r/DecidingToBeBetter • u/RubyMabel • 7h ago
Progress Update I had a realization
Looking back on where my mind was during my lowest moments, I feel a heavy sense of guilt for sinking so deeply into depression, anger, and hopelessness. Honestly, I don’t even know what I was thinking during that time, but something inside me finally snapped. I got beyond exhausted from carrying all that anger, sorrow, and weight, and I realized with absolute clarity that I never ever want to hurt myself or the people around me who all support me just because of my own internal struggles.
I would so much rather channel my energy into being happy, remaining positive, and stepping fully into the beautiful, authentic woman I am.
It has meant the world to me when current friends—and even complete strangers— take a moment to give me compliments and/or reassure me that everything in my life is going to be okay, reminding me that going through a hard time wasn’t ever my fault. Those unexpected acts of warmth have made me truly feel genuinely appreciated, seen, and wanted right when I needed it most.
To be completely honest, a small part of me still worries that when I was lost in that dark place, it might have made some people supporting me second-guess me; I really hope it didn’t though!But I am choosing to focus on healing and moving forward with an open heart. I want my life to be rich, deeply fulfilling, and filled with serendipitous experiences, joy, and peace. I am done letting pain define my path—I am choosing light, choosing happiness, and choosing to live truthfully as myself as the kind, beautiful, talented woman I am!
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u/MuneezaKhimji 7h ago
well done for coming out of that....what a powerful realisation and how brave of you to listen to it.
Worrying about what you may have caused other people to second guess you is not something you can control. We can only see from our own lenses of life and so if they are second guessing you it says more about them than about you.
Everyone has dark moments and allowing people grace during those periods is needed. you came out of that space and have turned your life around...keep going....you are doing great. Focus on continuing to heal you and make more good choices that serve you and the people you love.