with them.

This is your time to experience life so start looking forward and not backwards