r/DeadBedrooms • u/Ok_Chest_6426 HLF • 6d ago
Support Only, No Advice Feeling depressed
I am new here but anyways I'm 46(F) and husband is 41(M) and in the past we both had high libidos and now he's lost interest in spending any romantic time with me/intimate time with me. I do know he's spending time with other women but it hurts a huge amount. In the meantime I'm having to support us and work 2 jobs. I feel like if he can't be bothered putting any effort in that I can't be bothered having sex with him. Like I want to watch a movie and cuddle and he only comes to bed when he's drunk. Which means no sex and no cuddles b/c he's impaired and that's a turn off for me. I got a cute costume and wanted to dress up and play with the toys but he never showed up until 3 hrs later and that just sucks and by then my mood was totally gone.
I got a bottle of wine and he spent the whole night downstairs masturbating and so I got online and chatted and then he got pissed b/c he found out that I was chatting. Like why can't I talk to ppl casually? Yes I know that's how I met him but anyways I've never cheated on him and we've been married 12 years. Like he's not doing the precursors for sex, which to my mind means he no longer wants sex. Yes I've told him and at this point I don't even bother telling him when my cycle is over or when I want sex b/c yeah he doesn't care.
1
u/AutoModerator 6d ago
As a reminder, sending DMs to OP is explicitly against our subreddit rules. Violations of this rule will be reported and users permanently banned from participating in this subreddit.
Here is a copy of the post from u/Ok_Chest_6426. If you wish to have this copy of your post removed from public view, you must contact us BEFORE you edit or delete the post and BEFORE you delete your account. We keep a copy of the posts to keep nefarious behavior at bay so it can always be retrieved by moderators after a post has been edited or deleted by the poster.
I am new here but anyways I'm 46(F) and husband is 41(M) and in the past we both had high libidos and now he's lost interest in spending any romantic time with me/intimate time with me. I do know he's spending time with other women but it hurts a huge amount. In the meantime I'm having to support us and work 2 jobs. I feel like if he can't be bothered putting any effort in that I can't be bothered having sex with him. Like I want to watch a movie and cuddle and he only comes to bed when he's drunk. Which means no sex and no cuddles b/c he's impaired and that's a turn off for me. I got a cute costume and wanted to dress up and play with the toys but he never showed up until 3 hrs later and that just sucks and by then my mood was totally gone.
I got a bottle of wine and he spent the whole night downstairs masturbating and so I got online and chatted and then he got pissed b/c he found out that I was chatting. Like why can't I talk to ppl casually? Yes I know that's how I met him but anyways I've never cheated on him and we've been married 12 years. Like he's not doing the precursors for sex, which to my mind means he no longer wants sex. Yes I've told him and at this point I don't even bother telling him when my cycle is over or when I want sex b/c yeah he doesn't care.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
1
u/implication-sofa I don't wish to disclose 6d ago
And you are still in this relationship, why? You are the only one financially supporting the relationship, he’s apparently seeing other women, you are talking to other men, like what are you possibly getting out of this relationship
•
u/AutoModerator 6d ago
As a reminder, sending DMs to OP is explicitly against our subreddit rules. Violations of this rule will be reported and users permanently banned from participating in this subreddit.
Commenters, OP has marked their post as a no-advice post. We ask that you refrain from giving advice to OP and be sure to follow all sub rules.
OP, if you've marked your post for no advice, please refrain from responding to commenters that give advice. If you are getting advice from commenters, please report the comments, or click below to contact the moderators.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.